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  #1   Add to ldaniel13's Reputation   Report Post  
Old June 16th, 2008, 06:19 PM
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Growing Lonely 1

Growing Lonely 1


This is my first work of fiction in a long time, so any constructive comments are welcome. ~Thanks~

The bell rang, and a cheer spread quickly through the classroom. Everyone hurriedly packed their bags and started talking excitedly about what they were going to be doing over the summer, which forced the teacher to slowly trail off in mid-sentence, mumbling under his breath about ?...disrespectful kids? as everyone started to make their way to the door. Ricky and I, heads together in quiet conversation, idly started to leave the room at the back of the herd of students eager to start their vacations.

?Eric, you know my dad is letting my sister and me stay with him in England this summer.? Ricky?s father?s family was from Bristol in South Western England, and his father had returned there after the divorce. ?Are you going to be okay for a whole summer without me? Eh, buddy??

Ricky was looking up into my face with his slightly sad gray eyes that seemed to say ?I know you need me even if you act like you don?t.? Ricky was a shorter than average kid at 5?5?, but he would always say that his next growth spurt was just around the corner. He had a slim, toned build and perpetual tan from being on the cross country team. His black hair was short and spiky, and he was currently showing his big dimples and a hopeful grin.

Ricky was gay, and he had a crush on me. I hadn?t acknowledged it outright, and I don?t think that he knew that I knew. We were both too afraid of what would happen to our friendship to speak of the elephant in the room. At that point in our young lives, we weren?t even sure what being gay entailed. He hadn?t drawn much notice as being gay because he was active in sports and hadn?t shown a public interest in guys yet. Ricky and I had known each other since we were toddlers, but I still didn?t know how I felt about the whole gay thing. Although I hadn?t dated any girls yet, I found them attractive and I didn?t think that I was gay. Being such good friends with Ricky, however, made me feel like it wouldn?t be that bad to be gay as long as I was with him--lately that thought had made me slightly uncomfortable around him.

I nodded, my shaggy blond hair falling over my ice blue eyes as I was looking down at him. ?Of course I will.? I reached out and ruffled his hair, and he half-glared/half-smiled at me. ?I?ll figure out some way to keep busy. Maybe I?ll lift weights or something.? I had grown about a foot in the last year and was at a respectable 6?2?, but my weight had not kept up. I was strikingly skinny at 140lb. Even though I was eating like crazy, I was only just now starting to put on a little mass. ?My dad just got that family gym membership last month.?

?Yeah, your dad is a total fitness freak. Maybe you can make the basketball team or something next year if you bulk up a bit. I?m sure that your dad will help.? He punched me lightly in the stomach. ?I think the girls would find you even cuter with some muscles on you.? Ricky?s expression turned slightly sour. I had a reputation in our class as being quite attractive; however, I didn?t understand what the fuss all about. In my opinion, I was a pale, awkward, gangly stick of a kid. My low opinion of myself is probably why I hadn?t asked anyone out yet--I mean why would they want me.

?Maybe...? I had been on the basketball team in middle school, but I wasn?t looking forward to being at the bottom of the totem pole in high school. ?I don?t want to think about that right now.?

Ricky frowned as if I had grown a second head. ?Well... we?ll see how you feel about things next year.? His expression changed to a hopeful look that I wasn?t sure was just about basketball. ?See you later.? He gave me an awkward goodbye hug in the now empty hall, and I glanced around to see if anyone saw. Ricky stepped back, looking vaguely guilty.

He turned and quickly walked down the hall, but his book bag was partly open. I started to say something, but it didn?t come out fast enough. He was rounding the corner when he ran into a teacher, spilling his books and papers everywhere. As he was apologizing for his clumsiness, I went forward and knelt down to help him gather his stuff, which is when I saw the open notebook. In between algebra notes was my face drawn in profile. It was drawn with great attention to detail... and love. I held it gingerly as Ricky finished picking up his stuff without looking at me. He reached out for the notebook and froze when he saw what was in my hands. His face turned red and he started to tremble. This time he turned and fled as fast as he could, clutching his book bag to his chest.

?Wait! Ricky...? I felt a guilt that I didn?t know how to explain. I was too shocked at the quick turn of events to move. I thought about how the light caught the tears welling in his eyes. It almost made them look like two pools of silver. I glanced down at the notebook and felt nauseous.

That was the last that I saw or heard of Ricky that summer.

The teacher that Ricky had run into was looking at me with eyebrows raised accusingly. ?Eric, what was that all about??

I turned away from the teacher without replying.

The time that I spent walking home passed in a haze. When I walked in the door, my mom came up to me to ask how my day had gone. As she was opening her mouth, I yelled, ?Fine!,? and I proceeded to stomp up the stairs, go in my room, and slam the door. I heard a picture fall off the wall and crack, but I didn?t care. I just locked the door, hid Ricky?s notebook under my mattress, turned my ipod up, and threw myself onto the bed. I heard my mom yelling at me and pounding on the door as I turned the volume up even higher.

***

Later that night, my dad got home and was talking to my mom in a hushed voice downstairs. I had calmed down a bit and was thinking about things. I knew that I was going to get a talking to. As I heard him coming up the stairs, I prepared myself for the worst, my heart beating faster with each of his steps.

He knocked, but I remained silent. I heard jingling keys and the lock turning. He came into the room without waiting for a response. ?Son, that was completely unacceptable behavior this afternoon. Even if you are upset about things, you can?t take it out on your family.? He had a stern gaze that was reproachful but still concerned. ?Is there something you need to talk about??

I must have looked ashamed enough already because, after a few seconds, he sat down on the bed next to me and waited.

After waiting in silence for a few seconds, I started talking. ?I just have a lot on my mind right now,? I said noncommittally. ?My best friend is going away for the whole summer.? I thought that this simplification of the events would be easier for my dad to understand. ?I?m also afraid of being a total wuss when I get into high school. You remember how tough a time I had in elementary school when I was smaller than everyone. Middle school is over, and I have to start all over again!? My voice broke as I was talking, and it made my ranting seem even more shameful and childish than I already knew it was.

My dad looked at me for a second and sighed. ?That is tough about Ricky, but you knew it was coming. He has been planning this trip for the last month.? He paused before continuing as if finally making a decision that he had been considering for awhile. ?Regarding your second problem, I have a solution that involves two parts. It would require work on your part as well as a little risk...? My dad was fidgeting uncomfortably. Since it sounded so important, I sat up next to my dad and clasped my hands on my lap, leaning forward and listening carefully. At that moment I was particularly conscious of, and disgusted by, my gangly arms and bony wrists.

?For the first part, you know that my firm works on folding new proteins and researching their effects on living organisms.? I nodded. My dad worked for a small Biotech firm in Seattle, and he was very respected in the research community--I wouldn?t hesitate to call him a genius, but I suppose that I?m biased. ?We found a new protein that seems to cause muscle growth in the lab animals. I engineered a retrovirus containing the protein, and we injected it into the animals to cause the animals? cells to produce the protein themselves. There have been no negative side effects so far...We are planning to use it for AIDS and cancer patients to help prevent muscle wasting. It could be the discovery that I become famous for.? He was looking at me proudly.

I couldn?t believe that this was going where I thought it was going. ?What does that have to do with me??

Once again, he paused uncertainly. ?I might be able to smuggle some of it out for you. We are just now starting phase I of clinical trials, so it technically wouldn?t be legal, but I remember what high school can be like. Kids that age can be so cruel. Plus, it might help you get on the sports teams, and that would make you more popular, right?? My dad, a complete nerd in high school, was obviously traumatized enough by his experiences to try to give me this advantage that he never had. ?It also couldn?t hurt with the ladies. Is there anyone in particular that you like?,? he said teasingly.

?Yeah...? My first thought was of Jenny, who I sat behind in Algebra, but the mental image expanded to include Ricky, who had been sitting beside me, drawing the picture of me while I was staring at her. Color rose to my cheeks, and my dad chuckled, mistaking the cause of my blushing as my admitted shyness around girls.

?You are at an age where your hormones are raging. There is nothing to be embarrassed about, son.?

I kept my mouth closed, feeling like my dad would never understand the truth. I don?t think that I understood it either.

?The second part of this scheme is that you would have to work out pretty hard and eat well for the best results. I could be your personal trainer and nutritionist since I know my way around the gym pretty well.? As Ricky had said before, my dad was a fitness freak. He had been overweight and uncoordinated as a kid, so he overcompensated as he got older by having a very rigorous workout routine and diet. ?Well.? My dad stood up. ?Let me know if you are interested. You would have to be able to work hard and keep this secret from everyone--including, especially your mom. You?ll just have to tell them that I?m helping you out at the gym.?

I imagined not being bullied at school, being the sports star, and dating whoever I wanted... If I was stronger, I wouldn?t be plagued by these feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy, would I? My dad apparently mistook my blank stare and silence as being uninterested and was about to leave. As he was walking out the door, I quickly stood up, never so certain about anything in my life. ?I?ll do it!?

I smiled as I thought of what Ricky?s reaction would be next year at school.
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Old June 16th, 2008, 07:06 PM
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[COLOR=Yellow]Great story! Looking forward to Chapter 2.[/COLOR]
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Old June 16th, 2008, 07:13 PM
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I love where this is going so all I can say is "Part 2 Please!"
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Old June 16th, 2008, 07:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VoyagerPrime View Post
[COLOR=yellow]Great story! Looking forward to Chapter 2.[/COLOR]
Agreed!
you have created a wondeful base for this story to grow along with the character lol.(no pun intended) lol

I cant wait for the next chapter. I have no complaints about this chapter at all.
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Old June 16th, 2008, 07:26 PM
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Very, very interesting... Can't wait to see some muscle growth, next... Keep up the good work!
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Old June 16th, 2008, 07:54 PM
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Very enganging start...

... I'll be following this one with keen interest. Looking forward to next installement.
- TagsNOLA
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Old June 16th, 2008, 08:16 PM
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Wow. Nice nice start. Both Ricky and Eric are so engaging--can't wait to read more about them.

-- Rowan
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Old June 16th, 2008, 11:04 PM
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Great setup. Definitely want to see more.
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Old June 17th, 2008, 05:20 AM
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Hey man, I wanted to added my congratulations to the list. This is a great setup and I can't wait to see where it goes from here!
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Old June 17th, 2008, 03:16 PM
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... you cut it too soon.

You HAVE to continue it now...
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Old June 17th, 2008, 03:34 PM
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Soon

I will post a longer portion soon. I was waiting to see if there was a positive response before writing too much. Thank you everyone, your opinions are all important to me.
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Old June 17th, 2008, 04:22 PM
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Excellent start and, as you can tell, we're all eager for another installment. Get cracking!

xoxo

Richard
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Old June 17th, 2008, 08:12 PM
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Wow, good story, good characters, good writing! Can't wait to read more!

-Brad
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Old June 18th, 2008, 10:37 AM
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cool begining! I want moar!
It was very good, pal
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Old June 18th, 2008, 01:45 PM
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I have to agree with everyone else...


can't wait to see

Growing Lonely 2
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