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Old December 27th, 2013, 10:46 AM
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Hi everyone! Here it is, finally, my first piece of a story. English is not my first language. I know there?s gonna be a lot of mistakes. This is very PG-13 right now. I might include more mature content when I go on with the story. This is like a first draft I wanted to share.

Each chapter takes the point of view of a protagonist of the story.

A first taste


I was sitting in the park waiting for my friend Harry. He was aware of what was going on in my life and he said he could help me. I told him the entire story about my family. I was the oldest son of two. My mum died few years ago and my father became a ghost that I barely saw the mornings before school. He had to take a second job to provide our needs and pay the private school where my brother Edward was studying. He wasn?t a bad dad. But his absence in our lives made me take the responsibility of the house. But I never felt in charge. I was 18 and Eddy was 16. I never had time for sport and now it was even harder to find free time and take care of everything. My brother on the opposite never did a thing to help. Since our mum died, he was revolted. Dad never admitted but Eddy was a spoiled child. They gave him the best clothes, every penny that he demanded, and of course, he had to study in the best private expensive school of the world. And he spent a lot of time at the gym. Fate was cruel and he became slightly taller and way bigger than me. My position of eldest brother was crushed by his size and I became his servant. I tried to fight but every time he beat me when angry.

So, Harry knew everything about it. There he came.
?Hey man! What?s up? I asked him.
Harry was a regular young man like me. He had brown hair when mine was dark. He was wearing glasses that always slipped of his nose. When he sat, he put his backpack between his legs on the floor.
? Glad you?re here! He told me.
? So tell me, why all the secrecy about this meeting. I could have come to your house or something.
? No! he exclaimed. It wouldn?t have been wise to do that. My father must not know I?m giving you this.
? ?This?? What are you talking about?
? Well, you know my old one is a scientist and works for this company? ?
? VittaMix?
? Right. They have many projects going on but the one my father is working on is, how to put this, ironically perfect fit for your actual problem.
? Wich is?
? You dealing with your brute of a brother.
I looked into the eyes of Harry and felt that he was a little too excited about his plan.
? I don?t want to hurt my brother with any kind.
? I know. He reassured me. We won?t do anything to him. But YOU can reach to his league.
? What? How?
Harry opened his backpack and showed me a transparent bottle with white liquid in it. And he explained:
? This is a special formula that can make you better than a grown man in every way.
? I? what?

? It is specially designed to men; there would be no reaction if a woman drunk it, except maybe some more hair on her body, yerk! But on a man, this make everything grows like a fertilizer. VittaMix considered my father?s researched but they actually thought this was too powerful and dangerous to expose to the world. Imagine a product that makes you the ultimate man. How could they sell more once everybody gets it? Well, they asked my father to find a less potent formula and he put this one on undetermined waiting.

? And here it is? I told in a whisper. My mind went nuts just thinking about the possibilities. I could outgrow my brother again, become the real man on the house. People would actually turn heads when I walk in. I wouldn?t be shy anymore to find love. I could help my father working as a security guard or any task that requires super strength. No. This was too much, it couldn?t be. I looked back to Harry?s eyes and saw nothing but truth.
? Why you give me this? I asked him.
He blushed. He felt embarrassed whit the question like I shouldn?t ask.

? You?re my best friend. I don?t need this right know you know. My life is good, as normal as it gets. You lost your mother. And now you make your life miserable to help your father and your spoiled brother. It?s unfair. You deserve better, you deserve all this!
He smiled at me with all his sincerity and I couldn?t find any words to his kindness.
? Besides, he added. My father knows the formula, he always can make more. Even if he?d kill me if he knew that I know. Please take it and don?t tell anyone!
? How? how can I thank you?
? Just don?t thanks me yet. Who knows what can happen when you drink it.
? Wait, this isn?t safe?
? Now, he stood up. I have to go. Just on last thing, you might want to put the bottle in a place cold. It?s up to you if you want drink it all in a big body eruption or more discretely like one gulp per day or whatever. Just call me when you do it!

? You can?t just leave me with this!
? I just did, bye now!
And he ran away leaving his backpack at my feet. Inside, the bottle was surrounded by ice to maintain it cold. I had to quickly go home and put it in the fridge. I had no other cold place at home. It?s not like I had a secret laboratory under my bedroom.

When I got home, it was already dinner time. As expected, my father wasn?t there. He would arrive at two or three in the morning, depending on his shift. Not for a first, Eddy had dinner at some random friend. I felt relieved. Alone, I couldn?t put my mind out of the bottle.
?Ok, so I just take a little to taste tonight. But first I have to measure myself to know how powerful this is. I went to the bathroom with my notepad and pen:

Height: 1m78 (not so bad)
Weight: 58 kg (skinny as hell!)

I didn?t bother about the muscle size. I had none. I looked at my naked except underwear body; I had some hair on arms and legs but not much on torso. My beard was like a deforested? well, forest.

. I looked away from the mirror to put my clothes back and went to the kitchen again. I had dinner on my own. And for desert; there I was taking just one gulp of this strange and potentially killer potion. I felt nothing and taste was soft. I put back the bottle in the fridge in the most hided place possible. Then I went to bed. I didn?t even saw the note left on the fridge door:

?Hi Jack, I know you?re doing your best but? we?re out of milk. Help! Thanks, your dad that loves you!?


In the morning, I woke up in my bed and felt refreshed. I stretched out of the sheets and walked to the bathroom my pajama feeling odd. When my eyes spotted me on the mirror I couldn?t believe it! Just one gulp made me as big, if not bigger, as my brother. I inspected all my body. I couldn?t take my eyes out of my pecs, where I didn?t have any last night! They were round and defined. Visible under my shirt stretched in front of me. . But they weren?t the only ones that needed room. My shoulders were huge, supporting big arms contained in now painted skin sleeves. And my legs, they were filing entirely the pants. Good thing I was wearing an M. The amazement didn?t stop there. I took out my pajama and my hairy body hit me with surprise. It was dark and strong. The hair on my pecs was thick and connected to my beard throw my solid neck. And what a beard! I hadn?t noticed yet but my face was totally different. No more holes on my forest, it was like nature took all the space available on my skin. It was unbelievable. I took new measurements:

Height: 1m80
Weight: 76 f*cking kilos!

That was insane! My brother was 75kgs at his best right now. And pretty much the same height. Reach up to his league, yeah, and I could make me so much more! That?s when I remembered the bottle in the fridge. What time was it? Already 9:00! My father was gone for work, and Harry, Harry had a class at 8:30. Damned I ran down to the kitchen to make sure the bottle was untouched. But it was dry empty.

? No, NO NO! I screamed out. That?s when I read the note on the fridge. Did my father wrote the note last morning or did he write it today? If so, Eddy must have drunk it all when he came home last night. No it couldn?t be. I fell down in tears imagining my brother bigger than any man alive. A spoiled child transformed into a god. I created a monster!

Then I saw anther note that was on the ground:

?Hey douchebag, it?s been a day since dad told you about the milk. What?s up with that??

My brain made some time to react. It meant that Eddy did not drink the formula? but if one gulp made me like this, what was going to? ho my, Dad!

To be continued...

Hope you enjoyed, let me know!
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  #2   Add to iets21's Reputation   Report Post  
Old December 27th, 2013, 12:53 PM
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Awesome start up!! Can't wait for the next part, I wonder how it all will unfold

Keep up the good work
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  #3   Add to citizenies's Reputation   Report Post  
Old December 28th, 2013, 05:33 AM
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Still the beginning but, can't wait for more !!!
Wanna see more people growing =D
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  #4   Add to Kit Werecat's Reputation   Report Post  
Old December 29th, 2013, 12:49 PM
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A good start.

You are doing very well with your English, considering it isn't your native language. I wish I could do as well in a foreign language.

Can't wait to see dad, although I confess to a little disappointment that the story-teller got cheated out of growth himself. Dad's going to need some understanding company that is on his scale to get through things from here on.

Well Done, and keep up the good work!
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