Memberships and Motivations

[Demandred]

Hey guys,

After a really bizarre few weeks I've decided to share my little story on here. It seems like the best place to share them, with people who can appreciate where I'm coming from.

To round myself up, I'm a bit shy of 6ft and weigh about 10 stones. I don't know what that it in Kilos, maybe about 70 or so? Yeah, I'm one of those annoying guys who eats whatever he likes and doesn't put on weight.

My ex was a big guy. 16 stones of man, 6ft 4 or so. It was great. Long story short, when he dumped me a month ago I was pretty upset. Couldn't find the motivation to write, etc etc. But I was a "very nice person" so it was obviously ok. Since then he's been a bit of a dick, to be honest. Just bear with me, this is going somewhere...

On the last Tuesday of the month here it's the gay-friendly night. (If only it was always gay friendly, but you know what I mean). I'm not the going out type, but I went along and had a really great time. This is where I sound shallow and horrible. I was just with my friends, doing those awkward drunken dances which you can only master when pissed, when I had a good look around the room. My ex was there, dancing away. He ignored me all night, in a very dramatic kind of "walk into the toilets when he's there and just wash my hands and smirk" sort of way, but that's his problem. Then, as I looked to my right, there was two guys. I knew one of them, but the other... he had to be about my height, but he had a white top on which flaunted the fact that he uses the gym. Tight sleeves, stretched along the chest, painted over his broad shoulders. Seeing him there was the point I really realised that I hadn't lost anything at all.

More importantly though, it made me feel all reflective. Obviously I've always been interested in muscles, and this guy had them. I've always pondered at teh idea of getting fitter, being more physically attractive and so forth, but never done anything about it. I do martial arts a few times a week so I'm not unfit as such, but I don't have any definition and I don't like to take my top off. At the time, even though I'd been drinking, I knew things were going to change.

Today I went to the local gym. I signed up as a member, and I have a weights induction on Monday. I'm really apprehensive of it to be honest. When I went to the office to sign up, I peeked inside and was immediately worried. But I thought of this guy, in his tight top, and knew that it was something I would just have to deal with. I'm pretty sure the people there won't even pay me any attention, they'll be doing their own thing. The thing that surprised me the most was that I took my things along and went swimming for an hour. I haven't been since I was 15, and it was bizarre. I'm a barely average swimmer. The feeling of exercise isn't unfamiliar, but it felt really good. I realised it was a really big step, being able to go to the pool and not wear a top. Granted, I'm blind as a bat without my glasses, but still... as I was swimming, I knew that I wanted to get the same exhileration from other exercise. From the weight room.

I'll let you know how it goes. Any thoughts or advice would be appreciated. It feels like a huge step and I'm pretty geared up for it... I just hope my resolve doesn't waver.

[arpeejay]

A few things:

1. One stone = 14 lbs., so if you're 10 stone you weigh about 140 lbs.

2. One kilo = 2.2 lbs., so 140 lbs. is about 64 kg.

3. At 16 stone, your ex is about 224 lbs. or just about 100 kg. A big fella but at 6'4 it's not all that much.

Sorry to hear about the break up but sometimes (usually?) it's for the best. Getting back on the bicycle and pedaling is the right thing to do, even though you may feel like it's "shallow." It's worth remembering that there are other guys out there, guys who will be interested in you, and you've taken the first step.

Even better, you've joined a gym. Use the time you're NOT spending on a relationshp to work on yourself instead. Don't worry about the fact that you're not Mr. Universe -- no one is at the start! People are almost always happy to help out a newbie, especially if the newbie is actually paying attention and interested in learning. "Show me how..." and "Am I doing this the right way...?" are usually better lines than "how did you get big...?" or (worse!) "I don't want to get too big..."

The other thing to remember is that weight *training* isn't a sport, per se. Anyone can do it, regardless of athletic ability. The point is to build strength, muscle mass, and bone density, all of which promote balance and coordination (so at some point you may turn into your inner athlete!)

Take some pix for us NOW so that when you're HUGE we can look back and see how far you've come!

All the best & keep up the good work!

Richard

[brent]

The secrete to the gym is to go. Don't worry about what others think of you, they are too busy worrying about themselves... Also, all big guys were your size once. Just keep going until you ex is insanely jealous.

[CTeen]

Originally Posted by brent

The secrete to the gym is to go.

QFT!

Good luck to you and wish me luck as well!

[DaBigGuy1]

Originally Posted by arpeejay

A few things:

1. One stone = 14 lbs., so if you're 10 stone you weigh about 140 lbs.

2. One kilo = 2.2 lbs., so 140 lbs. is about 64 kg.

3. At 16 stone, your ex is about 224 lbs. or just about 100 kg. A big fella but at 6'4 it's not all that much.

Sorry to hear about the break up but sometimes (usually?) it's for the best. Getting back on the bicycle and pedaling is the right thing to do, even though you may feel like it's "shallow." It's worth remembering that there are other guys out there, guys who will be interested in you, and you've taken the first step.

Even better, you've joined a gym. Use the time you're NOT spending on a relationshp to work on yourself instead. Don't worry about the fact that you're not Mr. Universe -- no one is at the start! People are almost always happy to help out a newbie, especially if the newbie is actually paying attention and interested in learning. "Show me how..." and "Am I doing this the right way...?" are usually better lines than "how did you get big...?" or (worse!) "I don't want to get too big..."

The other thing to remember is that weight *training* isn't a sport, per se. Anyone can do it, regardless of athletic ability. The point is to build strength, muscle mass, and bone density, all of which promote balance and coordination (so at some point you may turn into your inner athlete!)

Take some pix for us NOW so that when you're HUGE we can look back and see how far you've come!

All the best & keep up the good work!

Richard

Very VERY well put, Richard!

And to the poster, do not "waver"......think of it as the best therapy that you can possibly give yourself and let it become a lifestyle of not only muscle building, but of health and peace of mind!

I know it (bodybuilding/weight training) has been a great source of accomplishment and therapy not just of body, but of mind to me for many many years.

Happy lifting~!

Ron III---III

[Demandred]

Thanks for the feedback guys! I've never thought of the gym as something anyone can do.

I had the induction earlier, looking at the weights room and the room with the treadmills, cycle machines, that sort of thing. When I looked around the weights room, to be honest, I was pretty unnerved. But then I remembered why I was there, and that I had just as much right to be as everyone else - I just didn't know my way around the place, that was all! After being shown the way machines work and learning gym etiquette as well, I figured I can go this week in the daytime when it's not so busy. It looks like a trial and error thing to see how much I can lift in order to get the most out of a workout, but I've not wavered so far.

I'm looking forward to the day I can walk in there and be confident with every piece of gym equipment. In the meantime I'm just going to have to get used to the place. I'm not worried about the other people there, more that I'll do something wrong and make myself look daft. Regardless, I'm excited to go and get lifting! I'll let you know how it goes.

[Demandred]

It's been a while now so I thought I'd post my experience on here, both to look back on in the future and for anyone who might be interested.

So, I had my induction. There was nothing to stop me from going to the gym whenever I wanted. However, with an upcoming holiday to Canada and America in which I would be camping, I decided to use the time before that to familiarise myself with the gym and get used to it. Then, when I got back, I would go to the gym and really start the working out.

This worked out for the best I think, as I had a very relaxing holiday and I didn't worry about what I ate. As it is, I think I actually lost a pound... it was also long enough for me to research gym etiquette, what to eat, how often to work out, that sort of thing. I've picked it up over the last few years from sites like this, but now I was applying it to myself and I wanted to do it right - or as right as possible for a newcomer to the gym.

My first workout was terrifying until I actually entered the gym. On the way there I was nervous, and when I paid and got changed I was trying to think of ways to get out of working out. I had to remind myself I was there for a reason, and with a deep breath I went in.

It was great! I really enjoyed it. Since then I've been back a few times. I've made a chart and put it on my wall to show when I'm going. I've opted for a Monday - Thursday - Saturday approach. They seem to be the best days for me, and inbetween I have my martial arts stuff which works like a cardio. I think. I don't pretend to know enough to be an expert, far from it, but I've been picking things up as I go along and I recently got some protein shake mix which should help.

Best of all, I feel much better about myself. A few weeks ago I even found myself wanting to write again, so my MG stories are no longer on hold. This was a really big deal for me after months of being too jaded to think outside the self-pity box. I'm a little bitter, but thankfully my main motivation to go to the gym now is to look after myself and make myself feel good. Which it does.

That's it so far really! I've taken a "before" picture, so when I've made significant progress I'll post a before/after thing. I have a small shirt which I want to become, at the very least, rather snug on me. That's my goal though I don't know how long that will take!

[arpeejay]

Great post, Demandred!

Just keep going and you'll be Mr. Stud in NO time!

xoxo

Richard