The Roommate, Part XXII

[Xyggurat]

Greetings, Readerlings!

I felt that last night's update was unforgivably short after such an absence. So, while I was supposed to be getting ready for the Superbowl, I was instead doing bad things at my computer.

This is another story chapter, and possibly the penultimate. Expect the next one to be... uhm, long.

-X-

[Xyggurat]

Breath was torn out of my lungs by my pounding heart as I ran. It didn't seem that I could breathe fast enough to support the needs of my smaller body. This had seemed like such a good idea at first: incapacitate Phil, make a run for Liam's office, and set our final plan into motion. It was so simple, and everything would go back to normal again. Well, maybe not precisely normal: I was going to kick Phil's ass with every ounce of my returned strength.

Around the time I sprinted past Dane's room, my strength began to flag and breath started to become more and more difficult. Phil's cries--which had been demoniac, basso shrieks that rumbled in my chest with their fury--had long since stopped, and I swore I could hear him running after me.

I noticed that Dane's room was cracked open, but he could be no help to me now. I wasn't even sure that he would help me if I begged. No, there was no salvation there. All I could do was go forward. Gritting my teeth, I pushed myself to race harder.

Before I knew it, I was bounding up the steps leading to the upper campus. If I had thought that flat ground was difficult to run on, the stairs were torture. Still unused to shorter legs, I tripped occasionally on the stairs. Nonetheless, I was a man driven. Scrapes on my shins could not hamper me, nor could losing a shoe after a particularly painful stumble on the top step. Pain--awareness of everything, really--began to fade from my mind as I sprinted through the science building. My sight was just a red wash, and I felt cold all over. I could barely see Liam's office door through my clouded vision.

Somehow, I must have managed to slam a hand into the door, because I could feel myself being led inside by warm hands. Liam said something, and instantly my exhaustion began to recede. My head continued ringing, as if I were recovering from a major headache.

Liam was speaking, quickly, as my thoughts came back into focus. "...so I think it's at it's weakest now."

"Wait, what?" My voice sounded like gravel in my throat.

"We might already be moving out of the weakness stage, Dane. Every second counts."

I shook my head and held up a shaky hand. "Start at the beginning. Tell me everything, Liam."

His green eyes bored into mine for a moment. He was wearing his natural form, with its bulkier musculature and coarse dark hair. I instantly decided that I preferred its honesty over the artificial perfection of his more common face. Even my affection for him would not dissuade me, however. I forced steel into my gaze. A trickle of sweat dripped into my eyes, but I continued meeting his stare.

"Okay. But we're running out of time." With that warning offered, he began, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before, Dane, but the symbiote may have already reproduced."

I raised a hand to cover my mouth. No words came to my tongue or mind. "Why?"

"I found out a few days ago that the reproduction cycle was much shorter than I'd assumed. Phil's symbiote is as different from mine as a lower primate is from human beings. Genetically similar, but beyond that... well, the differences are obvious. Somehow, it's some sort of an atavus." At my evident lack of understanding, he offered, "A throwback."

"Why didn't you tell me?" It came out as less than a whisper, muffled by my hand.

He glanced away, now unwilling to meet my stare. "I've become very fond of you as a friend, Dane. Neither of us could have stopped this, short of killing Phil, and even then the symbiote would just find another host. I refuse to take a life. The symbiote is weaker after spawning. I can give you a drug that, when delivered to the symbiote, will flag it to the host's immune system. It'll cause the two to become incompatible. And... after that, I might be able to restore you."

The 'might' did not even faze me at this point. I held my hand over my mouth tightly. Otherwise, I would have used it to hit him. He had rationalized away a solution to this entire problem, and all to save me. I don't know who I hated more: him for his deed, or me for my gratitude.

"All right," I rasped, tears in my eyes. "Give me the drug."

I was numb. My head was still tingling. The syringe that he injected into my arm was filled with a translucent crystal-blue fluid. It stung a bit, but no more than any other injection.

Liam put the syringe down and placed his hands on my shoulders. I jerked my head away.

"There was nothing we could do, Dane."

I sighed. Whatever I was about to say was driven out of my mind by a sudden flaring of pain in the center of my skull. I felt a searing sensation deep within my brain, rippling out to sway the world around me.

"Are you all right?" Liam's voice sounded frantic.

I looked up at him from the floor, wondering how I had got there, but I did not inquire about my state. Instead--and I did not know why--I just announced, "Dane's coming."

The words hung in the air for a few sick seconds before the first loud bangs on the door begin. Phil's voice sounded from the other side.

"I can feel you in there, Dane."

Liam did not wait for anything so crude as Phil bursting down the door. He strode to it and threw it open, skin and hair seguing into different shades even as he moved. Phil stood in the hallway, his polo shirt torn in a dozen places from his exertions, revealing patches of taut golden skin beneath. It was plastered to his musculature by the same sweat that slicked his hair into a fierce arc. The ruddy golden locks coiled over his brow, framing the fury in his wintery eyes.

"What the hell do you think you're doing in my office?" Liam growled. He was back in his false form, his tenor voice booming with authority.

"I'm here for him. Feel like standing aside, little man?"

"A world of 'no,'" Liam responded. The skin around his eyes tightened. It was the only warning as his body sprang into action, throwing a punch directly into Phil's chest.

He went flying. I was shocked at the sight: Liam's body did not look capable of such power, but he had control over his body in a way that Phil did not. My roommate was stunned, lying there on the ground. His muscles sprung into relief against the fabric of his polo shirt as he pushed up off of his chest. His pectorals formed a deep valley as they swelled against the cloth.

Liam stared at him and ordered, "Stay down."

As if they were turned to water, Phil's arms buckled underneath him, knocked out from under him by Liam's command. It did not, however, take him long to begin trying again. When Liam repeated his order, Phil shook for a moment, but continued rising with inexorable slowness.

Once again on his feet, Phil stared Liam down and commanded, "Die."

Liam rolled his eyes. "How about not? You have no power over me, Phillip, and anything that attempt against--"

He was too slow to stop Phil's next charge, which carried the two of them back into the office and crashing into Liam's computer desk. They went down in a series of sparks and flares, and I heard Liam groan in pain over the crackle of breaking wood and glass and twisting metal. He had taken most of the force of the blow, and did not rise as Phil did. All he had for his exertions was a cut on his brow. Liam looked deathly pale, a wound to his scalp sending blood washing down his face.

Phil moved around the desk's wreckage until he was again framed by the doorway. Light shone around him, and he looked like an avenging angel with his head wound dripping crimson onto his shirt. I was trapped, pushing myself back against the nearest wall as if I could somehow hide within it.

He began to advance toward me at a halting pace. Maybe the wound had dizzied him more than I thought.

"I don't think you understand," Phil growled at me. His voice rumbled through my bones. "No matter what anyone says or does, I own you. And there's nothing that anyone can do to save you now, Dane."

A clanging sound, metal against bone, sounded from behind Phil. It took a moment for me to realize that it *was* Phil. At least, partially. He swayed for a moment, surprise rising in his gaze, and then crumpled.

"Wow, color *you* wrong," said Christian's silhouette, standing with a fire extinguisher held overhead.

[skumbum]

Woot, thanks for the updates. Exciting and engrossing as usual.

Was a little confused though, were both Christian and Phil accidentally called "Dane" at some point in Part XXII?

[theseventhwave]

Ah Xyggurat,

Thank you very much for your diligence (two chapters - yay!).

You know just how to make me happy.....and horny!

The pace of the story (and the pace of the chapters) is exhilarating!

Although I completely understand your desire to have this story wrapped up - (you've been working on it for over a year - and if you copy and paste all of the chapters into a Word document, it's 65 pages long) - please understand that your excited, anxious and devoted fans LOVE this story and don't want you to "force" it to end prematurely.

Thanks for all of the hard work (pun intended) - and please keep writing!
Your fan for life,
Justin

[sexiscriptor]

Hmm...how best to phrase my awe and gratefulness....
Perhaps as "This series had better have a part 30 in it!" (hah. get it? XXX? yeah...)
Anyway, I don't want this to end, man! This is great! And hot...
Only thing to note: I believe skumbum is most certainly right about the whole "Dane" thing...For me, having not read any new additions to this story line in a while {AHEM}, it was a bit confusing.
But the series as a whole is very solid, congratulations. Perhaps someday, as a writer, you may wish to look through it and tinker with it, but I, as a reader and writer, don't think it's absolutely necessary, although I wouldn't discourage your writerly intentions whatever they may be.
Good work, keep at it!

[theseventhwave]

You're watching the Superbowl!?!??!?!?!?!!?!

Ummmmmmmm...........

I thought those "hockey people" were on strike?

(heeheehee)

[Xyggurat]

Originally Posted by skumbum

Woot, thanks for the updates. Exciting and engrossing as usual.

Was a little confused though, were both Christian and Phil accidentally called "Dane" at some point in Part XXII?

I almost certainly screwed up. As soon as I glanced at my watch and realized that I not only had to cook but set up party stuff and clean the apartment before people got here, I started trying to hurry.

I'm looking to edit this chapter--and all of the chapters, actually--into a final form as a repost at the end of the story. Because of the way I write (and moreover because I'm too creatively spent to edit at the end of writing) I've noticed a number of such misspellings, miswordings, etc. in the tale.

So... yeah, just fill it in mentally for now, I'll get to work on the revisions shortly!

-X-

[Kymuscleboy]

Thank you so much for these most recent chapters. They surely made my weekend.


I don't know how it would work in with your plan for the story, but I for one would like to see Phil have another round of growth and become the "big man on campus"...before getting his comeuppence.

However you decide to finish it, I am really looking forward to more.

[skumbum]

Originally Posted by Kymuscleboy

Thank you so much for these most recent chapters. They surely made my weekend.
...
However you decide to finish it, I am really looking forward to more.

Same here, typos or not

[Xyggurat]

I've got to admit, I'm raring and ready to start up a new series. I'll probably do a series of shorter stories based on member requests after this, as long as I feel they're stimulating enough to write.

If you all have thoughts on improvements in my next tales, send 'em through private messages, mail, or post them here. I only ask because I've noticed a definite decrease in readership over the last year, but perhaps that's just the curse of too much continuity: with a single short story, people will take generally take a peek at it just because they see it there, but multiple chapters open you to problems. Readers can decide at any point that they're not so in to a storyline, new readers are daunted by lack of familiarity with the tale, and especially in eroticism, most people don't want story: they want fast resolution.

True, I only judge this stuff by the number of views on each post, but it seems like these last two chapters have had very low response. I'm definitely not feeling unloved or anything; just approaching this from an analytical view.

(It's why shows like 'Angel' and 'Deep Space Nine' don't do well while Law & Order has such a following despite its multiple incarnations and years of combined air-time.)

Yeah, I'm rambling.

Anyway, if any of you have thoughts on maintaining interest next time, lemme know.

-X-

[Kyrosan]

I'm thinking maybe it's because all of the chapters are scattered across several threads. I liked your idea of joining all the chapters into one big post.

[unstud]

i wouldn't worry too much about the low views so far -- personally, i felt like things were slowing down around here, and as such, haven't been checking in as often. so it seems like most of your adoring and loyal fans might take some time to trickle back in. the last two chapters were totally great, so you shouldn't waste your time worrying about it!

[orange_bean]

Looking forward to the rest, have enjoyed the story very much so far!

Keep up the high level of quality!

---Chris

[skumbum]

Originally Posted by Xyggurat

True, I only judge this stuff by the number of views on each post, but it seems like these last two chapters have had very low response. I'm definitely not feeling unloved or anything; just approaching this from an analytical view.

(It's why shows like 'Angel' and 'Deep Space Nine' don't do well while Law & Order has such a following despite its multiple incarnations and years of combined air-time.)

Yeah, I'm rambling.

Anyway, if any of you have thoughts on maintaining interest next time, lemme know.

-X-

This *is* the highest possible interest level, seems hard to beat.
Then again, I watched all the DS9's too.

[otkuman2003]

great story. read it entirely many times...keep it up Xygguratm cant wait for the conclusion,

[Mad Dog]

Not really about the story, I just wanted to say that I really love Angel and Deep Space 9. Am watching Battlestar Galactica!

[theseventhwave]

Xyggurat,

I had to post a reply to this thread for two reasons:

1. There have been a lot of new postings as of late (yay!) and hence the last two chapters of "The Roommate" have been (gasp!) pushed down the page rather quickly. For those of you who might have missed chapters 21 and 22 - get reading! This series is climaxing! (pun intended)

2. In one of your replies to your fans, you wrote the following:

QUOTE

I've noticed a definite decrease in readership over the last year, but perhaps that's just the curse of too much continuity: with a single short story, people will take generally take a peek at it just because they see it there, but multiple chapters open you to problems. Readers can decide at any point that they're not so in to a storyline, new readers are daunted by lack of familiarity with the tale, and especially in eroticism, most people don't want story: they want fast resolution.

True, I only judge this stuff by the number of views on each post, but it seems like these last two chapters have had very low response. I'm definitely not feeling unloved or anything; just approaching this from an analytical view.

(It's why shows like 'Angel' and 'Deep Space Nine' don't do well while Law & Order has such a following despite its multiple incarnations and years of combined air-time.)

END QUOTE

Where to start? Hmmmm...I love DS9. Good stories are good stories. The development of the characters as "people" makes the other stuff (be it the sci-fi future of DS9 or the fantasy of "The Roommate") all the more interesting, exhilarating, and real. "The Roommate" is an excellent series due to the development of Dane as an individual (we feel Dane) and the palpable psycho-sexual tension between Dane and Phil as they undergo their physical juxtaposition. (mmmm...I'm getting hot just thinking about it...) This careful and thoughtful character development makes the hot sex and muscle growth all the better. Further, this could not be accomplished within a single chapter story ("The Roommate" is currently a 65 page Word document).

I am certainly looking forward to everything you write (short or long) but please don't feel as if the longer stories are not appreciated.

In the above quote, you also mentioned the "number of views on each post" - this SHOULD be a source of great pride for you - chapter 19 has over 4,100 views and chapter 20 has over 4,600 views - these are among the highest on this site. This should indicate to you that there are a LOT of people who have been silently enjoying this series. So stop kicking yourself and get back to writing.

Please tell me (all of us) that you are working on the next chapter! I would love to know what happens next.

Your fan for life,
Justin ;-)

[skumbum]

Originally Posted by Xyggurat

"Okay. But we're running out of time." With that warning offered, he began, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before, Dane, but the symbiote may have already reproduced."

I raised a hand to cover my mouth. No words came to my tongue or mind. "Why?"

"I found out a few days ago that the reproduction cycle was much shorter than I'd assumed. Phil's symbiote is as different from mine as a lower primate is from human beings. Genetically similar, but beyond that... well, the differences are obvious. Somehow, it's some sort of an atavus." At my evident lack of understanding, he offered, "A throwback."

"Why didn't you tell me?" It came out as less than a whisper, muffled by my hand.

He glanced away, now unwilling to meet my stare. "I've become very fond of you as a friend, Dane. Neither of us could have stopped this, short of killing Phil, and even then the symbiote would just find another host. I refuse to take a life. The symbiote is weaker after spawning. I can give you a drug that, when delivered to the symbiote, will flag it to the host's immune system. It'll cause the two to become incompatible. And... after that, I might be able to restore you."

The 'might' did not even faze me at this point. I held my hand over my mouth tightly. Otherwise, I would have used it to hit him. He had rationalized away a solution to this entire problem, and all to save me. I don't know who I hated more: him for his deed, or me for my gratitude.

"All right," I rasped, tears in my eyes. "Give me the drug."

I was numb. My head was still tingling. The syringe that he injected into my arm was filled with a translucent crystal-blue fluid. It stung a bit, but no more than any other injection.

Liam put the syringe down and placed his hands on my shoulders. I jerked my head away.

"There was nothing we could do, Dane."

Reading comprehension was never my strong point... I just realized I don't necessarily understand what's going on in this section. Can someone help me out?

Is Dane panicking at the thought off the symbiote having reproduced?

The 'might' did not even faze me at this point. I held my hand over my mouth tightly. Otherwise, I would have used it to hit him. He had rationalized away a solution to this entire problem, and all to save me. I don't know who I hated more: him for his deed, or me for my gratitude.

What's going on in this paragraph?

"There was nothing we could do, Dane."

Is he still talking about the symbiote's reproduction, or does he saying that the drug will kill Phil, or ...


On with Part XXIII.. Yay Xyg!

[orange_bean]

This is such an interesting story that it's fun to theorize about what's going to happen. It seems to me that Liam's wording is intentionally vague, but he may be hinting that Dane has had a symbiote of his own. It would explain why he could affect people other than Phil from nearly the beginning, just as Phil has implied that his semen can diminish people other than Dane.

My guess is that the drug Liam gave to Dane has hurt or killed the symbiote that was living in him, and he may be apologizing for that, or for taking so long to do it, or for doing it without explaining that was what was going on.

I can't wait to see how it ends.

---Chris

[Xyggurat]

I only have a moment, so I can't be absolutely sure if I'm offering the correct reply here, but from skimming...

I guess your question is why Dane is horrified at Liam.

Dane doesn't have a symbiote of his own. His own unique situation is solely due to physical changes that Phil has wrought on him. Dane's horrified because Liam may have let Phil's symbiote reproduce and didn't tell him.

While we, as fans of muscle growth, might consider a whole ton of symbiotes to be neat or erotic, think of the ramifications to Dane's world. If one crazy guy like Phil could wreak havoc like he has, think of what its offspring would do.

I have to apologize for the lack of clarity there; it's one of my problems when writing. I hate it when writers assume that people will 'get' things they think are clever but not fully fleshed in the text, and then I do it myself!

-X-

[orange_bean]

Ah, okay. See, these are the kinds of problems you'll only get when you try to write a story that has actual depth and an interesting reason behind the transformation. This kind of speculation comes only from reading attentively and being warpped-up in the story. I'm sure we all enjoy it even if we don't "get it" about all the details.

No criticism was intended. My regard for your story is very high, and I remain excited while awaiting the conclusion!

[theseventhwave]

Orange Bean wrote:

these are the kinds of problems you'll only get when you try to write a story that has actual depth and an interesting reason behind the transformation. This kind of speculation comes only from reading attentively and being warpped-up in the story.


I completely agree!


Orange Bean also wrote:

This is such an interesting story that it's fun to theorize about what's going to happen.

Apparently, O.B.'s been reading my mind. This story is so engaging that each chapter sets my imagination on fire - I can't wait to find out what happens next - and my imagination runs rampant with possibilities.

Yes, chapter 22 (particularly what Liam was trying to explain) was not completely clear. However, a good story will throw out partial details and keep them in the air for a while to increase reader interest. I just assumed that chapter 23 (or 24, or 25...) would fill in the missing information and then we'd be able to look back on "good ole 22" and say "a-ha!"

Xyggurat - please keep going.

[skumbum]

Originally Posted by theseventhwave

Xyggurat - please keep going.

Yes .

[Pagemaster_B]

You know, Spring Break is coming up (at least for Oregon it is), and since most people don't have school or such, wouldn't it be nice for you to finish this story?

[orange_bean]

Originally Posted by Pagemaster_B

wouldn't it be nice for you to finish this story?

Remember to say "please"

[theseventhwave]

Originally Posted by orange_bean

Remember to say "please"

[COLOR=Red]PLLLEEEEAAASSSSEEE!!![/COLOR]

[Pagemaster_B]

When using the Weapon of Guilt-Trip, you don't say "please." It's a woman's--excuse me--mother's most fearful manipulation tool.

[Xyggurat]

Originally Posted by Pagemaster_B

When using the Weapon of Guilt-Trip, you don't say "please." It's a woman's--excuse me--mother's most fearful manipulation tool.

Haha. I love you guys.

Sadly, no updates to The Roommate this week...

I might have some time next Wednesday at the earliest.

-X-

[theseventhwave]

[COLOR=Yellow]Yoo Hoo! [/COLOR]

[COLOR=Magenta]Sup dude? [/COLOR]

[COLOR=DeepSkyBlue]Aren't you dying to find out what happens next? [/COLOR] [COLOR=DeepSkyBlue](I am)[/COLOR]

[COLOR=Red]Xyggurat - even with the lllloooooonnnnngggg lapse between chapters, my anticipation is not diminishing.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=Lime]And Xyggurat... it's hard to wait this long... so very very hard.....[/COLOR]

[skumbum]

It *is* next wednesday, after all...