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 April 12th, 2012, 11:58 AM | |||
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| I Hate Bodybuilders This story has been removed by the author. Last edited by R Chris Cooper; September 18th, 2012 at 07:44 AM.     |
| April 12th, 2012, 01:58 PM | |||
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| Great start! |
| April 12th, 2012, 02:20 PM | |||
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| Great story as always. Like the two person perspective going back and forth. Hope you continue on |
| April 12th, 2012, 03:59 PM | |||
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| Oh please continue Coop, I am dying to see where this goes. A perfect start to what will be a great story! |
| April 12th, 2012, 05:00 PM | |||
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| Quote:
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| April 12th, 2012, 06:31 PM | |||
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| Is that true about cold after a workout, btw? |
| April 12th, 2012, 08:12 PM | |||
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| I love the story and that weird bond the two have so far. |
| April 12th, 2012, 11:03 PM | |||
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| Quote:
I have part of the next part written. Did you have some suggestions? Maybe i can work them in. Coop |
| April 13th, 2012, 07:03 AM | |||
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| Quote:
1. Have the newbie make the cross over into "accepted" and then, after set backs and delays, into "serious". 2. Make the narrator a bit more conflicted. Have him shrug off his insights as to why he is showing off for this one guy, and have him return to his "lone wolf" status consciously. Unconsciously, he should continue to show off, become more and more blatant for the Newbie. 3. When the newbie becomes "accepted" have the narrator be still stand offish and a holdout to completely welcoming the new guy. Have him continue to semi-support, semi-bait the new guy, until one day the new guy helps him out, unexpectedly. Maybe the narrator is showing off with a weight that is too heavy for him to bench and he gets the bar stuck on his chest when he thinks no one else is there. Have the newbie, who is still watching him from the shadows, come and save him. 4. After that, have them lift together, grow together, and, well.... the usual "other stuff" in an R Chris Cooper story..... Great writing! Very evocative personalities in a minimum of words. They really come alive in the interior monologues! Mdlftr |
| April 13th, 2012, 11:23 AM | |||
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| Excellent start. Very original. |
| April 13th, 2012, 02:22 PM | |||
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| A great demonstration of how chemistry sometimes blows "what we THINK we want" or "don't want" out of the water. I'm a big fan of different perspectives on the same occurances and how a character's filtering almost tells a different story. Looking forward to more! |
| April 13th, 2012, 11:52 PM | |||
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| Staring at one another in the mirrors on the gym walls and then smiling back! It's an odd gym etiquette that you could be doing a given exercise right next to someone and it's okay to stare via the mirror but not directly. And then when you have a workout partner or friend, you stare directly and skip the mirrors (which adds distance). Opening up a beer bottle against a flexed forearm is always a good bit of business, subtle and quick. Taking a FAT Sharpie brand maker and writing a Post-It-Note and then casually taking the maker top and placing it back but pushing it against a hard conditioned pec until is "snaps" closed. You know, so the other hand can be otherwise occupied at the time! R. Chris Cooper stories are great! |
| April 21st, 2012, 12:46 AM | |||
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| my GOD - another masterpiece of you!!!! I have to read the next part... |
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