The Human Ideal Reposted

[V.R.Goh]

Alright, let's try this again.

The Human Ideal

Chapter 1
To this day, I bone up every time I remember what had happened that day last year. Before it happened, women wouldn?t give me the time of day in a clock shop. Now, they can barely keep their hands off of me and my friends. Of course if you?ve seen us lately, you wouldn?t blame them for getting nigh-orgasmic at the four of us.

When I stare into a mirror, I can't help but flex my 25" biceps that peak like Mount Everest and are just as hard. When I flex my pecs, which already look like slabs of granite, it's enough to make women and gay men moan in ecstasy. My lifeguard shoulders and my wing-like lats give me the silhouette of a cobra's flared hood which taper to my 30" rock-hard waist. My eight-pack abs, even when unflexed, would make a cobblestone street proud. My tree-trunk legs are as big around as my waist, if not more so, and my calves are as hard as the diamonds they're shaped like. Just thinking about all of this has my 12" soft cut dick rising to his full length of 18 rock-hard inches of cock that would make a horse jealous. If that?s not enough, there are three more devastatingly gorgeous hunks next to me that can make a woman moan with a smile and orgasm by flexing their armor-plated physique. Before I cum all over my computer at my 6'2" tall, 265 pound bodybuilder's physique and my underwear model looks, let me tell you all about it, but I have to warn you. It will sound unbelievable, but it?s absolutely true.

First, I?ll introduce us. My name?s Omar. My friends and I form an acapella group called Orpheus, named after the legendary singer of Greek myth. I?m the skinny light-skinned brother with the glasses. I?m 5?9?, which would be fine if I wasn?t 120 pounds soaking wet. The bright side is I have very little body fat, so I can get a six-pack with no problem. My martial arts training keeps me trim, but it?s hard for me to gain muscle with such a high metabolism.

The guy with the flaming red hair is Connor. He?s an inch shorter than me and kind of pudgy at about 145 pounds, but he claims to have a dick that?s a full 12 inches long. We usually tell him that he?s being cocky, pun intended. He tries to charm the ladies with an affected Irish accent, but it always comes out sounding ridiculous, especially when he?s dancing on the table with a lampshade on his head. Irishmen don?t get drunk, my ass.

Adrian is the big Polynesian baritone with the tribal tattoo around his right upper arm. He?s 6?2" tall and 245 pounds of muscle, but he can?t get washboard abs to save his life. He played football in high school and college, but he still keeps in shape. As you can probably tell by his physique, he was a linebacker. His last date said that she liked his rugged good looks, but I think she just liked the size of his biceps.

Finally there?s Nick, the pretty-boy at the far end. Girls like him for his good looks, but he?s only 5?5? tall. Last I checked guys that were shorter than the girls in the club rarely got any play. He?s the one that picked out the name for our group. He was always fond of Greek myths, being Greek himself. When we decided on a name for ourselves, choosing the name of the legendary singer from ancient Greece just made sense.

We met in elementary school, where we were in the same class. If it weren?t for our different appearances, people would think we?re brothers. We were that inseparable. By junior high, we had found our way onto the school choir. We continued singing well into high school and all through college. After we graduated we decided to keep singing, and thus the acapella group Orpheus was born.

One day after rehearsal, we sat around in my apartment. Connor was over by the shelf looking at the pictures and the other stuff I got from my parents. My father is an archaeologist, so I rarely see him. He always sends me weird items from his digs, along with notes about what they are. Mom died of lung cancer from smoking cigarettes when I was about 5. To this day, I don?t let anyone smoke around me.

?Hey, O. Come here for a minute,? Connor said over his shoulder. I walked up behind him, followed by the others.

?What?s up?? I asked him. Connor held up a brass torque with a spiral pattern. It was open at one end, and had a ram?s head at each end of it. There were runes etched into the inside of the armband.

?Any idea what this is?? he asked.

?According to my father, that's from Norway,? I responded. ?I?d have to look at his notes to tell you more.?

?Maybe it?ll help you pack on some muscle,? Adrian said with a smirk. ?Girls don?t like rail-thin singers.?

?Ha-ha, smart ass,? I said to him. Since it was late, the guys decided to head home early. Connor had made me curious as to what the torque was. So I decided to look through Dad?s notes in the morning since I was so tired.

That night, I had a strange dream. I saw the four of us, only we were naked. We were also changing. Connor, Nick and I were growing to match Adrian's height and muscle, while Adrian, Connor, and Nick were all gaining rock-hard eight-pack abs. Adrian, Nick and I were gaining inches in our dick to match Connor's rock-hard flesh sword. Adrian's, Connor's and my facial features were improving to the point that we all looked like models. In short, my dream showed the four of us as the human ideal. Little did I know how close I was to that goal.

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In case you don't know, a torque is an armband that fits around the bicep. Comments are welcome.

[V.R.Goh]

Someone help me out here. When I paste the story it looks fine, with paragraphs and everything, but when I post it, it looks like what you see above. Any tips on what I should do? What am I doing wrong or not doing at all?

[redkage]

umm, perhaps after you post it, you can press enter once at the end of each paragraph, just in case. and you can edit your posts so you don't need to make a whole new thread.

btw, what type document are you using?

[V.R.Goh]

I'm writing the story in Microsoft Word. I tried pasting it into Notepad, but it comes out the same way, even when I add an empty line between the paragraphs.

[Ender]

What I do in Word is put two returns at the ends of the paragraphs, that seem to break them up. Then I go back and reedit the pasted text to make it look better... the edit function here seems to scrub text to remove consecutive spaces and you'll need to play with hyphenation at times...

Ender

[rextorres]

Use the "Advanced" button and then "Preview Post" button to view the way the message looks before you submit the message for posting!

Maybe that helps!


It'll look like:

The Human Ideal

Chapter 1

To this day, I bone up every time I remember what had happened that day last year. Before it happened, women wouldn?t give me the time of day in a clock shop. Now, they can barely keep their hands off of me and my friends.

When I stare into a mirror, I can't help but flex my 25" biceps that peak like Mount Everest and are just as hard. When I flex my pecs, which already look like slabs of granite, it's enough to make women and gay men moan in ecstasy. My lifeguard shoulders and my wing-like lats give me the silhouette of a cobra's flared hood which taper to my 30" rock-hard waist.

etc....

[V.R.Goh]

Finally figured it out. Thanks for all the help, everyone.

[TheMM]

And. That. Is. Right!

Now then, constructive critism time!

Personally, I think it's not a bad idea. The things that could use work is the speed you're going at this. You kinda used up your "freebie" plot devices a bit early. Try adding a bit more detail to each character, not just quickly go through them. Maybe add how they met or why they named their group after a Greek singer.

A paragraph on each of those seperately and IMO, this story will be pretty damn good. Not sayin it ain't already though.

[V.R.Goh]

I'm probably gonna end up editing this story's chapters constantly until I finish it. For you astrology buffs: I'm a Virgo, 'nuff said.