The Orphanage (part 4) Rob

[Jaypat]

WHAM! Rob sat up straight in bed. What the fuck was that? For an instant he wasn’t sure if he’d actually heard something or if it had just been part of a dream. Then there was an earth shattering KA WOMP and everything in his room shook. His alarm clock toppled over, his body building books and magazines fell off shelves, and his soccer ball came bouncing toward him across the room.

What the fuck? That was an earthquake, except there weren’t any earthquakes around here. He hopped out of bed and noticed that his bed had shifted at least a foot across the floor. What the fuck was going on? Suddenly he heard shouting coming from the front lawn. He ran to his window and looked out. Holy fucking crap! There was a fucking giant out on the front lawn and he was completely naked. The guy had to be well over ten feet tall and at least six feet wide at the shoulders. He had biceps like wrecking balls, massive boulder-like shoulders and his thighs looked like they were each bigger than Rob’s entire body. Rob watched opened mouth as the giant took out six guards with one punch and then sprinted to the wall. He knocked a large section of it down with just his fists, and then disappeared through the gap and into the woods. Fuck! What was that?

He raced out into the hall, dressed only in his boxers and t shirt, and almost instantly ran into Todd.

“What the fuck was that?” asked Todd. “Did you feel that?”

“Hell yes. Did you see that guy on the lawn?”

“What guy?”

“There was a huge guy on the front lawn.”

“Seriously?”

And then a dozen doors opened and they were surrounded by guys, all lumbering around in their sleep ware, all looking confused and a little scared, all asking each other if they knew what had happened. It was starting to get pretty noisy. Rob couldn’t allow that. He was the second floor supervisor and it was part of his job to keep order on his floor.

“Everybody back to your rooms,” ordered Rob.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me?” said Eric Kowalski.

“Maybe you forgot there’s a curfew on,” said Rob.

There was a chorus of protests, but Rob cut them off quickly. “Don’t worry. I’ll go downstairs, find out what happened and then let you all know. But for now, just go back to your rooms, please.”

Rob usually got them to listen to him. A five foot eleven, he was the tallest guy on the floor. He wasn’t very bulky, but that wasn’t his fault. The Orphanage had no gym. He had been lobbying for them to install one, but he wasn’t getting anywhere. They kept telling him it wasn’t in the budget.

“How about a weight bench and some weights? They’re not too expensive,” he had argued. But they wouldn’t budge. Instead they got him a book on army calisthenics and told him to do sit ups and push ups. He did; and he also took up jogging around the country-side but it wasn’t the same. He wanted to put on some muscle, and to really do that, you needed weights.

But he was still big enough to command respect on his floor. The side effect of him not being able to get big was that no one else could either. He and Brad, the third floor supervisor, were about as big as anyone around there got.

The guys all mumbled as they shuffled back to their rooms. But they did shuffle back to their rooms, all except Todd.

“You too, man.”

“No fucking way. I’m coming with you.”

“There’s a curfew on.”

“Fuck the curfew; there some serious shit going on; and I’m not going back to my room until I find out what it is.”

Rob briefly considered arguing with Todd but from experience he knew that would be a long and drawn out process. And trying to intimidate Todd wouldn’t work either. The guy wasn’t much smaller than he was and if he tried playing the size card, they would probably end up in a fist fight. It just wasn’t worth it. All he really wanted to do was find out what was going on and then get back to bed. “Ok, fine; come.”

The two of the proceeded down the stairs to the front hall.

“Holy fucking crap, would you look at that?” said Todd. Rob looked over and where the front door used to be was a huge hole in the wall, at least seven feet wide and twelve feet tall. The remains of the door frame along with some pieces of the wall were scattered in little bits across the front hall.

“What the fuck could have done that?” asked Todd.

“I don’t know,” answered Rob “Where is everyone?” The place seemed completely deserted. Rob tried the administration office door. It was locked. He knocked. No answer. He tried Mr. Gibbons’ office. Locked. No answer. He tried the lab door. He was almost surprised when it creaked open.

“Kevin!” shouted Rob. “What the fuck are you dong here?”

The chubby boy in the lab jumped, almost upsetting a tray of little bottles beside him. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Rob and Todd.

“Jesus, Rob, you scared the shit out of me,” said Kevin.

“Kevin, you’re not supposed to be here. Go back to your room.”

Kevin laughed. There was something unsettling about his laugh. Something about it wasn’t completely sane. “Cut the crap, Rob. We’ve moved a little beyond the whole dorm supervisor vs. errant orphan game. It doesn’t mean a hell of a lot anymore.”

“I know you’re not on my floor, but—“

“Not on your floor?” interrupted Kevin, before exploding into more of that creepy laughter. “Get a fucking clue. Did you see the front hall?”

“You saw what happened?” asked Rob.

“Oh yeah.”

“And the giant? Did you see him?”

“Oh yeah, I saw him all right.”

“And?”

“We’re all fucked, all of us.”

“You’re going to have to do better than that if you want to get out of this one.”

“If I want to get out?” Kevin laughed again. “There’s no way out. Not for me, not for any of us… except maybe Caleb. He still has a chance.”

“Are you going to start making sense anytime soon?”

“They’re fucking with our genes, dude. What do you think all this… crap is for?” asked Kevin waving his arms around the lab.

Rob looked around at the lab. He never really liked the place, but he couldn’t imagine it was anything as sinister as Kevin was claiming. “I don’t believe you.”

“Of course, you don’t. If I were you, I wouldn’t believe me either, but I tell you what; Mikey’s up in the attic. Go get him and meet me in Fish’s room. We’ve all got to have a little meeting.”

“Mikey’s in the attic. That’s one thing cleared up. I don’t know what you two—“

“Ok, shut up!” screamed Kevin. “Shut the fuck up! This isn’t some stupid little prank. This is serious life and death shit.” Rob became quiet. He’d never seen Kevin like this. Maybe there was something going on.

“I’ll make you a deal,” Kevin continued. He was calmer but the strain in his voice was evident. “If after seeing Mikey, you still want to turn us both in, I promise we’ll go quietly. Otherwise bring him to Fish’s room. I have to finish cleaning up around here.”

“And Fish knows about this?”

“Oh yeah, Fish definitely knows all about this.”

“Ok, but you better not be lying.”

“Go find Mikey. You’ll see,” said Kevin somewhat absently, as he bent down and picked some shredded rags off the floor. Was that a belt?

Rob threw his hands in the air. “Why not?” Kevin’s attitude had really started to disturb him. He knew this was more than likely a joke and he wanted to find Mikey just to prove it. But something inside him was telling him all was not right. And as he and Todd passed back out into the empty front hall, and he saw the destroyed front door, he began to fear there really might be something terribly wrong.

“I can’t believe you’re buying that shit,” said Todd as they started up the stairs.

“I don’t completely,” said Rob. “But he saw something and I want to know what. Besides, I’m sick of this damn curfew. If Mikey really is in the attic, I at least want to find him, so we can put an end to it.”

Apparently Todd accepted this last argument because he kept silent the rest of the way to the attic door. As Rob pushed open the attic door, he noticed it was pitch black up there.

“He’s not up there,” said Todd with disgust.

“Yes, I am,” came a voice from above. “Come on up, Rob, Todd.”

Rob hesitated. That sounded like Mikey’s voice alright, but it wasn’t quite right. It sounded deeper, richer, almost as if it were coming from an older version of Mikey. And how did he know it was Rob? He hadn’t spoken. That feeling that something was wrong began to get stronger. He reached in the door to the light switch and flicked it on. Nothing happened.

“Oops, I guess the bulb’s out,” came Mikey’s voice. There was something in the tone; it had that gentle mocking quality it usually had before he sprung one of his gags. Now Rob was starting to think it was a joke after all.

“Come on down, Mikey,” called Rob. What ever these two had in mind he was not going to fall for it.

“No, you better come up here. After all, you promised Kevin you would.”

How the hell did he know that? If this was a gag, it was a damn good one.

“We didn’t promise shit,” called up Todd.

“You didn’t, but he did,” said Mikey.

Ok, this was getting creepy. First Kevin’s nervous attitude and now Mikey seemed to be psychic. At this point, it might be worth getting a bucket of water dumped on his head just to find out what the hell was going on. He put his foot on the first step and instantly felt Todd’s hand on his arm.

“What the fuck are you doing, dude?” asked Todd. “You’re walking right into it.”

“I don’t care,” said Rob. “I’m going to find out what the fuck is going on.” He pulled away from Todd and started up the stairs.

“Fuck,” said Todd and followed on after him.

Slowly Rob climbed the stairs into the utter darkness, dragging his hand along the stairwell wall to feel his way. All the time he had his eye peeled for any kind of trip wire or strange buckets or anything that looked out of place. But he could barely see his hand in front of his face, so in a moment he gave up all hope of spotting a practical joke in advance.

It was only when he reached the top step that he could finally see something. There was a dim light coming from one end of the attic. It looked like there was an old flashlight lying on the floor; and just beyond it he could make out a shape. It looked like someone huddled on the floor wrapped in a blanket. Mikey.

Now he was on full alert. If he had ever seen an obvious misdirect, this was it. He tried willing himself to see in the dark and looked everywhere for a sign of what Mikey had in store for them. But he still could hardly see anything at all in the darkness.

He heard Mikey chuckle. “There aren’t any stink bombs or water balloons. I’ve got something much better this time.”

“Oh yeah, what?” asked Todd.

“Come on over and find out,” said Mikey. The teasing tone in his voice was unmistakable.

“Come on,” said Rob to Todd, “let’s get this over with.” The two of them carefully made their way toward the only light source never letting their guard down for an instant. As they approached Mikey, Rob could see he was wrapped in an old puffy comforter, and through a gap in the front, he could just make out a dusty white shirt underneath. Rob bent down and picked up the flash light. He used it to do a quick search of the area. Nothing. Just Mikey.

“Where’d you get the flashlight? It looks like it’s about a hundred years old,” said Rob.

“I found it up here,” said Mikey. “I found a lot of things up here. I even found a shirt that almost fits me.”

“Good for fucking you,” said Todd.

“Ok, out with it,” said Kevin.

“What do you mean?” asked Mikey feigning innocence so badly it was obvious he was egging Rob on.

“Kevin said you had something to tell us, so tell us.”

“Hmmm,” said Mikey cocking his head and looking toward the ceiling. “I wonder what he could have meant.” He was doing a bad imitation of thinking. Rob was starting to get a little annoyed.

“Fucking tell us already, you little cocksucker,” said Todd.

“Oh I know,” said Mikey. “Maybe it was this.” And then Mikey stood up… and up… and up. Holy fuck! He was a good four inches taller than Rob, instead of the two inches shorter he ought to have been. His first thought was that the kid was standing on something, but one look at the floor and he saw Mikey’s large, bare feet sticking out from under the comforter.

“What the…, managed Rob. But that was all he could get out.

“Or maybe it was this,” said Mikey as he threw the comforter aside. Rob caught a quick glimpse of strained white cloth, before Mikey flexed his pecs and sent them exploding out of his shirt. Rob almost went weak in the knees at the sight of those huge, globular, striated masses, tearing their way out of Mikey’s shirt. And just below them, a particularly wide tear gave Rob a peek at the kid’s spectacular abs. He was completely stunned and Mikey gave him no time to recover.

“Or how about this?” asked Mikey, as he slowly brought his arms up toward a classic double bicep pose. Rob watched as the huge mounds on his upper arms swelled bigger and bigger and bigger, quickly filling and then straining the sleeves until giant granite hills erupted out of his sleeves, ripping them to shreds. They were large, defined and looked incredibly powerful. Rob had never seen anything like them in real life. He watched slack jawed as Mikey ripped off the remains of his shirt, and struck a most muscular pose. The kid’s body was amazing. He had been right about the abs. They were a spectacular eight pack. He could see a pair of thick lats spreading out behind him and his legs looked like they could support a house. He didn’t know how, but Mikey was huge, a living representation of the photos in his bodybuilding magazines. He had the body Rob had always wanted. And here it was on a kid, two years his junior, where it had no business being.

Mikey laughed out loud. “You should see the looks on your faces.”

“But, Mikey,” stuttered Rob, “how?”

Then Mikey had gotten this puckish look on his face. “Oh yeah… You like this, don’t you,” he said flexing his huge bicep for Rob and the older boy swallowed. “I’ve seen those magazines in your room. You want a body just like this, don’t you?” He teasingly flexed his abs, making them pop out of his stomach. Rob couldn’t help but gasp. “Big and strong and hard.” He made his pecs dance.

Rob was starting to get hard. He tried to stop it but he couldn’t. He wasn’t gay or anything but the thought of growing muscles like that always gotten him hard. And he sure as hell was thinking about it now. How could he help it?

“Well, I know how you can get a body like this.” He spread his lats wide. Rob hoped he didn’t have to walk anywhere soon. “And I might just tell you.”

This was too much for Rob to handle. “Mikey, for the love of God, just please tell us.”

“Yeah tell us, you fucking cocksucker,” said Todd.

Suddenly the smile vanished off of Mikey’s face. In one stride he was standing right in Todd’s face—at least his pecs were in Todd’s face. For the first time Rob saw just how big Mikey was. He was about five inches taller than Todd and he looked twice as wide, side to side and front to back. What sheer mass that kid had! He fucking dwarfed Todd. “What did you say?” asked Mikey.

“I said why don’t you tell us you cocksucker?” And then Todd balled his fist and hit Mikey right in the abs. There was an audible crack and then Todd pulled back his hand, shaking it.

Mikey just grinned. “I don’t think I like you,” he said. Then, with one hand, he grabbed Todd by the shirt collar and lifted him up off his feet. There wasn’t a hint of strain anywhere in his face and it looked like his bicep was barely working. “I don’t think you’re showing me the proper respect.” Then he dropped Todd who managed to land on his feet. But Mikey wasn’t done with him yet. He grabbed his uninjured arm and twisted it. The floor supervisor part of Rob wanted to stop this, but watching Mikey completely dominate Todd physically was fucking hot and his dick was close to the boiling point. Besides Todd could really be an asshole sometimes and Rob was just as happy to see him taken down a notch, especially by this giant kid with his incredible body. Todd tried to resist but he was so completely outmatched by Mikey’s strength, it was as if he hadn’t tried at all. In seconds Todd was on his knees in front of the muscle-bound teen.

“That’s better,” said Mikey, releasing him. “What do you have to say now?”

Todd opened his mouth but all that came out was “Um ah um…”

“That’s what I thought,” said Mikey flexing his bicep just enough so the peeks started to pop. “I think you’re going to sit in the corner now and not speak again unless I say you can.”

“Ok,” said Todd and he hustled over to the corner and sat down.

“Did you just speak?” asked Mikey, scowling.”

Todd opened his mouth to reply but then suddenly stopped and just shook his head instead.

“Good.”

“But Mikey,” managed Rob “How did you do that? How did you get that body?”

Mikey smiled. “I think that’s what Kevin wants to discuss at the meeting.”

“And how did you know about that?”

“I overheard you guys.”

“You were down there?”

“No, from up here. I can hear a lot better now; see in the dark, too. And I have this awesome sense of direction. I actually found my way back here, through the woods at night.”

“You’re shitting me.”

Mikey just smiled and shook his head. “We’d better get to Fish’s room. Kevin is already gathering people for the meeting.”

“How…?”

But Mikey just tapped his ear with his finger.

“Fuck.”

The two of them started for the stairs, but Todd remained glued to his seat in the corner. Then, as almost an afterthought, Mikey called over his shoulder, “You can come, too, but I don’t want to hear you speak without permission. And if you address me again, you will call me sir. Is that understood? You may answer.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Ok, come,” said Mikey, and Todd scuttled after them like a dog invited for a walk.

During the short trip to Fish’s room, Rob’s mind began to process all he had taken in. He remembered Kevin’s insistence that they had all been genetically manipulated. That would certainly account for Mikey’s size. But there were still a lot of pieces missing. And then he remembered the giant on the lawn. Holy crap, had that been one of them?

When they entered Fish’s room there were already a lot of kids there. Mikey got a lot of gasps, and “What the fuck?”s. After he refused to answer any questions until Kevin got there, a lot of the guys asked to feel his muscles. He was only too glad to oblige. Rob could tell he was eating this up. And why not, if Rob were in his position, he’d be eating it up, too.

More kids kept arriving and the place became really packed. It was rare that all thirty of them got together outside of meal times and this room, although large, was not the dining hall. And then it struck him.

“Where’s Fish?” No one seemed to know. When he asked Mikey, all he got was a shrug from those gargantuan shoulders. Hew got a feeling Mikey knew something, but he wasn’t prepared to tell until Kevin got there. And Rob was painfully aware there was no way he could get Mikey to do anything he didn’t want to. He also noticed Brad wasn’t there.

Finally Kevin arrived. He had a couple of small kitchen garbage bags with him. He headed straight for the small fridge Fish had in the corner. He opened it up, pulled out the sodas and started passing them around.

“Hey, those are Fish’s,” protested Greg Armistead.

“It’s ok,” said Kevin flatly. “Fish doesn’t want them anymore.”

Rob couldn’t stand it any longer. “Ok, Kevin, what the fuck is going on?”

“Just a minute,” said Kevin and he stuffed the two trash bags into the now empty fridge. The he turned to face the crowd. “You all know Mikey,” he said, “and I’m sure you’ve all noticed that he’s gone through a few changes recently.” There was a lot of head nodding. “I think Mikey is the best person to tell you about that.” And then Rob sat back and listened to Mikey’s tale. If Mikey hadn’t been standing right there, literally larger than life, he doubted if he would have believed a word of it. But there he was.

Mikey left off at the part where Fish entered the story and then Kevin picked it up. He told about how he and Fish had gone on the computer and found everybody’s file and confirmed that everyone, save Caleb, had been completely altered, and was doomed to go through the same kind of change Mikey was now experiencing.

Suddenly there was chaos. Everyone started talking at once. Rob became instantly lost in dreams of large mussels erupting all over his body. It was an impossible dream come true. He couldn’t wait to experience it. Fuck those vitamin shots. He could tell from the rest of the room, that no one else would ever touch one either. Then he noticed Kevin was trying to quiet everyone down. He wasn’t having much luck. Rob stood up and tried to get everyone’s attention. He didn’t do much better. Finally Mikey shouted, “Quiet!” and everyone shut up.

“Thank you,” said Kevin. “Just for the record, does everyone one want to do this?” The jumble of thirty voices erupted again. “Just a show of hands, please, just a show of hands.” Rob looked around. Every single hand was up in the air, including his. “You sure,” said Kevin. “Once you do this, there’s no turning back.” No one’s hand budged. “I thought this might happen,” said Kevin, looking defeated.

“I just have a couple of questions,” said Rob waving his hand.

“Yes?” said Kevin, looking more tired than any sixteen-year-old ever should.

“Where the hell is Fish?”

Kevin seemed to slump. “You saw that giant out on the lawn?”

Ron nodded suddenly guessing the answer.

“That was Fish.” The room erupted again and it took another shout from Mikey to quiet them all down.

“I don’t get it,” said Rob. “Didn’t Fish get a vitamin shot?”

“Sure he did,” shouted Danny Glover. “Two days ago. We get ours at the same time.”

“Fish found a way to make the change happen instantaneously, and he used it on himself before I could stop him.”

The room started to erupt again, but Mikey silenced it, with just a look this time.

“So why don’t we all just grow right now and then bust our way out of here?” asked Rob, smiling when his idea was greeted with cheers.

“We could do that,” said Kevin, “but it wouldn’t be smart.”

“Why not?”

“Do you really want to become a rampaging mob of giants terrorizing the countryside? How long do you think it would be before they sent in the army? We wouldn’t be exactly hard to find.”

There was a lot of murmuring.

“So, what do you suggest?”

“Rob, Lenny, Todd, Bruce, Phil and Andy are all scheduled to have their vitamin shots tomorrow morning.”

“I’m not taking it,” said Rob, resolutely.

“Exactly,” said Kevin. “I have already substituted real vitamin shots for the inhibitor. By this time tomorrow night, you six should look exactly like Mikey.”

Rob was floored. Tomorrow night he was going to get huge. He couldn’t wait, but… “Why just the six of us? And why only Mikey’s size? Why don’t we go all the way?”

“Camouflage,” said Kevin. “We’re going to have to be able to blend in with normal people, otherwise we’ll get caught. Mikey says at his size he could still take on all the guards himself. With six of you, it should be no problem at all, and you still won’t be so big you’ll stand out in a crowd, at least not immediately."

"Won't there be seven of us," asked Rob. "What about Mikey?"

“Mikey's go another job to do. After the takeover is complete, we all will break up and go our separate ways, in teams of no more than three. Each team will take some of the inhibitor with them, enough to last a week or so. The idea being that we use the week to find a safe place to… well, to let it happen. Preferably some place far away from here. It will also put them off guard. They will expect us to start changing almost immediately, and when it doesn’t happen, they won’t know what to think or where to look.”

“And then what?” asked Rob.

“We keep as low a profile as possible and hope nobody ever finds us. I know it’s not perfect, but it’s the best plan I could come up with.”

“I think it’s fucking brilliant,” said Mikey, and Kevin smiled.

“So, where’s Brad,” asked Rob. “Why isn’t he here?”

“We can’t tell Brad,” said Kevin. “They’ve got him in their pocket. Tell Brad and you might as well tell Gibbons himself. We’ve got to leave Brad out of this, until the takeover is complete and we’re ready to go.”

“Yeah,” said Rob, agreeing. “It’s probably the smartest way to go.” Most of the other kids agreed it was a good plan, even if they didn’t like it too much. A large percentage of them favored the rampaging giant scenario, but in the end they agreed to go along with Kevin’s plan.

“What about me?” asked Caleb.

“You’re the luckiest son of a bitch here,” said Kevin. “You can leave here and have a normal life.”

“But I don’t want a normal life,” said Caleb. "I want to be big."

"You want to be a freak?"

"A regular freak? No. An insanely powerful muscle freak? Hell yes!" There was a huge roar of agreement from the crowd.

“What are you, thirteen?” asked Kevin.

“I’ll be fourteen in August.”

“You’re just a kid. You don’t know what you want.”

“I’m eighteen,” said Rob. “I’m legal. I know what I want and that is it.” He pointed at Mikey. “If the kid wants to go through his final treatment, let him.” There was a general agreement in the room and Kevin threw up his hands and gave in. “Fine. Then get ready, because tomorrow night, we take over.”

There was a tremendous cheer. Rob was especially enthusiastic because tomorrow night he would get his dream. Tomorrow night he would grow into huge and powerful muscle behemoth, and he couldn’t wait.

[rextorres]

You can just imagine the chaos, the drama, and the intensity that took place at the orphanage that evening, when all hell broke loose! It's the revenge of the muscle boys! The revolution has begun! The muscle boys are ready to take over!

What a fun story, Jaypat! Kudos!!!

[muscl4life]

I can almost smell all the action that is about to start, you really have created a catching enviroment, hope you have fun continuing this thrilling saga. the way how Kevin suddenly became the mind behind all the plans, and the way poor victims want to take over their own lives is indeed touching.

Congratulations again, and thank you for your kind words in the last chapter

Cheers

[sexiscriptor]

great chapter i really enjoyed the way rob already valuates power and superiority by size (first when he's saying how it's easier commanding respect when nobody else can get terribly big and then when he's debating arguing with Todd and decides since he doesn't have much of a size advantage over todd the douche might as well just come along)
Plus, i think everybody enjoyed is getting hard up in the attic, yeh? :P

Two things though I'd point out--and to which end I get to fiddle with the list-thing --:

1. Originally Posted by Jaypat

   But Mikey wasn?t done with him yet. He grabbed his uninjured arm and twisted it.

   It's not terribly important, really, it just irked me so bear with me a second and I promise to spare you the tedious and possibly confusing semantic arguments & proofs (although if you're curious feel free to message me and i'll gladly explain it to death ) Anyway, I think the's partly exagerated by context ("not done with him yet" and "uninjured arm"; somehow have a slightly 'violent' edge to them even if it's not meant as outright violence, yeh?), but "twisting"--especially of a finite thing such as a limb, an arm in this case,--is somewhat telic, as I'd describe it (meaning, in essence, 'it's not over till it's done'--you build a house until it's done, you drink a beer until it's empty, and in either case if you were to continue 'building' or 'drinking' you'd have to start another.) Effffectively my first image was of Mikey simply twisting Todd's arm out of its socket or shit, something fairly out of character for everyone involved yet it was only in reading on that I had to conclude that wasn't what you were talking about XD
2. Of course, I'm sure it goes beyond this, but the following 'argument' posited by Rob struck me as a logical fallacy:
   

   Originally Posted by Jaypat

   ?I?m eighteen,? said Rob. ?I?m legal. I know what I want and that is it.? He pointed at Mikey. ?If the kid wants to go through his final treatment, let him.? There was a general agreement in the room and Kevin threw up his hands and gave in.?

   If only because it's a troubled debate even outside our little mgs worlds--out in the real world, that is; it dabbles rather carelessly in both issues of epistemology and youth rights, or whatever it's called. But I'll deal with neither, largely. Instead I'll focus on logic at work, as I see it, and what irks me about it. I'll get down to it (for once XD): It doesn't make sense of things, it doesn't prove anything, and most troubling of all the character asserts himself as though it has and Kevin, our voice of "Reason", seems to think so too. Rob's being 18 and legal doesn't change the fact Caleb is still not 18--or legal--and moreover does not as such impart any "legal" sovereignty or responsibility to Caleb. I won't make a thing of it; it's your story, obviously, and I'm not about to make you change your characters or plot or anything, but it irked me; and thought I could give another much more severe examples to clarify my case/point/whatever (sitcoms and some make this same mistake all the time and to much worse degree and effect, often) but I've already spent enough time on this and i'm sure you're bored to tears ;p
3. Gosh, jaypat! stop being so rational and tempering all the time! everybody totally just wants to seem these guys grow through teh ROOF with muscle-power and sex! i mean then we can have us another endless story of titans dueling it out for control or dominance or simply powertripping--and of course making themselves bigger rein the renegades in in order to satisfy not only our fetish but sense of self-righteousness and need for "justice"!! quit it with all this rational, thoughtprovoking and hot storytelling, yo! Gosh!</tease> ;p

haha, anyway, sorry to lecture; it was another good chapter; obviously not as exciting as the first or third ones--being largely void of self-indulgent growth scenes, of course ;p--, but nicely thought out and excellently progressing things along, and of course well written
take care and still looking forward to whatever you've got for us next!
~Palmer

[Jaypat]

I'm having a lot of trouble posting my long and well thought out reply to Sexiscriptor. The board keeps rejecting my posts for some software related reason. Therefore, I'm going to try doing it in small incriments to see if that will work.

[Jaypat]

I could have been clearer about the whole arm twisting thing. The phrase, "forcing him to the ground," would have solved the problem. I must be getting sloppy.

[Jaypat]

Yes, you are right. The character is not thinking logically?but how many of us would under those circumstances. And Kevin?s reaction is not agreement with Rob?s argument but acceptance of the futility of fighting a mob mentality. He knows he could put forward the most logical and well-thought-out argument the world has ever seen and it would do him absolutely no good. These guys are thinking with their hormones, and logic just doesn?t work under those circumstances. However, since the chapter is written from Rob?s point of view, and Rob would interperate Kevin?s reaction as acceptance of his argument, the scene still works.

[Jaypat]

I’m afraid with me you get a plot weather you want it or not. But don’t worry there will be plenty of that other stuff, too. Just not in the next chapter. It looks like chapter five will be almost totally plot related. I’m looking for a place to stick in a hot spot, but so far no luck. However, from chapter six on, things should really get hopping.

[tagsnola]

I'm definately good with the plot thing. More even than all the detail about the muscle growth, although that certainly has its place given the nature of the beast here. As for the mob mentality and thinking with their hormones, they're also kids, not adults. And given the option, I think most kids would rather be big and strong than just run of the mill ordinary, especially orphans who have had almost no control over their lives. After all, what would Caleb's prospects be once this orphanage thing finally unravels? To go back into the child welfare system? Between that and the possibility of becoming bigger and stronger than the grownups who have pushed Caleb from pillar to post, I think in his shoes and at his age, I'd have opted for the muscle and the chance to have some say in my own outcomes. From that standpoint, the mob consensus does not really seem so far off the mark in terms of what makes sense in terms of whether or not Caleb should accept the final injection. Of course, if I were Caleb's parents, I'd put 2 ounces of lead between the eyes of anyone who tried to turn my son into a guinea pig. (I HATE those Dr. Mengele types!) But, hey, Caleb is an orphan so, sans `rents, it falls to him to decide for himself, for better or worse. I just hope, however it finally plays out that it turns out OK for him.
TagsNOLA

[skumbum]

Nice work, Jaypat

[gogothen]

damn man i dont care what people say. this shit is fucken hot hot hot
i hope Ch. 5 is coming very soon

[Kit Werecat]

I'm reminded of Peter Pan's "Lost Boys" here. Lost boys with muscle. Thirty-or-so kids all destined to be Muscle Gods. Terrific idea, with so many possibilities.

One of the great parts about this story is the certain destiny of it all. Most stories dwell on "SHOULD they or SHOULDN'T they", and finally come down to "WILL they", and never seem to get beyond that. The minute the decision is made, the story ends.

This story is unique because at the first paragraph we are already beyond that - these kids ARE going to get HUGE.. PERIOD. Now at last we can move on to "What happens then?", which is a fascinating idea to ponder. The adult's primary power over kids most often comes down to size and strength, and this story threatens to turn that issue upside-down.

I'm really excited about seeing where this story goes; the concept alone opens up enough plots to make a mini-series (or at least a novel) out of it.

Keep up the GREAT work, and BRAVO for a truly fresh story idea!

[chocomus]

nice story! I really want to see the musclekids take over!
Today, the orphanage. Tomorrow, the entire world! Mwahahaha!
The most important question: Will Kevin grow? I'd like to know.

[TheMM]

Originally Posted by tagsnola

Of course, if I were Caleb's parents, I'd put 2 ounces of lead between the eyes of anyone who tried to turn my son into a guinea pig. (I HATE those Dr. Mengele types!)

Oh I completely agree on that. Though I would then follow that up by saying: "Make me the guinea pig instead!"

[BLinin]

In all the years I've checked out this board, I can't remember ever being so anxious to read more of a story. I sign on almost every night hoping to see part 5. I know masterpieces take a while to create, but wanted to say how much I am enjoying this story. (I feel like the pope in "Agony and the Ecstacy": "WHEN WILL IT BE DONE?")

Thanks for this great story!

[Jaypat]

I have been tied up with other matters for the past week or so and haven't had much time to work on The Orphanage. But I should be able to get back to it soon.

I'm gald you are enjoying it and thanks for your patience.

[TheMM]

Originally Posted by Jaypat

I'm gald you are enjoying it and thanks for your patience.

What is this...patience thing you mention? We have never had this...patience you speak of. We are simply forced to wait while writers take their sweet time; well....writing!

[BLinin]

Originally Posted by Jaypat

I have been tied up with other matters for the past week or so and haven't had much time to work on The Orphanage. But I should be able to get back to it soon.

I'm gald you are enjoying it and thanks for your patience.

One of the mottos of my life is "If patience is a virtue, I must be DAMNED virtuous." Actually, I know how life can be. Whenever you have time, I feel sure I will enjoy the next episode. Thanks.

[tmt4321]

this is a freakin cool story, the kids should destroy the orphanage though