Little Brother Muscles Up part 4

[gideon]

My homecoming dinner had turned into a full-blown drama. Kevin had charged out of the house with the two ignorant jocks, leaving both my parents very distressed. I gave them time to recover their composure by making small talk, but soon I was unable to contain myself any longer. Though I knew it would be certain to pain them further, I had to know the full story of how my amiable little brother had evolved into a foul-mouthed monster in less than a year.

When they began their explanation it was to reprise Kevin's tale of how the loss of his big brother had affected him in a profound and unexpected way. The entire drive home from the airport had seen Kevin curled up on the car rear seat, morose and inconsolable. It was expected he would soon snap out of his mood, but a strange sense of betrayal had hung over him for days afterwards, changing him from a happy, outgoing kid into a sullen, moody teen.

He began to spend hours in the basement, taking his resentment out on my exercise equipment. Knowing nothing at all about weight training, at first he punished his frail little body to little effect. Dad's reaction was to humor him by encouraging him to train properly and methodically. He bought Kevin magazines and books on lifting schedules and proper nutrition. Kevin's thanks were to rudely snatch the publications and virtually lock himself in the basement, only emerging for school and when nobody was around to gorge himself on food.

Despite their concerns for his wellbeing, they decided it was best to give him space to work out his personal issues. Kevin would soon be back to his usual sunny self, they were certain. But things were to get a whole lot worse. Soon my academically bright little brother began to skip school in order to nurture his growing obsession for pumping iron. It was not a situation that Dad was likely to tolerate for long, and the day he confronted Kevin with his deteriorating schoolwork was to mark a fundamental change in their father/son relationship. By now it had been several weeks since my departure for college as Dad banged furiously on the locked basement door, demanding entry.

When the door was eventually opened and he stepped inside, the smell of musk and sweat was overpowering. But the bigger shock was the sight of his son. He was an unkempt figure with matted hair and a stubbly beard - personal hygiene had evidently been abandoned along with school - and he had sprouted an extra couple of inches! Though he was no muscular powerhouse, his relentless, obsessive training had already transformed his formerly slim body with some impressive muscle and sinew.

It apparently took Dad some minutes to recover from the sight. His well-rehearsed lecture evaporated under the withering gaze of his intimidating son who then insolently ordered him out of his personal domain. Dad meekly scuttled back to Mom, undecided how best to manage this latest development. In the weeks that followed, they remained shocked and uncertain of what to do about their rebellious son. They were actually on the verge of contacting me at college to share the pain when suddenly Kevin emerged from his self-imposed exile in the basement to shower, shave and return to school. Mom was ecstatic, smothering her unfamiliarly taller and more muscular son in one of her trademark hugs.

But their joy was to be short lived as reports from school informed them of Kevin's increasingly aggressive behaviour towards students and teachers alike. He had sought out the company of the school jocks and soon it was evident that he had only abandoned the basement for the bigger and better equipment on offer at school and down at the YMCA.

By Christmas, Kevin had become inseparable from the two worst jocks, Tucker and Mason. He craved their constant company, involved himself in their every spiteful prank and became their compliant slave. By now Kevin was eating my folks out of house and home. His rapid development was also being fuelled by expensive supplements, and he needed a constant supply of new clothes to fit his expanding body. All of this was costing Mom and Dad a small fortune, for which Kevin remained profoundly ungrateful.

As January became February, Kevin's rude and aggressive behaviour went off the scale. That was when Mom made a chance discovery of phials of liquid and syringes hidden among his personal things. Dad immediately realised the significance, and another parental confrontation became unavoidable. If Dad found the previous encounter an unequal challenge, this one was infinitely worse. The son he was so desperate to counsel now towered over him, a powerful colossus of rippling muscle who had by now graduated from being a mere servile acolyte of Tucker and Mason to being the unassailable leader of the pack. Such a dominant alpha male was never likely to appreciate criticism from any source, not even his own father.

Dad's humiliation was total. Broken and fearful, his parental authority gone for ever, Dad walked away from that encounter with Kevin's latest demand ringing in his ears. Now that he was 16 he intended to learn to drive. And Dad's beloved Porsche would be his to use whenever he wanted it.

...

I don't know how long I lay in the darkness of my attic room, sick to my stomach at what my parents had just shared with me. I felt shocked, disgusted and angry. I also felt pangs of guilt that I had a degree of responsibility for all that had happened, and I was deeply ashamed that I had selfishly avoided coming home for Christmas when I just might have been of some help to everyone.

I had somehow to make amends, overcome my infatuation with what Kevin had become and win back my brother from the dark place he now inhabited.
A noise downstairs roused me from my thoughts. I guessed it must be Kevin arriving home. Sure enough, I heard footsteps on the stairs then his room door being closed. I gave him a few minutes then left my attic to speak with him.

When I pushed open the door, Kevin was seated at his computer, shirtless and with his back to me. It was my first sight of his bare, muscular back and I gasped to see his massively broad shoulders. For a few seconds I stood there gawping. Then I forced my mind back to the job in hand.

"Kevin, can I have a word?"

No response. He just carried on typing as if I'd said nothing.

"I'm so sorry, man", I continued. "I never realised how much my going off to college would affect you. Mom and Dad have told me how much pain I caused you. If I could take it all back, believe me I would."

Kevin sat impassively, continuing to work on his computer, giving every impression of not having heard a single word.

"Kevin?"

"Did I hear you knock?" his voice growled in irritation.

What was this?

"Please don't play games with me, Kevin. I need you to listen to me."

He spun round on his stool and glared at me.

"Oh ... so Mommy's little boy needs me to listen to him? Well fuck that. But maybe you should listen to me. First off, nobody walks into my room unless I say so. Second, your days of telling me what I can and can't do are over. And third, I don't fuckin' appreciate you butting in when I'm busy. So be a good little boy and go play in your attic."

"But ... but Kevin ... please ... we really must talk", I spluttered.

He rose slowly from the stool until he towered menacingly over me, his face an angry scowl. My eyes focused on his chest and I saw for the first time that my little brother's rippling pecs bristled with a carpet of manly hair. I was envious, conscious of how disappointed I had always been that my chest was virtually bare. Stretching a hand out he began to push me backwards until I collided painfully with the doorpost. Then he lowered his furious face until we were nose to nose. I swallowed hard and tried to remain composed.

"Kevin, please talk to me. Why are you treating Mom and Dad so badly? And when did you start associating with shit heads like Tucker and Mason? They've always been such assholes."

Kevin's face got darker still.

"You fuckin' little pussy. What makes you think you got any right to poke your nose into my business? For your information I don't associate with those losers, I RULE them! They know who's the boss and they don't mess with me. That's something you could do with learning, little man. So why don't you get the fuck out of my room before I forget you're my brother and beat the shit out of your sorry ass?"

As I backed out the door, he slammed it in my face. Flustered, embarrassed but also getting very aroused, I stumbled up the attic stairs and into the refuge of my tiny room. As I threw myself onto the bed, my mind was taking an emotional rollercoaster ride and my hand was massaging the boner in my pants. Seconds later I blew my load in sexual homage to my powerful kid brother. Kevin had just proved that he possessed the raw power and authority to make me cower like a frightened child in the presence of an awesome adult. He was the embodiment of the very thing I had always craved but had never had - a powerful, dominant brother.

I was excited, but also disgusted at myself. My parents needed help to deal with Kevin's teenage overdrive and I owed it to them to deliver. I owed it also to my troubled brother. And I owed it not least to my own self respect. But right now my heart was still racing from sheer naked lust. If Kevin had entered the room at that moment I would have thrown myself at his feet in total submission to his muscular superiority.

As I slowly descended from my sexual high my rational mind reasserted itself to confront me with my nightmare predicament. I loathed what Kevin had become. But it was also obvious that part of me was loving it.

(more to follow)

[Giga_Huge5000]

While I don't mind dominant characters (in fact I usually prefer them) Kevin is starting to turn me off with his cruelty. As I read through this, I'm thinking that his brother leaving for college wasn't the real reason for this sudden change in Kevin.

Still, I want to know what's going to happen next!

[tagsnola]

... to his own lust and to that punk younger brother's bullying, Kevin, he is every bit as detestable as the younger brother. Hopefully, he will NEVER allow his younger brother to learn of his untoward arousals and hopefully, he will find a way to whip his younger brother back into line, with extreme prejudice!

Actually, this story is quite good. Kevin is the kind of character you love to hate. I just hope the older brother, after he deals with his own issues, manages to save the day in the end. One hopeful sign is that he seems to be willing to accept the responsibility to set things right. And, if at first he does not succeed, he must try, try again.

[giantw]

Great character descriptions. I can see why Kevin's dominance is both disheartening as well as appealing. Rather than demand that the story end in one way or another, I trust your judgment as the author to give your story its proper finish. I can't wait for the next chapter!

[Adam]

Excellent! A very interesting contrast in the main character's two reactions to his brother's transformation. I'm very curious to see how this will end!

[luvyalots]

The story is written so well. I wish my stories flowed this beautifully. I look forward to reading more.

[psu3doreal]

Sorry, giantw, I have to disagree. Not only do I not find it at all appealing, I also find it really hard to believe. A father withering at the site of his son AFTER finding out he's taking steroids? You've got to be kidding me. Suspension of disbelief doesn't go that far.

[TheMM]

Originally Posted by psu3doreal

Sorry, giantw, I have to disagree. Not only do I not find it at all appealing, I also find it really hard to believe. A father withering at the site of his son AFTER finding out he's taking steroids? You've got to be kidding me. Suspension of disbelief doesn't go that far.

Now now, each is entitled to their own opinion. Perhaps indeed that the steroid thing was a bit far-fetched, I certainly won't deny that. If you don't like the story going too far, simply do not read it. No one (not even I) can make you read anything on here. I don't always agree with everyone here on everything, but rarely do I argue, especially for a long time.

With that being said...

I totally agree about Kevin getting his just desserts. I do love a good domination story, but I love more, when the dominator, becomes the dominated. In other words, a role reversal.

[giantw]

Originally Posted by psu3doreal

Sorry, giantw, I have to disagree. Not only do I not find it at all appealing, I also find it really hard to believe. A father withering at the site of his son AFTER finding out he's taking steroids? You've got to be kidding me. Suspension of disbelief doesn't go that far.

Once again, the most withering criticism of a story's substance comes from a user who has never submitted a story of his own. Yet you have in the past, psu3doreal, freely offered up criticism in these "lil bro" stories when they did not fit YOUR take on the fetish (e.g. The Bully and the Freak, Little Bro Grows, etc.) Understandable, as it is easier to dish out criticism than to create something new...

Please try to keep in mind that this is gideon's take on the fetish. While it may be constructive to criticize him were the story difficult to read, confusing, etc., I do not see what possible purpose you might have in criticizing the story's content. Perhaps you're hoping gideon will just write the story to suit your tastes over his own. I take comfort in the fact that, as the author, he does not have to, nor will he betray the artistic integrity of his story in such a manner. As has been suggested in countless threads, including the previous post: if you don't like the story's content, move on.

I am further confused about your criticism that the story is "hard to believe." This story is fiction, after all. Moreover, I do not see how a father cowed by his larger, more aggressive and domineering son is any more difficult to believe than a man who attacks windmills that he mistakes for giants, or a house being carried off by a tornado only to be deposited in a magical world of witches, wizards and munchkins...After all, this is FICTION! But if you're suspension of disbelief is so severely strained by this scenario, perhaps you would like to offer up a story of your own...

Oh, what's that?...You have a right to whine about stories that authors have worked hard on? You don't have to prove anything to me? No...I suppose you're right...Go ahead and comment away.

[tagsnola]

Originally Posted by luvyalots

The story is written so well. I wish my stories flowed this beautifully. I look forward to reading more.

I wish *I* could write well enough to get a compliment like that from Luvyalots!

[MuscleStallion]

Originally Posted by TheMM

Now now, each is entitled to their own opinion. Perhaps indeed that the steroid thing was a bit far-fetched, I certainly won't deny that. If you don't like the story going too far, simply do not read it. No one (not even I) can make you read anything on here. I don't always agree with everyone here on everything, but rarely do I argue, especially for a long time.

With that being said...

I totally agree about Kevin getting his just desserts. I do love a good domination story, but I love more, when the dominator, becomes the dominated. In other words, a role reversal.

But in this story it isn't a role reversal, The older brother protected the younger brother from the bullies at school, and now that the little bro is jacked up on steroids he is treating everyone that cared for him like pieces of crap....Every part up until this one I was very happy and pleased with...but I am afraid I am going to have to jump on the band-wagon here. It has bypassed Dominance and even Arogance....it is reaching the point of being Rude and Jerkish. The little brother is becoming what his older brother had protected him from.

[Otaru_grower]

I have to say, as far as criticism goes I think everyone should be free to give it as long as its not trolling or whatnot. I myself feel conflicted by this story because I don't look kindly on any kind of abuse. Psychologists have explored abuse on parents by children and it is not a pretty picture. While I appreciate the sentiments of this story (I'm up for a good domination tale) this strikes me as very non sexual because of the threatening nature of the type of situation it represents, namely someone that would for all intents and purposes be labeled a danger to those around him.

I like the main character, and the dynamic of little/big brother is always an interesting dynamic. And given this forum has all types of fantasies that are highly unlikely and non reality based, but yeah, I can't really enjoy a story where a family willingly takes abuse, whether its emotional or physical. There's something unsettling about it that exceeds the bounds of comfortable sexual fantasy...it's awkward because on the one hand you have a very sexual allure and on the other a kind of repulsive emotional issue which cancels the other out.

We all like to fantasize about muscular hunks, but if one of those hunks happens to be say, racist or a rapist or something like that, the allure is gone.

[gideon]

Jeepers, guys, I'm only inventing a bit of muscle fantasy - I never expected the Spanish Inquisition! All of this psychoanalysis is making me hesitate to polish up the final chapter, because it's very obvious I cannot possibly please you all.

[arpeejay]

Gideon, dear, just do it, anyway. The point of writing is to please YOURSELF, not us, and if in doing so you please SOME of us you've done a very good thing. Criticism (of themes) almost always reveals more about the hot buttons of the critic than it says anything at all about the author.

All the best...

Richard

Gideon, I can only second Richard's advice. If the conflicting desires of the posters to this thread were to paralyze you to the extent of discouraging you from finishing this story, however it turns out, it would be a very great pity. Write what seems pleasing and internally coherent to you, and let the chips fall where they may.

[Dodger61]

I'll line up with Richard and Musclecult -- finish the way you originally conceived it, however that may be. I'll also second that the "criticisms" so far reveal more about the blindspots and issues of the critics than providing any insight about your work. Besides, really good fiction DOES challenge us to think about the "unthinkable"

As to the relationship between Kevin and his father, I think you've captured the essence of current day over-intellectualized and over-psychologized parenting. I find it thoroughly believable that a father such as you have delineated would be intimidated by the kind of raw physical presence Kevin is described as having.

it's a really good story and I look forward to reading the rest.

[giantw]

Originally Posted by gideon

Jeepers, guys, I'm only inventing a bit of muscle fantasy - I never expected the Spanish Inquisition! All of this psychoanalysis is making me hesitate to polish up the final chapter, because it's very obvious I cannot possibly please you all.

Ahh...so it appears the critics have won...

Whiney Critics 01 - Freedom of Expression 00

Way to all gang up on Gideon. You have succeeded in repressing his speech because it failed to conform with your demands. Will you guys be holding a book burning later on?

[gideon]

wow ...... chill out, guys. I only meant I've been surprised at all the attempts at profound analysis of what is nothing more substantial than erotic fiction. I'll finish the story soon, I really will. And I appreciate all the comments, good, bad or downright cranky

[TheMM]

Originally Posted by gideon

wow ...... chill out, guys. I only meant I've been surprised at all the attempts at profound analysis of what is nothing more substantial than erotic fiction. I'll finish the story soon, I really will. And I appreciate all the comments, good, bad or downright cranky

I suppose I'm just as guilty eh? But, your story is your story.

Originally Posted by MuscleStallion

But in this story it isn't a role reversal, The older brother protected the younger brother from the bullies at school, and now that the little bro is jacked up on steroids he is treating everyone that cared for him like pieces of crap....Every part up until this one I was very happy and pleased with...but I am afraid I am going to have to jump on the band-wagon here. It has bypassed Dominance and even Arogance....it is reaching the point of being Rude and Jerkish. The little brother is becoming what his older brother had protected him from.

I realize that. What I met by a "role reversal" in this case, is where the older brother juices up, and then becomes the alpha male over his brother and his jock-bitches. Sure that would make him a hypocrite, but I don't believe I've ever seen anything quite like it on thie forum before. But, as above, it ain't my story to tell Gideon what to do.

And btw....Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!! (Oh come on, you knew I was gonna say that.)

[rextorres]

You have to realize that by posting ANY story on this forum, you will allow for others to critisize your work. Hey, getting a lot of feedback is far better than getting no feedback at all! At least you'll know that your story is being read!

Gideon, just write the ending of your story the way you had planned it. I usually write my stories from beginning to the end before I post it. That way, I end up not having to change anything later, due to the comments that I receive from the critics. But, that's just my 2 cents of advice.

Just finish your story and post it. I think your writing is very good. I can't say I "like" your Kevin character at all in this story, but I guess he turned out that way because he started hanging out with the "wrong" friends.

I'm just eager to see how you come up with the ending.

[Jaypat]

Originally Posted by Otaru_grower

I And given this forum has all types of fantasies that are highly unlikely and non reality based,

Oh man!!!! You mean none of this is real???? I guess I can stop rifling through the 7-11, looking for cans of gigabooster.


Seriously, the minute Kevin was able to take three steps toward that cop without being mased and night sticked, I knew we had left Kansas. In the real world he'd have been face down on the pavement, cuffed and with a couple of cracked ribs for suvineers. It's a fantasy and anything goes.

Getting a strong reaction from your readers is a sign of effective writing--no matter what that reaction is. Take it as a complimient that so many people are posting their thoughts so passionately.

And above all....

KEEP WRITING!

[giantw]

Yes, all crankiness aside, keep writing. I want to see how YOU finish this story.

[digger]

Originally Posted by gideon

When the door was eventually opened and he stepped inside, the smell of musk and sweat was overpowering. But the bigger shock was the sight of his son. He was an unkempt figure with matted hair and a stubbly beard - personal hygiene had evidently been abandoned along with school - and he had sprouted an extra couple of inches! Though he was no muscular powerhouse, his relentless, obsessive training had already transformed his formerly slim body with some impressive muscle and sinew.

Hmmm...maybe he looked something like this:

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/photo/...&ppuser=447757

[johnd]

Gideon - I've had similar criticisms of some of my stories. Some of my characters are dark as well and my endings don't always fit some readers' desires. In fact, I did stop writing a story because of criticisms here. I just got so upset I couldn't write the story anymore. But keep on writing. I'd love to see what Kevin does now that his brother is home.

[Otaru_grower]

I don't discourage you from writing what you want. I just wanted to clear that up.

[onemusclefreak]

Keep going! Such a hot story!

[alekion]

Just entered the site for the first time...great in every aspect. And this is a wonderful story...
Keep it going
alekion

[F_R_Eaky]

I have to think it a bit funny for all the critics who think the little brother is going too far. He's in the middle of he teen-age years, he's obviously in the middle of a growth spurt, to add on to it he's in the middle of bulking up and he's apparently doing it with steroids. Given all that chemical and harmonal colliding going on in the the lil' brother's body I think a bout of roid rage where he takes things too far (and probably doesn't realize he's doing it) isn't to far to expect. That kind of scenario isn't a much of a fantasy as some would believe.
Not that I buy everyone goes into a roid rage if they're massively using the stuff. Get real. Everyone's body is similar in many ways, but they are also different. Different chemical balances have different reactions. I've seen steroids effect people in various ways: roid rage, bitch look, acne city, super bloat, and super buff.

Either way, it is a good story. It is interesting. It is intriguing. If it is roid rage, it would be very interesting to see how big brother helps little brother, if possible, through this to become a sensible and sane monster of mass and when the brotherhood back. (or would he attempt to fight fire with fire, find the same stuff and join him?....)

Maybe not your cup of tea. Two choices: if it's so hard to swallow, hit the back key and don't read on. If it's not soooo bad, read it, ponder it, and think of all the possible ways it could be resolved. Even if the ending isn't something you like, perhaps you'll be inspired to write something new as you'd like to see it.


All in all KUDOS to the author, you've given us something to think about and debate. Not all writing or fantasy has to give us pleasure to positively stimulate the mind (or other areas )

Frank

[rolling]

Love it, please keep going.

[Bradykins]

God. I love Kevin. Just his personality...ugh.

I want someone like him so bad Dx

But oh well, I can dream.

Excellent story. I can't wait for the next chapter! ^_^!

[gideon]

I'm flattered by all your comments, thank you, but just a bit bewildered by those of you who "can't wait" for the next chapter. Chapter 5 was posted some time ago - go look!

Gideon