Tips for helping my brother

[Brave_Wolfie]

I'll keep it simple here. I'm a pretty big man in both height and muscle, and I was hoping my younger brother would turn out the same in some aspects or at least be healthy to some degree. Well, to keep it short, it's not going so well. He eats and plays games all day, not to mention he's in a pretty unhealthy state. I hate to be that guy, but I'm just not happy with the way my brother takes care of himself. It's obvious that he wasn't exactly blessed with the same genes I have, so there's another problem.

Right now he's around 5'8" and weighs about 220 ibs. He doesn't show interest in changing that and he's already 18, unhealthy and unmotivated. I guess I'm hoping that if I got him to exercise somehow, he'd be a motivated or at least be healthy. I tried to get him to exercise or go on a diet, but he only sticks to the routine for a week or less. I try to be nice about it, but it's getting harder to just ignore the obvious.

What I'm asking for is something for a beginner. I tried to make him do what I did, but he's not me. Once I took to the treadmill and eventually the weights, I loved it. He obviously does not. So I suppose I'm asking for as many pointers as I can get to get him to realize what he's doing to him self as well as help him out. More importantly, tips on what a "large" person like him would enjoy doing regardless of how lazy he is or how picky he is with food. I've already gotten replies to my plea that went like "Just give up", but I'm sorry if I can't take that particular piece of advice.

[wolfotehmoon]

If he games, you might make some headway getting him Wii Fit or EA's new exercise game(though if he considers himself a "hardcore gamer" the chances are 50/50 he won't even touch a Wii >_>). I'd ask him first, it's kinda expensive... Otherwise, maybe he's just happy as he is. Do some passive things like trying to make it so that only healthy food is really in the house for him to eat.

[Brave_Wolfie]

He's a hardcore gamer. He bought the Wii and was sorely disappointed with it. I wish he'd play it more, he can get a decent work out by playing a good number of games on that thing. Or at least one that's better than sitting on his arse all day.

As for the food idea, I should have tried that earlier. I guess that's a good way to start out. But I highly doubt he's going to be slimming down if he just eats healthy...

[wolfotehmoon]

Some guys just aren't into getting big, and you really can't force him cuz he's 18. Best you can do is try to lead by example and set up a good environment, but I know when I was younger (15, but still), I deliberately avoided going to the gym because my entire family did.

[bRobertson]

Speaking for myself, one of the reasons I have an interest in fitness is purely practical: I like being able to do stuff. I take stairs two at a time with an heavy-ish school pack, keep up with a BSA troop on campouts, chop wood, carry crap around, etc. This has become my norm - if I can't do these things as well as I feel I ought, then the maintenance of that capability is what spurs me to get more active again.

The key here, I'd guess, is to demonstrate to him through his personal experience the benefits of being more physically active. To hell with getting big - start with getting outside. Throw a frisbee around, invite him on an easy walk after dinner. Make regular -as in daily - time for him in your life, encourage him to do something simple and easy every day. Pushing his personal limits isn't going to be a motivator for him; your best angles are fun and time. A bargain - one hour of gaming with him for a half-hour spent walking with you - may be useful.

After you've got him doing something basic for a few weeks, when he's had time to adapt to that, then bring up the idea of going further. The food thing is a good idea, but introduce it a few weeks after you start this program - you don't want to appear to be trying to trick him into doing what you want.

Hope that helps.

Bob R.

[bRobertson]

Originally Posted by bRobertson

After you've got him doing something basic for a few weeks, when he's had time to adapt to that, then bring up the idea of going further. Point out how his performance has improved, just by doing a slow walk every night - if he's as bad off as you say he is, fairly big gains are possible with fairly small changes. The food thing is a good idea, but introduce it a few weeks after you start this program - you don't want to appear to be trying to trick him into doing what you want.

Forgot the bolded part, couldn't find the edit button.

[WhoDunIt]

Is he mechanicly inclined in any way, if so you could try getting him into somehting radio control, that would atleast get him off the couch and wondering around on his feet plus still work his hand/eye co-ordination. Also does he eat at places like McDonalds alot, may try and convince him to go for the Dollar Menu instead of the Value menu. A dollar menu hamburger and small fries can run 250 calories a piece and if he gets tea instead of pop, that won't make anything worse calorie wise, but if he goes with the value menu the calorie count can climb anyware from near to over 1000 calories for the sandwich, fries, and a soft drink!

[Aarrow]

No advice here, just a comment or two. It's a shame that some siblings are into weightlifting and want to help but their siblings don't want the help whereas other siblings need the help but can't get it. As for me, I'm in the latter camp. I hope your brother accepts your help and advice.

[Brave_Wolfie]

For an update on his condition, he's beginning to "get" things now. Rather, a doctor told him to get on a scale and the doctor does a whistle that sounds like a cartoony anvil dropping. He's coming out with me when I go walking or go to the beach for swimming more often, so at least he's getting out of the house. I'd take him to the gym so he could do various exercises, but I think he gets discouraged when he sees guys who are more fit working out around him. Personally I'd be encouraged to work harder to be like em, but that's me. It's been about a week since he's been on this little program, and I won't lie, his stamina is on the pathetic side. I try to move slower than I ususally do to make it seem like he's doing good and I stop to rest when he does so he doesn't feel left out/alone when we're walking on a track. Though within a week, he has gotten a bit better with keeping up. I also keep track of the breaks he takes, and during the past two days he's taken two less breaks than when we first started. So maybe he's toughining up and getting serious, or I hope he is.

I also stopped buying bad foods for him and began replacing them with healthier alternitives. He would usually complain, but I guess he's a bit more focused on becoming healthier now. If he keeps going in this direction, he'll probably be 'fit enough' by the end of the year. Sure he won't be like me, but it's not like I want him to be me, I just want him to be healthy. Heart Attacks, High Blood Pressure and Diabetes runs in our family and being overweight is just asking to get one of those problems.

Oh and thanks for the advice. To be honest, I'm not the type of guy to compliment people, so I guess I gotta practice that if I want to encourage my brother to keep on keepin' on. The McDonald's info is also pretty handy seeing how we eat there whenever we lack the time for a proper meal (which is one or more times a week). I never really watched my calories, I just go "Oh, this looks and sounds healthy, so it must be good!". Yeah. So smart.

[WhoDunIt]

Glad to hear he's gotten serious and it already getting better, took my Mom becoming diabetic with a variety of aches and pains (now with a new knee and arthritus and tendonitus in her feet ), realising my family tree has the same issues as well as others in it, as well as a foot injury of my own to get me in the gym. While I'm still way overweight, even heavier then I was before, but I'm in much better shape as well as way stronger than before.

[WhoDunIt]

[quote]Oh and thanks for the advice. To be honest, I'm not the type of guy to compliment people, so I guess I gotta practice that if I want to encourage my brother to keep on keepin' on. The McDonald's info is also pretty handy seeing how we eat there whenever we lack the time for a proper meal (which is one or more times a week). I never really watched my calories, I just go "Oh, this looks and sounds healthy, so it must be good!". Yeah. So smart.
[quote/]

That's how I decided what I eat there now, I started looking at the crazy amount of calories in some of it (the big fries had as many calories as the sandwich!) and decided to use that to plan all following meals at those stores. What suprises me is how heavy some of the Chicken meals are in calories too. Not too sure what the protein is though, I'll have to look into it.