surprise, surprise!

[falseyedee]

my buddy has spent most of the summer doing physical therapy exercises for his shoulders, working his abs and hitting his legs hard. oh. my. god. what a difference this has made in his physique.

first off, he's lost some mass from his torso. his chest, arms and shoulders have all lost size. but his abs have improved alot. and his legs...oh, man, his legs are so much bigger: thicker than they've ever been. he's able to do that freaky thing that big bodybuilders can do: flap his relaxed quad muscles around then pop them into sharp relief with a quick hard flex. he's developed that big tear drop muscle over his knees. i don't know what that muscle is called, but it's hot.

with the reduction in his torso size and the increase in his leg size, his body is now much more symmetrical and better balanced. and his ass is just amazing from all the squats he's been cranking out.

when we got together this summer, i focussed most of my attention on his abs and legs. it was so much fun to see his abs and legs improve. i came to know his legs in much greater detail than before. generally, i'm all about his pecs and biceps. i love the way a big chest and arms makes a man look powerful. and i love the strength my buddy had and could demonstrate.

changing my focus to coincide with his summer's focussed training opened my eyes to the power and strength in a man's legs and abs. i mean, appreciated good legs and tight abs, but now i can say that i understand that power in a much more visceral way. watching his legs grow and their shape change this summer was intense. and finding myself embraced within the ever stronger and more crushing grip of his sissor grips this summer literally took my breath away!

his weight had dropped some after he injured himself. but he's managed to keep his weight from dropping much below 215 and he looks terrific. now, with the okay from his doctor and physical therapist, he's just started training again with the training partner he'd been working out with in june. he is totally jazzed with the improvements he's seen in his legs over the summer and, though he's frustrated with the losses in size, realizes that his body is going to be even better now that his "wheels" have caught up with his "guns".

as excited as he is to get back to working his entire body, i am just as excited. i can't wait to watch his body start growing again. i can't wait to experience how much stronger he's going to become. this training partner, whom i haven't met yet, sounds like he's as intensly dedicated to gaining size and strength as my buddy. i think it's going to be a great fall! i'll keep you all posted.

[1bigwoof]

Thanks for sharing the good news....think your buddy might now compete since his physique is more balanced? Either way, I'm sure you'll be enjoying the fruits of his continued labors!

[arpeejay]

I bet he's at 230 by the end of the year! :-)

xoxo

Richard

[falseyedee]

that would be wicked cool, as my bostonian friends say! he looks pretty amazing now. so much better than i ever did when i was competing. i get all confused: turn on, proud, jealous, happy. must get back to the gym myself.

[falseyedee]

the last month has been sooooo cool. my buddy started training his torso again after a summer of physical therapy for his shoulders and some intense leg training. i was wrong about his weight. even though he'd been training his legs for much of the summer, his total weight had still dropped from 221 in july down to 211 back at the start of september. given how much his legs improved, his weight must have been even lower before he started training legs.

anyway, in the last month or so, he's been working out doing a bulking routine again, trying to get his size back up. and he's been pretty damned successful.

this is where the benefits of "muscle memory" come in. lifting heavy, spurred on by his new training partner and eating like a horse, he's managed to blow up to 218 pounds already! his arms have gone from 18 back up to 18-1/2. his chest has gone from 46-1/2 back up to 47-1/2. he has lost some of the definition he had, but the additional size makes up for it.

he is just like "mr. thickness" now. it is really hot. his training partner has him doing powerlifting type lifts for strength. lots of compound lifts, too. he's still not lifting as much weight as he was when he injured himself, but he is doing the lifts with better form, so it's probably better anyway. when he starts doing more of a body building, muscle isolation type training again, i think he'll see another spurt of growth.

but this month has been just awesome, watching him pack on that kind of size that quickly. he's really happy to be training again and working with his training partner really makes a difference in his focus and provides the dual motivation of a support and a competitor. he claims that he's not competitive. hah! he lies. he's very competitive. he always wants to do better than the last time he lifted and wants to lift more and more reps than anybody around him.

me...i'm just loving his increasing strength and his increasing size. when he couldn't train his torso, he couldn't lift me. i kinda missed that. but now that he's training again, he's lifting me again. that's so hot! so far we haven't tried gorilla lifts or bench pressing me yet, but he has picked me up in bear hugs and generally tossed me around like a rag doll again. i love those displays of strength!. as for size, he was still a big guy at 211. but bigger is better when it's mostly muscle! i'm pretty sure he'll be over 220 again by the end of october. he's already thinking he should be either conan or the hulk for halloween. i vote for the hulk, just so i could see him literally "hulk" out of the clothes he'd be wearing.

i'll keep you all posted!

[Lifter73]

Okay, I'll be the first to state.....

PICS!!!

D

[arpeejay]

False, I think it's time for an update, babe!

xoxo

Richard

[falseyedee]

richard,

i'll try to update my buddy's progress this week. things are pretty hectic, but he's made some progress and i've got tales to tell!

[Mdlftr]

I second that (e)motion --- Bring us up to date, Falseeyedee!


Mdlftr

[joeylawrencefan]

We are so overdue for an update!

[falseyedee]

Hey, I’m sorry I haven’t been able to update. Between life being pretty busy, then getting sick over the holidays, and then having to catch up at work, things have been pretty hectic.

It’s only been like 3-1/2 months since my last post. Back then, my buddy weighed 218 pounds and was training using more power lifting type training for strength. He continued that through October and returned to more traditional bodybuilding training in November. When he made the switch he weighed 222 pounds. In the last month and a half, he’s managed to both increase his weight and somewhat improve his definition and vascularity.

As of last weekend, my buddy weighs 228 pounds. For a guy who is 5’-11” tall, that is a lot of muscle. And he looks terrific. He’s still carrying some fat from the bulking phase that he just finished, but with as big as his muscles are, he doesn’t look “fat” at all, it just gives his body a smoothness that tends to add to the roundness of his muscles. He doesn’t look soft at all, and I can attest to the fact that he’s as solid and hard as a brick wall.

With his chest measuring over 48 inches and his waist almost 35 inches he wants to see if he can drop some of that fat to get his waist smaller again. His “gut”, such as it is, is lacking the kind of definition that he’s normally had in the past. But, when he flexes his abs his 6 pack is still very clear. He thinks that what he wants to do is lean out for the summer.

His biceps have really gotten bigger, they both measure 19 inches cold and flexed. The mounds of muscle are more than just show muscle, too. My God, is he strong! The last time we got together, he grabbed me under the arms, leaned back a hair and pressed me up and down for reps!

And I’m not light. Actually, I’m embarrassed to say that I weigh as much as he does. And, though there is some muscle there from my days bodybuilding and training, I’m not in shape anymore. And he just lifted me up like I was a little kid: pressing me up and down with ease. I loved it!

As he pressed me up and down, I watched his pecs and shoulders get flushed with blood and pump up in size. When he was finished with his set, he tossed me casually onto the bed and flexed, doing a most muscular pose. God, what a pose for him! If I hadn’t already been laying down, my knees would have gone weak. He’s such a hot muscle man.

I never thought I’d be into being lifted and carried. But, it is hot. It does take some skill as well as strength on the part of my friend, and I have to be cooperative, keeping still, sometimes holding myself rigid, depending on how he’s lifting me. But it is so amazing. It’s an experience of somebody else’s strength that you just can’t get any other way.

More later!

[arpeejay]

About time for an update, right?

xoxo

Richard

[falseyedee]

We’re coming up on almost six months since my last update. I can’t believe it’s already June. Spring has been hell, really. My aunt died, my step brother was diagnosed with cancer, my mother had a heart attack. And those are just the major events. So I haven’t been able to attend to everything the way I normally would.

One of those things that’s had to take a back seat has been getting together with my buddy. We’d chat on the phone and email, but hadn’t been able to get together. Until the long Memorial Day weekend.

I hadn’t seen him in like 4-1/2 or 5 months, but I went over to his place for a BBQ just to hang out with him and friends. My God, what a fucking amazing day that turned into.

First, my buddy is a fucking stud. I can’t tell you how awesome he looks now. He says he weighs 234 pounds now, but I’d swear he must be pushing 240. His muscles are big, round, hard, vascular…and that’s when he’s relaxed and not even pumped! He is just a massive slab of grade A prime beef right now. He’s leaned out some since January, too, so I think with his tighter waist and the additional size, he just looks massive.

Second, I got to finally meet his training partner. It’s his ex boyfriend! I know I’ve posted about him in the past. They had a bad break up and his ex hit the gym and transformed himself into something of a muscle hunk gaining a good 30 or 40 pounds before I lost track of him. Well apparently they met up at the gym and after a brief period of awkwardness, realized that they could function in proximity to one another. Then they decided that they could try working out together and have managed to resume a friendship based on their shared past and their shared obsession with getting bigger.

The ex is so transformed that I didn’t even recognize him. He’s about the same height as my buddy, but he’s olive skinned and dark haired with just a hint of grey starting to show, where as my buddy is more like a surfer blonde type coloring. I think the last time I saw the ex was on the street years ago looking buff, weighing, I don’t know, maybe 190 pounds or so.

Well, now he’s even bigger, damn near as big as my buddy, at around 230 pounds. He’s not quite as lean and has much bigger legs than my buddy, so his upper body isn’t as big. The ex doesn’t shave his body either, like my buddy does, so he’s got hair on his chest and arms and legs and just has a more rough and dangerous vibe about him.

There were a couple of other people from the gym there. I hadn’t been around this much muscle since my bodybuilding days when I competed. I was, honestly, the only guy there who wasn’t a total muscle stud. Even the small guys there were hot and far more muscular than me.

There was no hiding the fact that all that muscle turned me on. I swear I had an erection the whole afternoon. And my buddy introduced me to everybody as not just a “muscle queen”, but as “MW” for “muscle worshipper” which is what he calls me. So that’s what everybody called me, “MW”. It was hot. Guys flexed for me and let me touch their washboard abs and squeeze their biceps. The afternoon was so much fun. It gave me SO many ideas for stories I can’t tell you. But even the reality of being surrounded by almost a dozen guys ranging in age from 24 to 40, white, black, Asian, tall, short, all of them gay, and every single one of them at least muscular, if not outright massive, was such a thrill…and not a little frustrating.

Now, I really need to get some time alone with my buddy so I can show him the worshipful devotion he deserves!

[rocketdog]

That does sound like a great weekend! Thanks for sharing.

[hoosierlifter]

That's a fantasy come true for most of the guys on this board. I wish I could have that kind of luck.

[Mdlftr]

I enjoyed the update, but I had a question about some of the terminology. Maybe this is a stupid question about something obvious, but whe Falseyedee says,

Originally Posted by falseyedee

everybody as not just a ?muscle queen?, but as ?MW? for ?muscle worshipper? which is what he calls me. So that?s what everybody called me, ?MW?.

What is the whole distinction he is making about a "muscle queen" versus a "muscle worshipper"? What is that about?

What's a muscle queen? Is that someone who is gay, but acts all effeminate around muscle? Or is it just a gay guy who happens to like muscle? Or is it the fact that he's getting "turned on" about it? I don't get the terminology.

If someone could explain, I'd appreciate it. (Seriously!)

Thanks,

Mdlftr

[falseyedee]

a "muscle queen", is a gay man who is attracted to muscle men...mostly exclusively attracted to muscle men. similar term: "rice queen", a gay man who is mostly exclusively attracted to Asian men.

a "muscle worshipper" is into the roll of worshipping the muscle man in addition to being attracted to the muscle man.

as least that's how i've understood the terms, and how i meant them to be "read". sorry, sometimes we really do need a glossary!

the terms are fairly common in the sf bay area...not sure about elsewhere.

[arpeejay]

Six weeks later...

Time for an update? Is he up to 240 yet?

xoxo

Richard

[arpeejay]

Hmm. More than 3 months since we last heard about your Big Friend, MW. Favor us with an update?!

xoxo

Richard

[msldan]

My goodness, your descriptions are hot, falseyedee. Have you seen your friend recently? Is he bigger?

[arpeejay]

<< bump >>

We need an update, please!

xoxo

Richard

[falseyedee]

this is a quick update just to let people know that i'm alive. at the end of last year, i caught the so called swine flu followed by a drug resistant pneumonia and ended up in the hospital for 3 months, 40 days of which were spent in intensive care including 2 weeks in a coma. they told my partner and my mother that i only had about a 20% chance of surviving.

i did manage to come through it, though. the doctors and nurses were amazing and i owe them my life. i was discharged from the hospital weighing 60 pounds less than i did going in. i spent the next three months on disability and going to physical therapy. i have only back been at work full time for about two months.

surviving something like this gives you a whole new perspective on life and priorities. so i am making changes.

one thing i'm not changing is my relationship with my buddy. he was an angel: a musclebound angel, visiting me every day, my mother tells me, and he helped me out immensely when i returned home. i couldn't climb the stairs to my house and he lifted me up and carried me in. if i hadn't been so weak, that would have been a total turn on. he helped by sitting with me and driving me around to doctor's appointments and physical therapy, giving my partner a break.

i'm still sorting out what this all means, but i'm back, probably not as often. if you are a current member of my musclefiction.com site, you'll be hearing from me personally in the next week or so.

[arpeejay]

Very sorry to hear of your illness, Falseyedee. The virtual world has the schizophrenic quality of letting us get to know (and admire and enjoy) people we've never set eyes on and know nothing about otherwise. Do realize that you are definitely one of those "enjoy and admire" people and know that we're all immensely relieved to hear that you're doing much, much better.

Take care & please keep us posted.

xoxo

Richard

[CelticMuscle]

Originally Posted by falseyedee

this is a quick update just to let people know that i'm alive. at the end of last year, i caught the so called swine flu followed by a drug resistant pneumonia and ended up in the hospital for 3 months, 40 days of which were spent in intensive care including 2 weeks in a coma. they told my partner and my mother that i only had about a 20% chance of surviving.

Does this mean that you can now have a second career as "The Man who survived a Hospital derived infection" on American talk shows? I am glad to hear that you are now back around (and would like to know when you will be able to hit the gym again)?

[1bigwoof]

Welcome back...we missed you. I hope your recovery continues to progress nicely.

[ottomun6]

Wow, glad to hear you got around the H1N1 and a coma! Hope you have a quick and full recovery.
Hey don't forget to pack on some muscles to show off later in pics ;-)

[falseyedee]

hey, thanks, everybody, for the kind words. i so appreciate your comments. it is a joy to be alive. really.

[falseyedee]

I thought I should give you all an update of sorts. I am still alive. After what I?ve gone through, I am really appreciative of every single day that I wake up. It really is a blessing.

When I got sick, I weighed about 215 pounds. I had worked really hard that summer to slim down some. If I?d known what was coming, I wouldn?t have worked so hard at it. After all that time in the hospital, I lost another 60 pounds. I can tell you, I hadn?t weighed 155 pounds since I was a sophomore in high school. I?ve since gained back a little more than 20 pounds. I still feel like a shadow of my former bodybuilding self.

After having been big and buff, and then big and kind of turning into a daddy of sorts, being this small again is weird. Physical therapy has made me, although in a much better place than I was when I got out of the hospital, painfully aware of how small and weak I am now compared to where I used to be.

My buddy outweighs me by about 75 pounds. He?s about 250. I feel absolutely puny next to him. His muscles just dwarf me. His biceps are just about 20 inches now. They compare pretty nicely to my thighs. No joke. His fore arms are so much bigger than my arms, it isn?t even funny. If I could get my arms as big as they were before I was sick, my arms would still be smaller than his fore arms are now. It?s really amazing and seriously hot.

What I wanted to talk about, though, is another guy. I had started to get together with one of the muscle guys I met last year at my buddy?s 4th of July party. He?s a different kind of muscle man from my buddy. I?ll call him Lou. Lou is a petite Asian with a super lean and incredibly muscular gymnast?s physique. He?s about 5?-5? tall, 4 inches shorter than I am, and he weights 152 ripped pounds.

Unlike my buddy, Lou is a natural show off. The first time we got together, at a Thai restaurant in the Castro, he flexed for me at the table! He flexed his biceps and squeezed his pecs together. His short sleeve shirt, a thin cotton button up, was so small, there was no hiding all the muscle. He said he knew I liked muscle and so what did I think? Cripes. It was hot. Well, that set the course for our friendship.

Now that I?m so much smaller and weaker than I was when we first met. Even though I currently out weigh him by about 20 pounds, he is so much stronger than I am. He has a tiny waist, with the sickest abs that make his big round pecs look huge. And Lou?s nearly 16 inch arms are bigger than mine by a long shot. He?s picked me up and carried me around the room, crushing me in his bear hug. I can barely lift him. It?s insane.

I know I?ve been sick and have lost a LOT of size and strength. But when Lou, who is so much smaller than I am, can pick me up and carry me so easily, and wrestle me into submission using his muscles, it just plays with my head because he is so much smaller than me and a year ago it never would have happened. It?s weird. It?s disturbing. I?m not sure I ?like? it exactly. I don?t. But, it is really hot. And that is an interesting realization.

Lou loves to show off how strong he is and is shameless about flaunting his amazing body. His attitude is a change from my buddy?s natural shyness and modesty. This is a new experience and I?m kinda going with it?and enjoying it.

[Mdlftr]

Falseeyedee,

I am glad to hear you survived the infection and subsquent weight loss. Don't get down on yourself. I have some idea of what you're going through --- I had skull base surgery for a non-malignant brain tumor in 2009, and haven't been able to work out for 17 months. Believe me, I know what that's like!

I recently (last week) got back into the gym and am working with a trainer again. This is crucial because I am still experiencing post-surgical complications (severe headaches, controlled by meds) which made it very difficult to work out totally on my own. I haven't lost much weight - I went from a high of around 213# at 6'3" to a low of 200# at the same height. Because I work in the city and take the subway and walk everywhere downtown, I have kept my waist in check. In fact, this summer I've even taken my belt in a few notches (from the wintertime spread!).

I am not in any kind of muscular shape-- nothing like I was approaching before my surgery. I deliberately stepped up the pace of my workouts before surgery to give me the reserves I needed to get through the 10-hour surgery. It really made a difference. Now, I am committed to getting back into shape AND to increasing my size over what I was before surgery.

Will it be a long slog? YES Will it be difficult with potential for plenty of set backs? YES. I know all that and am committed to keeping up the work to achieve my goals of becoming more muscularly proportionate.

You'll get your muscle mass back. In just two workouts of about 45 minutes each with the trainer, my arms, legs, pecs, lats, waist and back have all tightened and toned up quite a bit. My hamstrings are no where near as flat as they've been for the last year, and my arms are firm again. It's AMAZING how quickly your body can adjust!

You'll be big and strong again. Just give yourself time!

Mdlftr (been there, doing that)

[1bigwoof]

Mdlftr & Falseydee,

Thanks for sharing your trials with us. What courage the two of you are showing through overcoming your illnesses. It makes the rest of us who have simply been lazy realize how lucky we really are. Best of luck with your returns to the gym.

[sergel02]

Glad you guys are getting better. even tho this may be slightly off topic, how are you kept healthy during the time in coma and such? I imagine it was strange waking up finding yourself much thinner than normally. was it any type of weight you lost more so than others? like muscle, fat, bone density? My friend who is a bodybuilder recently went into a coma. the doctors think he'll wake up eventually, its just a matter of time

[falseyedee]

a quick update. i have been quiet for a while. preparing my second book for publication both as a physical book and a kindle file has taken up some time, but i'm also writing a novel. it's a tropical science-fantasy adventure featuring lots of muscle. that has really sucked up much of my time.

my buddy and i still get together on a regular basis, but more for just hanging out right now. he's still training hard and looking fabulous. i don't think he's gained any weight, but the quality and shapes of his muscle are really improving. i see lou sometimes. i'd like to see him more often. he's such a cocky show off, with a dominant streak that my buddy doesn't have, that even though he's smaller than my buddy, our worship sessions together are really fun.

i have joined the ranks of the unemployed this week. there just isn't enough work in the office to support all the project managers, so two of us have been let go. *sigh* with a mortgage to pay, not to mention the accumulated "copay" from my medical misadventure, i need to spend most of my time looking for a job. on the other hand, without a day job, i will have more time to write!

[arpeejay]

BUMP

How are YOU doing? How are your friends doing?

We want to know!

xoxo

Richard

[falseyedee]

thankfully, i am still alive. it's been just over a year since i got out of the hospital and i'm back up to a healthy weight (185). i'm not as big as i used to be and i'm not working out. my waist is about 34 inches. my chest is about 40 inches and my arms are about 14-1/2 inches. i feel tiny. but that's okay with me right now. i'm still unemployed, coming up on the three month mark, and i'm really just focused on looking for work and working on the muscle adventure novel, among other things.

my buddy is still training, but he's also kind of hit a plateau. his weight fluctuates between 240 and 260 depending on his diet and how much cardio he's doing. while i do like the definition he has when he's lighter, i think i prefer the bulkier look on him. his abs are either an astonishing washboarded 8 pack, or a slightly swollen but defined 6 pack depending on his waist measurement which fluctuates between 32 and 34 inches. his chest is fluctuating between 50 and 53 inches. His biceps when he's lighter measure just shy of 20 inches, but swell up beautifully to over 22 inches when he's heavier.

he has actually gotten back together with his ex. so i guess i shouldn't call his ex "ex" anymore. the ex is still kind of a drama queen, but since he's focused so much of his energy in his training, he is a lot easier to be around. they work out together almost every day. the formerly ex boy friend has slowly reshaped his physique quite successfully. 18 months or so ago when my buddy reintroduced me to him as his training partner, he was about 230 pounds about the same weight as my buddy, but with bigger legs, a smaller torso and not as lean as my buddy.

he has managed to gain about another 10 pounds, but he's also leaned out and gained much better definition. he works really hard to maintain his physique in a more or less constant level of conditioning. his stomach is always ripped to shreds with a 32 inch waist and a 51 inch chest. His thighs are huge, much bigger than my buddy's legs, and rippling with heavy, defined muscle all the time. his arms are also pretty constantly 20 inches or so.

my "little friend", lou has changed the most physically. he was a ripped, gymnast like muscle man when we first met. he's short and weighed just over 150 back then. well a few months after we met he started a major bulking effort, loved the weight and size he gained and basically switched his training from bodybuilding to powerlifting type training.

today he weighs as much as i do. his waist went from a cobbled 28 to a 34 inch muscle gut. his chest has grown from around 41 to 45 inches. his arms have gone from under 16 inches to over 18 inches. he's just a fucking tank. he looks like a tiny sumo wrestler sometimes. he moves like one, too. he is stronger, pound for pound, than anybody i know. honestly, he can bear hug my buddy and my buddy cannot break the hold. lou just loves how strong he is and although i personally don't find powerlifters' physiques sexy, i find his cockiness and displays of brute strength totally hot.

i long ago realized that as my buddy started training and getting bigger, and surpassed my size, that being the smaller guy had it's own set of charms and thrills. when i was a bodybuilder, over 200 pounds and cocky and the one turning heads and attracting attention that was pretty cool. i liked the attention and i loved showing off. i enjoyed comparing myself to smaller guys and seeing how much bigger i was than they were. but when my buddy got bigger, that introduced me to a whole new world of being the smaller, appreciative guy. the first time he called me "m-w", for "muscle worshipper", was an erotic thrill of it's own. it still is.

now i am basically the smallest and weakest guy in my group of friends. it is a complete change of role. because i was so sick and nearly died, all my friends are very protective of me now. it's really wonderful to feel protected and cared for by all these massive muscle men. i don't miss being the biggest guy. i love being surrounded by all the muscle. a group hug, me sandwiched between my buddy and his formerly ex boy friend, with lou wrapping his big arms around all of our waists, with me getting squashed by all that hard, strong muscle is just about the best thing ever!

[Muscled_Jamie]

Great to see you back, Falsey. You have a great story line going here. I especially like the lean muscle guys, so I enjoy hearing updates on Lou. Keep at it, Man! Best-Jamie

[CanadianGordon]

Wicked. Any pictures of these guys as huge as they are? Though you do a damned good job explaining what they look like normally..

[arpeejay]

Update time? How are you doing? How are the musclebuds?

xoxo

Richard

[falseyedee]

prompted by a kind note from a forum member, i thought i'd drop in and say "hi". life on the left coast has been difficult. i am now in month 9 of unemployment. looking for work consumes a couple hours out of pretty much every day. then i write. i've got some work out under my real name and that has been very gratifying, though not paying much. i'm continuing to work on that.

i think i'll also be moving some of my falseyedee writing off the back burner in the next couple of weeks. so maybe there may be another collection of short stories out soon. the muscle growth novel i was working on is in the midst of a major rewrite having decided to make some significant changes to one of the characters. it meant changing the nature of relationships between most of the characters, so that's definitely a "work in progress".

you could say the same about me. it's been a while since i was ill and lost most of my mass and size. my weight is still stable at about 185. i am in no way muscular any more. it has been pointed out to me that muscle memory is a real thing and that if i wanted to get bigger, with a return to the gym, i could be big again.

my own desires though seem to be writ in shifting sands. one day i am ecstatic being the shorter, smaller, weaker guy worshiping my buddy and his ex ex. the next day i am thrilled to be the taller but smaller, weaker guy being dominated by a shorter more massively muscular guy. and the day after that i long to be the bigger, taller, stronger man surrounded by small, lithe and lean muscle twinks worshiping my magnificent muscles. conflicted much?

but, as money is tight, i won't be getting bigger any time soon, as things other than the gym have priority these days.

i do very much enjoy hanging out with my buddy and his ex ex and their muscular friends. the swirl of massive and growing men who come and go around us is sometimes intoxicating. i'll meet somebody new whose physique is different from my buddy's bodybuilder physique or lou's powerlifter physique, somebody with a body like a gymnast or a cyclist or just a wildly beautiful gym body and it's like i have muscular OCD, ooh, muscles! and off i scamper chasing a new wonderful muscle man. it's fun and it's weird and i wonder at what age this will become kind of sad.

[arpeejay]

So glad to see your post!

I think it's safe to say that just about everyone here has "Muscular OCD, oooh, Muscles!" It's just a matter of what we do with it!

I'm still trying to figure it out and I imagine that will always be the case.

Hang in there!

xoxo

Richard

[philipabraham]

Nice one.Thanks a lot for sharing.