My Brother, The Vampire RP (Excerpt)

[Caliguy]

Ok, I'll probably end up deleting this post. But I just really wanted to post this because I have been a member of this community for YEARS (this forum and muscle growth stories on yahoo before that) and I have never posted a single thing. I wanted to show my appreciation and give a little something back, although the fear of criticism and story regulations imposed due to those criticisms has held me back. Hopefully this post will remain and I will end up posting more than just this.

All of the characters in this RP are mine, so there is no concern over privacy infringement. Technically, that makes this a story rather than an RP transcript. But I wanted to try writing in this style over standard prose as I prefer unique conventions. I hope you enjoy :).



*Gavin walks into his room having just got back from work. The bulky twenty-one year old removes his shirt, preparing for a shower*

*Mike grins at his brother's preoccupation causing him to miss the fact that he is sitting in the chair next to the door. "Hey bro. What's up?"

Gavin: *startles* Whoa, fuck! What the heck are you doing in here?? I know you're a vampire now and all, but you don't have to stalk me. Get outta here. I'm gonna take a shower.

Mike: I don't mind. I wouldn't mind watching. Or joining in if you wanted me to for that matter.

Gavin: Look. It's hard enough for mom and dad and I to accept this vampire thing. I don't need you to be gay on top of it. Unless you're just acting, in which case, stop it.

Mike: *still grinning, he stands and steps over to his brother* I'm afraid that's not possible, as you're about to see. But more importantly, I have something very special for you.

Gavin: I don't want it. Whatever it is, I don't want it.

*Mike looks deeply into his eyes and commands him* "You do want this. You want this really badly."

Gavin: *entranced* I do want it... I want it really badly... Oh god, I need it so bad. Please give it to me. Please give it to me Mike!

*Mike reaches around and drops Gavin's shorts; fondling his ass as he leans in to kiss his brother deeply. As they make out, Mike guides him to sit down on the bed*

*Gavin begins to moan as he is kissed and reciprocates with a quickly building lust*

*Mike continues to make out with his brother and as he does so Gavin's body starts to change as his musculature swells and defines. The growth is short lived, but the increase is significantly noticeable. As the muscle growth finishes, Mike reaches down to Gavin's now hard dick and gently strokes it*

*Gavin keeps moaning into Mike's mouth as his hips start to buck slightly into the hand strokes*

*Mike paces his hand job and as he fondles Gavin, the prick in his hand also enlarges until the once five inch prick is a hefty eight inch rod. Continuing to stroke, Mike straddles Gavin's lap and breaks away from his mouth only to begin kissing his way down the side of his neck and along his shoulder. An instant later, Mike suddenly bares his fangs and sinks them into Gavin's neck to drink deeply. As he does so, Gavin is flooded with a sense of euphoria, rather than agony*

*Gavin cries out in ecstasy and helplessly cums uncontrollably while he's still being stroked*

*Mike feeds and notes that the size of Gavin's load is considerably larger than average. Somewhere around sixteen shots later, Gavin would finally finish his orgasm and be significantly drained fro the intensity of of it, and the loss of blood. Although Gavin was in absolutely no danger, Mike laid his body down upon the bed to rest after licking his bite marks to heal them closed. Now Mike removed his clothes and laid down with Gavin. Still working his enchantment, he resumed his commands* "When you wake up, you will only remember us having sex and how much you enjoyed it. Sleep now."

*Gavin closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep contently*

*Mike closes his eyes to rest also, with a grin still on his face as he imagines how fun Gavin's reaction will be once he wakes up*

[vga518]

First off: DON'T DELETE THIS! Never be ashamed of your work.
Second: This was actually very good and very well written. I'd love to read the whole thing.
Third: Keep Going, Keep Writing

[Jockmorphr]

Cool start to an interesting story! I also think its nice that you chose to share something with the community here. Thanks!

[baremuscle]

This is a totally erotic story. Your work is good. Keep it up.

[Caliguy]

I just wanted to say thank you to those who have responded to this so positively. Since this posting I have debated over if, how, and when I would post more. Unfortunately, I have come to the conclusion that I will continue to keep my work to myself. The deciding factor for me was that there was a story recently posted here by kenstaff, who felt as though he should not share his work because his character was under 18 and so removed his story. This is exactly the kind of thing that has held me back from contributing here sooner. I love this forum and respect its rules 100%.

But back when I first started writing the general consensus was that you should just write what you love and if other people liked it, great. If not, they could find something else to read. However, for some reason certain themes have become so offensive to some people that they have become entitled to getting them banned. As I wrote this excerpt I was so worried about if it would be deleted or not because "some people don't like vampires" or "some people don't like incest" or "some people don't like under aged characters" - which I ultimately changed for that reason, but hate the fact I had to do so. Anyone who is a writer knows how hard it is to write in the first place due to the inner critic. To have outer critics on top of that makes it that much worse.

In conclusion, my point is that I completely respect the rules of this forum and its right to be run however the owner sees fit. I will continue to be a member and enjoy the work of all the great authors who post here. I will keep this post up since people have enjoyed it. Yet it saddens me to think how many good authors of this community may be out there and do not get a chance to be enjoyed for all the personal reasons I have mentioned.

[vga518]

Originally Posted by Caliguy

I just wanted to say thank you to those who have responded to this so positively. Since this posting I have debated over if, how, and when I would post more. Unfortunately, I have come to the conclusion that I will continue to keep my work to myself on my personal blog. The deciding factor for me was that there was a story recently posted here by kenstaff, who felt as though he should not share his work because his character was under 18 and so removed his story. This is exactly the kind of thing that has held me back from contributing here sooner. I love this forum and respect its rules 100%.

But back when I first started writing the general consensus was that you should just write what you love and if other people liked it, great. If not, they could find something else to read. However, for some reason certain themes have become so offensive to some people that they have become entitled to getting them banned. As I wrote this excerpt I was so worried about if it would be deleted or not because "some people don't like vampires" or "some people don't like incest" or "some people don't like under aged characters" - which I ultimately changed for that reason, but hate the fact I had to do so. Anyone who is a writer knows how hard it is to write in the first place due to the inner critic. To have outer critics on top of that makes it that much worse.

In conclusion, my point is that I completely respect the rules of this forum and its right to be run however the owner sees fit. I will continue to be a member and enjoy the work of all the great authors who post here. I will keep this post up since people have enjoyed it. Yet it saddens me to think how many good authors of this community may be out there and do not get a chance to be enjoyed for all the personal reasons I have mentioned.

I know what you mean and I agree with what you are saying. It saddens me that you won't be sharing your works on the forum here as it looks like you have a firm writing esthetic. It is hard to write but then to have someone tell you to change it is the most hurtful thing that could be said to an author. I would like to say that I personally would love to read your work, whether thru PM or email, or IM. I would like to. Shooting ideas around or even brainstorming, because for me writing is a bit harder compared to many here who have or seem to have a flow. I am glad that you won't delete this excerpt, it was quite interesting and hot. Hope I can read the whole thing someday somehow. Let me know,
As many people on here say: Keep Writing

[Caliguy]

Again, thank you for the encouraging words. Anyway, be good to each other :).

[nights22003]

wow thats a really cool story, im not usually one for vampires but it really was nicely done! congratz, makes me think twice bout vamps :3