Be Careful What You Wish For III __ So Long Sucker!

[R Chris Cooper]

This story has been removed by the author.

[Mass Driver]

Well thanks a lot.
You've finally made a character that I completely hate.
Your Mike character can go straight to hell.
He stole the main charcters freedom and as if that wasn't enough,
he turns around and steels his size.
I hope this isn't the direction you are going in.
I've loved your stories up to this point.
But that little shit coming back after aching to leave is just crap.
Sorry if that sounds a bit much.
It is a testament to your writing that it gets a strong reaction.
But I have to tell you that when I read that Mike was back,
I skimed over the rest of it till I read where he srunk the main character.
Putting Mike back in the story did nothing for my frustration level.
And I don't think the main character is happier either.

But for heaven's sake please do...
Keep Writing.

MD

[Rarity]

I'm pretty much in agreement with Mass Driver on this one, from start to finish of his post. It was surely an odd story because of (the jerk)Mike and the concept/plot, but most certainly not a bad one. . . You can't help but feel REALLY bad for the main character, though.

[R Chris Cooper]

I wanted Mike to be a villain that forced muscle on Eric and then like a bad ass he took some of it away. At least Eric didn't revert to his old self. If I continue the story Mike will get what is coming to him. I don't like to kill characters but I could make an exception in Mike's case.

I am truly sorry that you were so disappointed. I had a hard time writing the last chapter. I just wanted Eric to be able to escape but as I was writing it didn't seem to turn out that way.

Either way Eric was bound to lose. Since Mike came back he now lost the muscle but he is free to go back to his old life more muscular than when he arrived. If he leaves he will lose his true love (Pete).

Not all stories have a happy ending and there are people like Mike all over the world.

Not many people leave me feedback and it is good to know that you see the injustice of what Mike has done in this story.

I may have painted myself into a corner with this story. It may be best to go on to the next tale. Tell me if you want to see a resolution to this conflict between Mike and Eric.

Coop

[Ctopher]

I think Mike should be stuck there but with a small puny body.

And for Eric have him go through a process that the original guys went through back when there was no one to trade with.

[Tundy]

There'always a way to make happy endings but I like this story so far it's suspenseful now. I think something bad should happen to Mike but not too drastic unless its the only way. Drama is fun!

[Mdlftr]

Hey, bringing the Mike character back into the story to literally F*ck with the narrator was interesting. It kind of makes me wonder how this whole set up works. As long as you stay in the station building and grounds, you apparently do not age and get more muscular. Yet, you are also stuck in the space. Except Mike can apparently come and go as he pleases.

It doesn't make a lot of sense, but then, that doesn't seem to be the point. Pete still likes the narrator, so he is still ahead of the game. Whatever Mike is up to seems to have no bearing on the narrator's relationship with Pete.

Interesting twists in this story. I continue to be amazed and impressed at the number of story scenarios you keep posting.

Mdlftr

[R Chris Cooper]

Originally Posted by Mdlftr

As long as you stay in the station building and grounds, you apparently do not age and get more muscular. Yet, you are also stuck in the space. Except Mike can apparently come and go as he pleases.

It doesn't make a lot of sense, but then, that doesn't seem to be the point.

Mdlftr

Yes you are right about eternal youth as long as you stay on the property. More to come on that.


At the beginning of the story Mike transfers his muscle to Eric (the narrator) and that frees Mike to leave. I allude to the fact that Mike has some unfinished business to take care of in the outside world and the muscle transfer was the only way he can get off the property to take care of business. Mike comes back assuming that he will get his muscle back but it doesn't happen that way.

I guess I will try to continue the story and resolve some of this with another twist or two.

Coop

[Hanugumo]

I agree with everyone that I'm not happy at the reappearance of Mike & that he stole a lot of Eric's muscles & height + size of endowedment. But is your last comment when you said that Mike had unfinished business to take care off, that does make me understand a bit of why he acted the way he did. <=/

Tbh, I hope Eric stays. Even though he is now practically free of the curse. <=3 He & Pete should be together for ever, though I do believe that Eric does age now that he is techniquely released of the curse. <=/ Or am I wrong about this?

Well, I hope to read the answers in the next chapter/chapters. Good luck with everything and hope to see said chapters someday soon. ^^