Overcoming in the gym

[hulkoutlvr]

Well, I've had two sessions with the personal trainer now, and I've been in the gym for a week and a half. So far, not much is happening with the iron. Oh, I'm very good at the cardio part of it; losing weight is what I do best. I'm now at 135 and counting. But last night I did legs with the trainer, and that was even more of a body fry than the upper body workout we did last week. Of course it didn't help matters any that a branch warren look alike who seemed to be flexing with every movement he made was working out right next to where we were. Even my trainer has this incredible body, and the whole time we were working together, I'm sure he was thinking 'what am I messing with this little wimp for?". Of course the four sessions came as a part of my package, so I'm sure the gym is paying him well for the time he is 'wasting'. Therefore, I don't feel guilty about taking his time.

I went back and tried to lift tonight after I did my 45 min of cardio. I went to the chest press machine, to find that someone (I can only assume Lou Ferrigno, lol), had left 4 forty five pound weights on each side of the bar. I could not remove them, try as I might. So I just did some dumbell curls, and thought to myself, well, I am kind of on the big boys' turf, so I just had to make due.

I am just getting my feet wet in the gym. I really wanted to find a small, secluded place with fewer people, but there's only one gym in the small town where I live, so I'm in there, rooting with the big boys. I'm hoping my trainer will soon be able to evaluate my strengths and weaknesses and come up with a workout that will add some muscle and tone. The important thing is, no matter what I'm feeling with regard to embarassment or whatever, I'm continuing to go back, hoping I will overcome it. Maybe if I start to get stronger or grow, it will happen.

[TheMM]

Originally Posted by hulkoutlvr

Well, I've had two sessions with the personal trainer now, and I've been in the gym for a week and a half. So far, not much is happening with the iron. Oh, I'm very good at the cardio part of it; losing weight is what I do best. I'm now at 135 and counting. But last night I did legs with the trainer, and that was even more of a body fry than the upper body workout we did last week. Of course it didn't help matters any that a branch warren look alike who seemed to be flexing with every movement he made was working out right next to where we were. Even my trainer has this incredible body, and the whole time we were working together, I'm sure he was thinking 'what am I messing with this little wimp for?". Of course the four sessions came as a part of my package, so I'm sure the gym is paying him well for the time he is 'wasting'. Therefore, I don't feel guilty about taking his time.

I went back and tried to lift tonight after I did my 45 min of cardio. I went to the chest press machine, to find that someone (I can only assume Lou Ferrigno, lol), had left 4 forty five pound weights on each side of the bar. I could not remove them, try as I might. So I just did some dumbell curls, and thought to myself, well, I am kind of on the big boys' turf, so I just had to make due.

I am just getting my feet wet in the gym. I really wanted to find a small, secluded place with fewer people, but there's only one gym in the small town where I live, so I'm in there, rooting with the big boys. I'm hoping my trainer will soon be able to evaluate my strengths and weaknesses and come up with a workout that will add some muscle and tone. The important thing is, no matter what I'm feeling with regard to embarassment or whatever, I'm continuing to go back, hoping I will overcome it. Maybe if I start to get stronger or grow, it will happen.

*whacks you on the head with my cane*

No more negativity Hulkoutlvr. If you keep saying stuff like "little wimp" you might actually start to believe it. And you're not. You simply haven't worked out as long as your trainer and the big guy there. Nothing more, nothing less.

Don't let the other people in the gym intimidate you. Remember what we said before, you're there for you and you alone. Your trainer, and this big guy might indeed be impressive to look at, but comparing yourself to others in the gym is THE most discouraging thing you can do.

I admit, we'd all like that next pound a little faster, or gain it a little easier, but patience, more than anything else, is most key about this. If you don't have patience, you'll never feel like you got anywhere.

[hulkoutlvr]

**whack with the cane accepted*

I didn't say I wasn't going back; it was just frustrating. And the big dude didn't scare me. There's a vast difference between intimidation and fear. I have no fear of he big guys. I guess it's the same reason overweight people don't like to hang around supermodels. It just reminds me of what I don't have-- yet, anyway.

So I call on my inner Job, and exercise every ounce of patience I have as I exercise my muscles. I just pray my trainer doesn't give up before I do. But if he does, I'll get a book on weight training for dummies and do it myself. I need to find a workout buddy though. I never got intimidated back when I had one of those. I got motivted.

[WhoDunIt]

X2 on what MM said, just get that self doubt nonsense out of your head and start moving the weights no matter how light they look compared to what the others there lift. It's ok to start light, everybody does at one point and it's only been a few days for you so far anyway. It sounds like your trainer has been there before, I don't think he'll give up on you easily.

[arpeejay]

Dumbbell chest press. You don't need a machine, just a flat bench. Better range of motion, more control. Combine that with some flyes.

STOP acting like you can read other people's minds. If you're trainer is frustrated with anything, it's probably your defeatism. They LIKE beginners or they wouldn't be doing that kind of work.

xoox

Richard

[DaBigGuy1]

Hey Hulkout,

I couldn't have said better what was already posted before me..great advice from all!

And in my opinion, it all boils down to one important thing.....the MIND. You ever hear of self-fufilling prophecy? Well, if you keep thinking one thing, subconsciously you will be programming yourself to become that way..and you will BE that way. So, a kindly extra whack to the head. Just remember this, as it has been stated before by these great guys here: you are in the gym for YOU and only YOU. The ONLY competition you have is with yourself, and trust me, the mind can be formidable so you must fight it with positive-speak re-enforcement. You ARE going to be good today and better tomorrow...you are on the road to becoming the person that YOU want to be!

As for your trainer, how do you or any of us know what he's thinking? For all we know, while you are saying to yourself "he is probably thinking I am a waste of time", he could be thinking about balancing his checkbook in his head! LOL!! Of course if he is a GOOD personal trainer he is focus on you and your technique. And if he is not doing that then another trainer is in order..NOT because of what he may be thinking but because he is not giving you proper instruction.

And yes, do the homework/research. I'm sure most of us have gone down that same road..Lord knows I have!

And congrats to you, and we are all in your corner. Just keep taking your steps and before you know it, you will be looking back on this from another perspective...make it a good perspective!

Ron III---III

[BIGJOEY]

I am courious as to why you hired a trainer. You stated your 135lbs. how tall are you? 135 is not over weight by any standard charts used today in sports or by your local doctor. It seems to be a issue of self confidence more than anything. One has to remember that everybody in the gym was either skinny or fat. Both of those can be traced to eating habits and some genetics. Self image usually is shaped in the home first when we are very small children and it get reinforced at school. One has to realize that lack of self image come from those 2 sources and it has to be considered when you go into a gym. Its ok to get someone to show you how to do things correctly but your not there for their approval or to boost their self image. Your there for you and your goals. If your trainer has any clue they will understand that. Any person who is paying a trainer and feels they have to please the trainer to get approval is in it for the wrong reasons.

[inflated]

You are doing better than you think, keep plugging away and what now seems like a daunting task will eventually become a pure joy. It takes time, ask your trainer about stretches and home therapies to minimize soreness and stiffness. Also consider going to a good Chiropractor, you are putting your body under a type of stress that it isn't used to. Chiropractic works for many people and can help your body to deal with the new stress. Keep in mind that you are not out to impress anyone and have some fun challenging yourself even if it is in small increments. Keep at it and you will benefit more than you have ever imagined.

[Ender]

A "Good" Training Partner makes lifting a real joy... But finding the right one for you is about as easy as detecting Neutrinos, a Neutron Decay or finding the perfect lover... (on a 1 to 10 scale of difficulty it rates a 43) That's where Personal Trainers came in... a "Rent a Buddy". a good one is part coach, part nutritionist, part psycho-therapist, part cheerleader as a minimum.

Tell yourself that every time you work out and eat right you are making your body get stronger, leaner, more muscular, etc when you wake up, go to the gym, go to bed, and really believe you are the total muscle boy jock stud you want to became...

Ender

[newmus]

i have to agree with everyone else's comments. that said, how exactly do you want to look like? - like your trainer? bigger, almost as big, or the same size you are now but more defined i.e. with 0% body fat? your goal determines how long it will take and if you do what the trainer tells you to do (and he is good) you'll do fine. also, depending on how challenging you goal is the more interested your trainer may be. in 6 months-1 year he may be able to say "look what i helped someone do" i emagine it could be a huge ego boost for him.

[fitnessrx]

Hey Man,
I have been working out and very involved in both the power lifting and bodybuilding
scene for over 30 years, yet I can remember my first time in the gym having some of the
same feelings that you are experiencing now, but I knew down deep after that first workout that lifting was going to be a part of my life for a very long time. Your fears and feelings are very common for anyone who is just starting out, and they are not abnormal, unusual, or bad. You must feel that there are many benefits that you will gain in your life from weight lifting or you would not have joined a gym. My suggestion to you would be to write these benefits down and read them several times every day. This will give you clarity and the motivation to keep training. Our minds,
thoughts, and words have a powerful effect on our lives. If you focus on these benefits that you will gain from working out it will shift your mind away from all of the other negative thoughts and paranoia about others, and give you the motivation that you need to continue to improve.
It might also be comforting for you to know some facts that you seem to have twisted in your mind. Have you ever seen pictures of Paul Dillet at 17 years old? He was a tall and very skinny teen, someone that would have the nickname "bean pole".
Also, look at the pics of Dorian Yates when he first started to work out. He must have weighed about 160lbs with all of his clothes on. If you investigate further, you will see that everyone, even some of the biggest and most massive pros in bodybuilding had to start from the same type of condition that you are in now.
Finally from 30+ years of working out and being friends with many others that are passionate about lifting, no one in the gym is looking at you. Usually my workouts are so intense, that I don't have the energy to look at "you" and criticize you . I am too busy breathing, drinking water, flexing, and psyching myself out for my next set, that
all of my focus is on my own workout and my own progress. Watching "you" would not be a priority, but a distraction, and I am certainly not going to ruin my workout to take the time to focus on the new little guy over in the corner.
Weight lifting is a sport that requires consistency, discipline, knowledge of how the body moves , how the muscles contract, putting a routine together that suits your body, eating correctly, and getting enough rest. It is a lifestyle and if you stick with it, educate yourself, and work hard you can achieve any type of body that you want. Your fears are normal for any beginner, but don't let them discourage you from that body that you want to have so badly. Regards, Fit

[hulkoutlvr]

Thanks guys for the sweet support. And I didn't say I wasn't going back. I fully intend to keep persevering. I just ran up against some fears and insecurities, some of which have nothing to do with, as I like to call them, the big boys, but more to do with me.

BigJoey, to answer your question, currently I am 5'3 1/2 to 5'4 depending on who you ask. I will probably lie and give you the taller of the two because I hate being short.

Newmus, what I want to look like is not so much definable in words as in images. I want to have what I call "a catalog body". I call it that because those kinds of bodies look as though they came from a catalog, in pieces and kits, and were assembled so that each part fits together just the way it should. For a guy, I think that probably means a v taper, broad shoulders and chest, and thick, meaty arms, not to mention manly looking thighs and calves. By saying manly, I mean sturdy. If you all have seen my picture on another thread, you will understand my frustration at being 35 years old and being told I'm built like a boy. It's time for me to look like a man. I can't do anything about the height issue, but I hope to lap a little quality weight on. Yes, I weigh 135, which is pretty thin, but I want every ounce to count for something, that would mean getting below 10 percent bf. I'm currently 11.5.

DaBigGuy, I graciously accept your whack on the head, and promise no more negativity. The big dude at the gym didn't scare me; he just reminded me of what I do not yet posess, and want so much. That is why I have to keep going back. At my height and bone structure, I probably will never look like you, but hopefully one day I will look like the best "me" you've ever seen.

Arpeejay, you are a gem, and I'm proud to know you

And to those of you who mentioned comparing myself to others, you're right. I do tend to do that. It's hard competing in a dating pool where physicality is the first and most important impression you make on people. Another reason why I'm in the gym I guess. . . .

Oh well, it's off to weight loss support in the morning and the gym in the afternoon. I'll try again!

[WhoDunIt]

Glad to here you're not backing down Hulkoutlvr!