Son vs. Father

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[growingbigger]

Nice story! My whole family has been sort of standoff-ish ever since I started growing, especially my older brother since we used to fight when we were younger. He knows now that with me outweighing him by a good 40-50 lbs (and even being just a little taller than him), that I'd take him down in seconds.

I know how you feel. We used to arm wrestle and have strength competitions in my family a lot, but once I got stronger than all of them I wasn't included anymore. At 15 my nephew is seeing that happen already. Last Christmas he got a new weight set. That afternoon he put 100 lbs on the bar and curled a few reps. Saw lots of the guys in the family watching him. A few tried it later on and weren't able to do it. So I guess they don't want to be shown up by a 15 year old.

[growingbigger]

That's pretty good poundage for 15 years old, and as he gets bigger, those responses from the family will only get worse. Family members can be so jealous sometimes, yet they know what they have to do to build up themselves but won't do it. Still in some ways, it feels good to have that "power" over them. I don't know how many times I've flustered my older brother.

[Mdlftr]

I have to comment that while competition in families is very common and unexpected strength, particularly from one of the younger members always blows peoples' minds, it is totally common to have all the competition disappear--- at least where the younger one excels!

In my own family I was always the youngest, the smallest and the poorest. Now, I'm still the youngest, but I'm the tallest, biggest (by a good 4 inches) and definitely competitive in the 'income' department. (We don't compare monthly bank statements, so it's hard to say.)

I found that as soon as I became "competitive" or "superior" or even "on par" with my siblings in a given category, all of a sudden that category "didn't matter" any more.

New job: me
Sib: "oh, I just retired"
Me: new house
Sib: "renting is all the 'IN' thing these days."
Me: flexing
Sib: "What's wrong with you? You look fat!"

Family: Priceless
Their attitude: Annoying!


Mdlftr
...trying to be smug about it, but missing that chance to just "dig" 'em a little!

[Zap]

I like how nobody said anything about how the kid was emasculating his father every change he got. Some kids really need a crash course in "how to be modest". I pretty much hate my dad, but I never put him in a position to where I can go "hey look everyone, I'm like, 5 times stronger than my dad!" to embarrass him. Other than that, nice story I guess.

[bobtimbob]

Originally Posted by Zap

I like how nobody said anything about how the kid was emasculating his father every change he got. Some kids really need a crash course in "how to be modest". I pretty much hate my dad, but I never put him in a position to where I can go "hey look everyone, I'm like, 5 times stronger than my dad!" to embarrass him. Other than that, nice story I guess.

Actually that was my reaction as well. OP, I hope you know what you are doing and that you aren't helping build a barrier between father and son that could carry on long past adolescence.

[MuscleHintz]

Well, as long as the kid doesn't try to put down his father at every moment, it;s okay for him to be proud to show off his strength once in a while. However, he should learn some modesty, especially if this is the way he always acts towards his father. Now days, I see a lot of kids who aim to grow up and ditch thier parents as soon as possible. I know that's probably not the case, but you should remind him that his father took care of him and that he shouldn't try to make other guys in his family feel inferior.

.............

[Zap]

Originally Posted by febjr

Yes, we had a talk with him and he's no longer showing off. At his age he was just psyched to be able to take his father. What he really hoped to accomplish was get his dad to workout with us, but it's not going to happen. He's just not interested.

That's a very weird way to get him to workout with you. How old is the guy and is he crazy out of shape or something? Maybe his son should just sit him down for a health lecture of sorts. That's what I had to do for my chunko-brother to workout with me... Albeit, he slacks off with cardio and just heads straight for the weights. Anyway, if the kid's dad got to experience the feeling folks get when they workout the bigger muscle groups, I'm sure he'd be hooked.

[Mdlftr]

Originally Posted by Zap

That's a very weird way to get him to workout with you. How old is the guy and is he crazy out of shape or something? Maybe his son should just sit him down for a health lecture of sorts. That's what I had to do for my chunko-brother to workout with me... Albeit, he slacks off with cardio and just heads straight for the weights. Anyway, if the kid's dad got to experience the feeling folks get when they workout the bigger muscle groups, I'm sure he'd be hooked.

...I dunno. I like your optimistic approach, but his dad may just not want to do it, no matter what. It could be a generational thing. My father always talked about working out (calestenics) and getting "big muscles" (always said in a loud, embarrassing tone of voice), but once I actually started lifting, it really freaked him out. He'd keep saying, "oh, now, you don't want to hurt yourself. You shouldn't do that. " etc. etc.

It was almost like he was jealous or competitive with me over lifting weights. On the one hand he'd tell me how skinny he was, and how I was just like him, then in the next breath he'd say that I shouldn't lift weights because I'd get hurt!

Major mind f*ck! I finally told him that I was gonna keep liftin' and get bigger than him and flex in his face! THAT shut him up! And my father and I like each other and actually get along!

Go figure...Fathers and sons....[Cue, the song, "Fathers and Sons" by Cat Stevens from "Tea for the Tillerman" album. For all you old studs like me and Richard/Arpejay who'll get the reference!!]

Mdlftr

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[growingbigger]

Sad to hear about the father having no interest and thinking it's all a waste of time. I always wished my father spent more time with me as a kid, too when I was that age. Well, it's good that your nephew is going to continue lifting. I'm sure he'll have great success.

[tallmuscledman]

My dad was a bodybuilder and wrestler while I was growing up and it always kept us close to each other. We would lift 3 times a week and usually end the workout with a good flexing and wrestling session, just for fun. I do the same with my son and it also has kept us very close as his teenage years are going by. Plus he has built some real quality muscle!

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[muscle16a]

Ya know, with everybody walking around with smartphones nowadays, it is an ever present source of sadness to me that we don't get PICTURES to accompany narratives like this.

Don't get me wrong, Febjr, the narrative alone is inspiring. But next time your nephew walks by and lifts his shirt to show off his 6-pack, just whip out that smartphone of yours and give us all a look-see!

[Zap]

Originally Posted by muscle16a

Ya know, with everybody walking around with smartphones nowadays, it is an ever present source of sadness to me that we don't get PICTURES to accompany narratives like this.

Don't get me wrong, Febjr, the narrative alone is inspiring. But next time your nephew walks by and lifts his shirt to show off his 6-pack, just whip out that smartphone of yours and give us all a look-see!

Yes, yes! Put your nephews picture on the Internet (which means it'll never be gone even if you delete the original) so a bunch of guys can stare at his buff bod. /sarcasm

Anyway, if you ARE going to take a picture, make sure he's fully aware of it. I'd be pretty pissed if someone took a picture without my consent and posted it on the Internet.

[nnnrg]

Originally Posted by gaelicbright

Father is teach to their son. so the father is better then the son. son training to the their father. all thick are same to their father. Father help to the their son to any condition but some son are not help to their father.

If this were true then nobody would ever be bigger.

Fortunately it's not true. A son can have better genetic potential for muscle growth than his father by benefit of his mother's side of the family (as I did) or he could be more active, better trained, better nourished with a more scientific approach, or he might simply have a father who knew more about training after a lifelong devotion to bodybuilding and thus the son (or daughter as in the case of one gentlemen I knew from work) simply got a head start by not having to make as many mistakes.

[Zap]

Actually, all men have the potential to grow muscles. The super simple/obvious muscle building blocks include: testosterone and a solid diet.

If a man has a fast metabolism, he can keep fat off with ease, but his body will also want to break down other unneeded tissues - such as extra muscle. So if he keeps over-feeding, then he'll be able to keep his muscle mass and still grow. A lot of the lanky tall guys who have blown up over the years would certainly tell you the same.

If a man is lethargic and/or has a poor diet, muscle will simply not grow. Obviously.

Testosterone levels are heavily dependent on a man's diet and activity. Testosterone is responsible for muscle growth for the most part. Men with insufficient zinc intake will also suffer from low testosterone levels - though it will still be in a healthy range - just not at its highest. If a man just sits around and does nothing, his body doesn't get much activity and it writes off any extra muscle. The older the man, the less testosterone his body will be able to produce. Circle of life, etc. Though a man who is fit will be able to maintain higher testosterone levels for more of his lifetime than a lazy man. Eating foods that produce pytoestrogens(SP?) or not being careful of xenoestrogens(using plastic for things, loads of fabric softner, not washing vegetables, etc) will also cause testosterone levels to drop. This is also why most boys get moobs a lot more compared to boys of the past, and it's also why girls are going through puberty earlier(as well as increased average bust size).

That old "muscle growth depends on genes" crap needs to die. It's true that some men can grow faster than others, and some can grow bigger, but all men can put on more-than-average size with the proper know-how.

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[arpeejay]

Okay, Feb, time to post some pix of YOU, dammit! :-)

xoxo

Richard

[nnnrg]

Originally Posted by Zap

Actually, all men have the potential to grow muscles. The super simple/obvious muscle building blocks include: testosterone and a solid diet.

[Various partial truths edited for brevity - it's not as simple as Zap would have it and nothing he's said is directly wrong but neither is it right. It's difficult to summarize without dropping necessary information.]

That old "muscle growth depends on genes" crap needs to die. It's true that some men can grow faster than others, and some can grow bigger, but all men can put on more-than-average size with the proper know-how.

Muscle growth most certainly depends on genes and if you want proof, look up muscular dystrophy.

Zap is absolutely correct though, that most men have more than adequate genes for building muscle to the point that it starts being a metabolic liability, and then their bodies require feedback telling them that the size is needed. For some few men and women the lack of particular genes means their bodies are naturally muscular without having to do regular workouts (the myostatin knockout genome) and others will grow decent muscle size just from regular athletic activity and good nutrition, but most of us need steady regular properly designed weight training combined with good diet and good rest (sleep that is) for the kind of fitness and muscle size we want.

For whatever reason many of us older or sometimes not that much older men also have chronic lower testosterone levels and need to have that medically treated. Sadly that mostly means testosterone injection since most insurance won't cover anything else, even though that isn't necessarily the best treatment. Note that the lower levels are generally due in part to genetic factors triggered by environmental factors.

If the purpose of his rant was to point out that self-sabotage by way of lame excuses is not going to get muscle growth and that whining isn't an aerobic workout, that's very true, but calling out a fact that people misuse for making those excuses and declaring it a myth that has to die? Not so much more helpful.

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[Minotaur]

Originally Posted by growingbigger

... those responses from the family will only get worse. Family members can be so jealous sometimes, yet they know what they have to do to build up themselves but won't do it. ...

'Tis true. And it's often because they don't know anything about strength or training (i.e. bb'ing, pl'ing, strongman, etc.). Once years ago during the summer I wore a white t-shirt with a light silk summer shirt over it, open. My brother (construction worker and not in bad shape himself) looked at me and said "you've been benching!". I got the most idiotic grin on my face. For the most part, however, either they didn't notice, didn't care, or even made negative comments about training.

I hope by now, because I know this story is old, that the father has been motivated to pick up the weights, and this not backfire on the kid from a jealous father.

[zilcher]

Your nephew is a muscle stud. 17" guns with veins at 16 is impressive. If his dad was an asshole, it would be great to humiliate him at all times with his muscles, but apparently he's not, so mike should have mercy on him.

as a muscle addict, i expect mike to get huge. keep us posted on this bodybuilder.

[Barclay]

Nice story and both are doing good work.

Originally Posted by zilcher

Your nephew is a muscle stud. 17" guns with veins at 16 is impressive. If his dad was an asshole, it would be great to humiliate him at all times with his muscles, but apparently he's not, so mike should have mercy on him.

as a muscle addict, i expect mike to get huge. keep us posted on this bodybuilder.

There will be no more humiliation of his father because his dad is quickly getting as strong if not stronger than my nephew. What we never knew was when he was in college my brother-in-law was a fitness freak. Worked out every day and actually entered a few bodybuilding contests. He left that all behind him though until it became obvious his son had become the alpha male in the house. Muscle memory is a wonderful thing. Once you have lost size it is easier to get it back than if you never had it at all. It's much more fun now that the 3 of us can workout together and watching them grow stronger is fun for me.

Mike is busy with other things now too, so isn't lifting as much as before. His progress has slowed, but he is still getting respect from the guys who formerly picked on him, which was his primary reason to workout in the first place.

[debate1]

Any update on the dad or son? Is the dad even stronger?

[debate1]

Any updates on the son or father?

[andy2011]

Originally Posted by febjr

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Whatever happened to the story in the first post?