Growing Lonely 5

[ldaniel13]

Previous Chapters of Growing Lonely (1) (2) (3) (4)

All growth and no play make Eric a dull boy...

Growing Lonely 5

Part One (Eric)

Marco drove me to his apartment across town in his Jeep, and I wasn?t quite sure what to expect. It was dark and overcast outside, so I didn?t want to have to walk home if things went bad. I guessed that I could find a bus pretty easily. He said that he lived in a loft in the Sodo district of town.

In the car, we talked about Marco?s work as a fitness model. We talked about how the coach of the Varsity baseball team had assured me that I would be on the team this season. Marco wasn?t the least bit surprised. He was proud that he had helped contribute by working with me at the gym.

Once we got to his building, it kind of smelled like urine outside, and I thought that I saw the empty sleeping bag of a homeless person in the corner of the stairwell leading up to the main entrance. There were a bunch of nameplates next to buzzers with the names all scratched out and graffitied-over. If I was about 100 pounds lighter, I would probably be scared for my safety here. I guess that I didn?t quite expect a posh condo or anything, but...

We rode a lift up to the third floor. The lift creaked when we first stepped in. I think that the two of us almost made the weight capacity for the old elevator.

?Looks like we might have to take the stairs next time...? Marco chuckled uncomfortably. He wasn?t convinced that I would want a next time.

Marco turned the key in the deadbolt. I waited nervously for the big reveal with my hands in the pockets of my black track pants. The door swung open to... a spartanly furnished, very clean apartment. I somehow wasn?t expecting this. There were even a few non-bodybuilding related prints on the wall. He also had a couple of framed pictures of himself on the covers of fitness magazines.

Marco was looking down at the floor. He still had thoughts of inadequacy, but they weren?t necessary. He thought that I must hate this place. I was some rich kid from the suburbs. He didn?t think that I could possibly find anything beautiful hidden beneath either the rough exterior of this place or beneath his rough exterior.

?I like it.? I meant it. It almost looked like a real person lived here.

He looked around his apartment, then up at me and smiled. ?I got rid of all the stuff that my girlfriend left as soon as I dumped her. It?s not much, but it?s home.?

When he mentioned his girlfriend, I looked away. ?So you dumped her because of me??

Marco took a seat on a barstool and pulled one out for me, too.

?After I did that to you in the locker room, I didn?t see any point in maintaining the charade anymore. It takes a lot of effort to be an ass all of the time. My girlfriend must have been either crazy or a saint to stay with me for so long. She knew that I had fucked some of the guys at the gym. I think that she thought that she could change me.? He was deeply ashamed of himself. He hated himself for being gay. He had taken it out on his girlfriend, and he had even brutalized some of the smaller guys at the gym--they weren?t all willing. They weren?t even all gay. What am I doing here? Can he be redeemed?

?I understand. I only just recently admitted to myself that I was gay, too.? I paused. ?You won?t hurt anyone else will you??

He looked at me strangely. ?It?s almost as if you know me better than I know myself. I was just thinking about my past. No, I think that my days of hurting people are behind me. I thought that if I was the one that hurt people, then they wouldn?t have the opportunity to hurt me.?

?Yeah, I am rather intuitive about people,? I said noncommittally. It was hard not to be honest with him since he was opening up to me so much lately. I was genuinely starting to fall for him.

?One of your many gifts, right?? He leaned forward and rubbed my huge quads through my track pants.

?Yeah, this summer brought about many changes.? I thought about Ricky. ?Not all of them were good.?

Marco removed his hand, afraid that I was talking about him. Such a simple thing to cause him to feel so panicked. I reached out and grabbed his hand and held it gently in both of mine. He calmed down slightly. ?Don?t worry, you were a good part, and you?re getting even better.? I smiled genuinely. ?A friend of mine has just been ignoring me lately. I probably deserve it, but it still hurts.?

?Ricky...? Marco said tonelessly. I couldn?t quite hear what he was thinking. It seemed like people could occasionally block their thoughts from me. If they came from a place without passion, from a cold place or from a place of self-denial, then I couldn?t quite hear them clearly... yet. I was beginning to hear them as if I was listening to a TV in the room next door with my ear held to the wall, just bits and pieces; however, the volume was slowly being turned up. I think that my constant focus on trying to read Ricky must be improving my sensitivity, either that or my mind is just developing along with my body. Over the past month, Marco had been like a partial person. His thoughts about me growing bigger were strong, but he had suppressed his personal thoughts till I could barely even register them. At least I recognized that they were there now, though.

That must mean that Ricky is hiding... everything. How tiring and painful that must be.

I shivered. ?Yes, Ricky. He... loved me, but I couldn?t admit to myself that I was gay. I think that he hates me for it. I think that I loved him all along. In fact, I know it, but I couldn?t admit it to myself until it was too late.? I rubbed Marco?s hand.

His thoughts slowly softened as I massaged his palm. ?I know how you feel. When I was little, I had a friend, Steven, in one of the orphanages that I stayed at. We did everything together. I think that I loved him, too. One day on the playground, he kissed me on the cheek.? He paused and rubbed his cheek as if he could still feel it. He had never spoken of this to anyone. ?One of the nuns saw it and beat him bloody. He would never even look at me again. After awhile, I got so angry at him that I started calling him names like ?fag? and stuff. I gave him a really hard time because he wouldn?t even look at me anymore. I always felt so lonely, and I only wanted him to look at me. He ended up running away. I don?t even know if he is still alive.?

The room was silent, Marco?s thoughts were nearly silent, too. Then the words came pouring out

?I?m a bad person. You must hate me. I?ve hurt people, too many people. When you first talked about Ricky that night, I wanted to hurt him so bad. When I wanted you more than anything, when I new that you were the only one that could help me, he could have had you without forcing himself on you. You two could have had something beautiful, not the ugly thing that I did to you. Everything in me is rotten.?

There was that small, sobbing boy inside. He was so lonely amidst the refuse that Marco had collected around his soul. He was too tired to hide anymore.

I stood up, towering over Marco. He slumped down in the chair, expecting a beating for his revelation. I reached under his arms, hauling him to his feet, which isn?t easy to do with nearly 300 pounds of resisting weight. He grunted in shock at how easily I pried him off his seat.

?I am here choosing to be with you right now. If everything about you was rotten, would I choose to be with you?? I was staring deeply into his eyes. he had to make this choice. He had to decide that there was something redeemable about himself.

Marco, hands shaking, rested them on my hips. He stood up on his toes to kiss me. I was about 4 inches taller than him. I did not resist. In fact, I met him half-way. At that moment, I realized that there was enough about Marco to love, even if he was terribly flawed, it only made me more eager to help him, to make him realize that he was more than just another roided out bodybuilder. Things in his past had badly damaged him, but I didn?t think that he was beyond repair.

I led him to the back of the loft where his bed was. At first he seemed very surprised. As we were walking, I started tugging at shirt. He quickly got into the spirit. In between kissing frantically, we somehow got our clothes off, with the exception of my boxers. They were scattered in a trail leading to the bed. At the foot of the bed, I gave him a ?small? push that sent him sprawling onto the bed. He lay there looking up at me, propping himself up on his elbows. He was young and toned and huge at about 295. Since he hadn?t done any fitness modeling over the past few months, he had let some dark chest hair grow in as well as a trail leading down over his abs to a very respectable thick 9? dick, which was mostly hard now. He followed my gaze down to his dick. He was a little more confident now. He winked at me. ?Do you like what you see? This body has been on three magazine covers. I haven?t worked in awhile, though. I guess that I have developed kind of a bad reputation with the photographers. A gaffer at the my last shoot asked if I was gay. I suppose he was just interested, and I punched him. People just don?t trust me.? At least he felt some regret over losing his temper.

?I trust you... mostly. Do you trust me?? I slowly removed my boxers exposing one of my most shocking aspects.

His eyes widened. ?Has that ?thing? gotten even bigger?? His voice was incredulous.

I suddenly felt rather overexposed. ?I suppose it is kind of freakish.?

He quickly reiterated. ?Don?t get me wrong, it?s fucking beautiful. Freakishly huge but beautiful nonetheless. Um, exactly how big is it now?? He sounded a little nervous.

?I don?t know. How big do you think it is??

?Come here.? He beckoned me forward. I leaned down over him, my arms resting on either side of him in pushup position. My longish shaggy blond hair was hanging over my face, and my massive triceps and pecs were taut as I effortlessly held the position. His legs were spread out, hanging over the bed, with mine nestled between them. He reached down, slowly caressing my dick, his hands moving from my golden pubes up to the sensitive head. It wasn?t taking much to get me hard. As my dick hardened, he started to rub our dicks together massaging them with both hands. Since he had a little bit of a head start, he used some of his precum as lube. I squirmed. ?Wow, it feels way better when someone else is doing it.?

Marco smiled and reached for the nightstand with one hand, continuing to stroke me. He grabbed a cloth tape measure and started to measure me.

I raised one eyebrow. ?By the bed? Narcissistic much.?

?Don?t judge.? He said guiltily. ?It gets lonely by myself. My girlfriend used to measure me. It makes me feel... kinda sexy.?

I managed to hold in the laughter. It was actually kind of cute.

He returned to measuring me. Hard, my dick eclipsed his. He seemed to be double and triple checking the measurement. ?14?, your dick grew two inches in a month. That is barely human,? he said in complete awe. ?How did you get this big. I?ve seen your dad at the gym. There is no way that that little guy is packing something like this.?

I rolled to my side out of pushup position. The bed creaked loudly as I dropped my full weight on it. ?For one thing, gross. No more talking about my dad. For another, please just accept me the way that I am and don?t ask too many questions. I?ll say that it has to do with my genes and leave it at that. I really do like getting big, maybe too much, and that is not something that I have control over, so please try to accept me.?

He looked at me like I had just dropped an anvil on his head or something. Then he burst out laughing. ?You are worried about me accepting YOU. After all that I have done, I hardly considered that that would be an issue. You are perfect, regardless of the size of your freakish dick.?

He wouldn?t stop laughing, so I grabbed him, and we started wrestling. We didn?t get very far when, suddenly, the wood frame on the futon cracked and the bed dropped to the floor. Marco was laughing so hard that he was crying. In his adult life, he had never been this happy. He had never laughed this hard or let himself be so vulnerable. We were both naked with me perched atop him, pinning him to the mattress.

At my sudden realization, I became perfectly still. He slowly stopped laughing, looking up into my sad ice-blue eyes. Mistaking the cause of my silence, he was suddenly very frightened again. He couldn?t quite move with me atop him. ?Don?t leave me. I accept you. Please stay. I?ll be good. I didn?t mean it.? He struggled to move his head forward far enough to brush his lips against the wrist of my hand pressing on his shoulder. He was desperate. This time, not just for my body, he was desperate for me. The one person that had made him happy in his shallow adult life.

I can?t believe that I have that effect on someone. I?m not sure that it?s right. It?s too much power.

I released my pin and sat back, aghast. He leaned forward and grabbed at me frantically, breathing heavily. When I showed no inclination towards leaving the bed, he calmed down. ?I?m pathetic. Why are you even here? What could you possibly see in me?? His voice was cracking with emotion and muffled as he was talking with his face pressed up against my massive pecs. I didn?t know how he could even function as well as he has been under the tremendous weight of his self-hatred that he has accumulated over the course of his life.

?I think that you are beautiful. Beneath everything, you are not the monster that you have portrayed yourself to be.? I ran my hand through his spiky black hair, holding his head against my chest comfortingly. ?I won?t leave you. It?s okay. Everything will me okay.?

His eyes were filled with moisture. ?I want to be your first. I want to do it right this time.? He grabbed a condom from a box that said Magnum on it in big letters. ?We?ll see if it holds together. We?ll see if I hold together.? He chuckled, some of the earlier light and warmth returning to his eyes. ?I have never been on the receiving end, so this will be a first for both of us.?

?If anyone can take me, it?s you, big guy.? I lightly slapped the side of his muscular ass.

?Okay, let me go to the bathroom and freshen up.?

He was gone for awhile, leaving me some time to think. He was also giving me some time to leave him if that was my intention.

I shook my head. Maybe after tonight he will have some more self-confidence.

I was still hard and getting harder. I unrolled the condom onto my dick. It barely even fit right. I could barely believe that the huge appendage was mine. Marco was right; it didn?t look human. ?Just call me ?donkey boy,?? I whispered to myself.

Marco, who had been padding quietly up to the bed while I was thinking, heard and chuckled. ?Okay, ?donkey boy,? let?s get it on. I hope that you haven?t started without me.? Jokingly, he approached me like a wrestler, acting like he was trying to pin me. In my excitement, I underestimated my strength and spun him around like a rag doll.

?Holy shit! Be careful! I?m not used used to being around people that can handle me like that.? His voice was a little high and tense. I pulled him down so that he was laying on his side. He passed back some lube from the nightstand. I kissed him on the neck tenderly and his body relaxed. I squeezed some of the lube out onto my large hands. I slowly rubbed it into his ass with my left hand while massaging his dick with my right. I inserted one finger into his ass at a time, trying to open him up a bit more. Marco kept making grunting noises. So far so good. He was definitely enjoying himself.

?Is there anything else that I should be doing back here?,? I asked nervously.

?The fuck do I know. I never really learned how to do it right. I was always so horny and desperate that I just started thrusting as soon as I had their ass in front of me. I am thinking that I really owe some people an apology.? He looked over his shoulder at me nervously. ?I?m probably as ready as I?ll ever be.?

I put some more lube on my dick and his ass, then I carefully eased myself forward. As I slowly pushed the head of my dick into his ass, he put one hand on my side and he hunched over, clutching at his abdomen. ?Oh my God!?

?It?s okay, the head is almost in.? He was panting deeply as the tail end of the head of my slid past his sphincter with a slight pop. ?Wow, this is really tight.? I breathed out in pleasure.

?You think?? He managed to say sarcastically as he was grimacing back at me.

I waited a little while for him to adjust before I slid forward a couple more inches. At some point during those few addition inches, he gasped. ?Wow, that?s the spot. Damn, it feels really good right there.? The feeling was so strong for him that I could feel his pleasure in addition to my own. It must be like fucking and being fucked at the same time. Incredible. I bucked forward a couple more inches in my excitement.

?Whoa... slowly.? The earlier pleasure turned into a rather uncomfortable full, painful feeling. He put his hand on my hip a little bit more firmly.

?I?ll wait until you?re ready.? I could judge by how much pain pleasure he was feeling.

?You better. My ass feels rather defenseless right now.?

After a minute or so, he released relaxed a bit. I kissed his back, easing backwards and thrusting forward. We both practically wailed in pleasure. I thrust back and forth, not going much farther than I was before. It was so tight. Eventually, I got in to about 10 inches. He was panting heavily. I turned him onto his stomach and spread his legs so that I could get more room to thrust. After a couple of gentle thrusts, I picked up the pace. I knew the point at which he became too uncomfortable because I could feel if I was causing him pain. It was like I was causing myself pain, too. He was so eager to please me that by this point that he probably wouldn?t tell me if I was hurting him. I just kept at it trying to do whatever gave him the most pleasure.

His thoughts were screaming his love for me.

Startled, I gripped his shoulders, which were beaded with sweat, putting my full weight on him. ?I love you, too.?

He was face buried in the pillows with a grimace of pleasure as well as pain. He closed his eyes and a few tears rolled down his face. ?God, God, God, God. I feel so full. You are so much. In every way. I... I... I?m coming.?

I bent down and wrapped my huge arms around the front of his muscular chest, holding him tightly as I bucked forward two more inches and came deep inside him. He screamed bloody murder as he came harder than he had ever cum before. Tightly embracing my helpless lover, I snuggled against his back, breathing in the powerful odor of his manly sweat as both of our powerful orgasms rolled through me. I had pulled out till just over his prostate and was slowly making tiny thrusts back and forth until his orgasm faded. By that point, he was practically sobbing with pleasure. This big, hard man was completely limp in my arms. I kissed him and rested my head against his broad upper back. I was rather tired. It had been a long, eventful day.

?You better not be killing anyone up there, you big brute.? An old man?s voice called through the floor from downstairs.

"My neighbor..." Marco whispered.

?No, we?re just wrestling," I called down. Marco managed to turn his head and look at me from under my weight. He waggled his eyebrows at me.

And we did wrestle. Like little kids this time.

He was actually able to put away his emotional baggage for the rest of the night.

Progress.


Part Two (Ricky): From a Distance

The next morning, Ricky was out running on the bike trail down by Lake Union. The early morning light was shining off of the rippling water. It looked like the leaves were just starting to turn, but the weather was still nice. Almost abnormally so, for Seattle. He would nod at other joggers as they passed, feeling more sociable than at any other time of the day. It was almost like a dream.

Running was the only time where anything made any sense. He was able to tune out the outside world and focus on the only thing that mattered at the time. One foot in front of the other, kind of like how he was currently living his life.

Ricky was getting straight A?s. His cross country coach said that he might make it to nationals the way that he was running this year. He was even starting to talk to his friends again. Most of them, anyway. Ricky?s mom didn?t have to get up in the middle of the night to comfort her crying son anymore. Ricky?s family said that they had never been more proud of him.

Ricky was not okay. He was putting things in order. He was trying to make everyone happy, but he was not happy, except when he was running. It felt like he was being stifled, like he couldn?t live his own life, the life that he was meant to live.

...And then there was Eric. Why couldn?t he just be an ass? Why couldn?t he be less beautiful? Every time Eric tried to talk to Ricky, it cut a little deeper into the mental wounds that would not close--every time Eric ambushed him in the hall, tried to sit with him in the cafeteria, tried to walk with him on the way home. Tears streamed down Ricky?s face, mingling with his sweat, but he continued to smile as he passed runners.

Ricky always coldly avoided Eric despite his frequent attempts to rekindle their friendship. At first, Ricky thought that Eric was just toying with him, trying to hurt him more, but maybe that wasn?t right. Eric had even tried to tell Ricky that he had called over the summer and tried to talk to him. That was a lot different from Ricky?s dad?s version of events, but Ricky believed Eric because he wanted to. It even gave him a bittersweet type of happiness. Someone could want to be friends with him even though he was a 'disgusting gay', even though he hated himself. Jenny, who had adamantly remained friends with Ricky despite his aloofness at the beginning of the year, kept trying to get him to talk to Eric. Ricky told her to tell Eric that he wasn?t interested in talking, but she was persistent.

Eric was certainly making an effort, and Ricky realized that, but he couldn?t seem to meet Eric halfway, apparently not even 90-10. Eric apparently wanted to be his friend again, but wasn?t it too late. Ricky just couldn?t reach out to Eric. Eric?s presence was simply too strong. His huge musculature and masculine beauty were too much for Ricky. Ricky didn?t think that he could just be friends with Eric anymore. He would wither and die in his presence, never able to love anyone else.

How was that any different from how things are now?

Ricky had tried to kill himself over the summer, Long, jagged scars now criss-crossed his forearms, but people seemed content to brush it under the table. Chalk it up to teen angst. His parents sent him to a psychiatrist for a few months and put him on meds, so he must be alright now... Right?

If only his sister hadn?t come home early from shopping. If only he had cut a little deeper or somewhere else. It had just been a whim. One minute he had been looking in the mirror, the next he had punched the mirror, the next he had picked up a shard from the sink and clutched it with his bloody fist, the next, cut, cut, cut, bleed, bleed, bleed, bleed, silence... but his sister had saved him. Everyone thought that he was ?saved??

Sure he was skinny as a rail, he rarely ate despite intense training, and he slept less than a usual teenager, but acknowledging those problems would require his family to look beneath the surface, to admit that something was still very wrong with Ricky, which they were not ready to do. Where was the comedian? Ricky had always been the first to make people laugh, but not anymore. That well was dry. Ricky?s family still thought that everything would be alright if they just let him work it out himself, but that wasn?t what he needed.

Ricky, from a distance, appeared to be doing well; however, he still felt like he was one bad day away from ending it all. He didn?t think that anyone would accept him for being gay, for having tried to kill himself. He was alone and socially isolated among loving family and friends. He didn?t know that if he just talked about it, he would find more supportive people than he thought. He was young, thinking that he had to bear the weight of the world himself. He didn?t think that he could run down that road alone much longer.

The sun glinted off Ricky?s smooth bronze skin and an older runner passing Ricky thought, ?Wow, what I wouldn?t give to be young, beautiful, and carefree.?

[Ender]

or The "grass is greener" paradox...

Sometimes you come across a statement that doesn't seem to be very profound, but rings with enormous truth and wisdom, if you are ready to hear it. The final sentence here is one of those rare passages at least for me and if all of the characters in this chapter would realize what it is saying and believe it they would all be a lot happier...

The sun glinted off Ricky’s smooth bronze skin and an older runner passing Ricky thought, ‘Wow, what I would’t give to be young, beautiful, and carefree.’

Everyone has problems. No one has a perfect life. Even if it appears to you their lives are perfect and less painful than than your life... Because you know about all your problems, doubts, fears, pains, weaknesses... etc but you have no clue of what inner torment that guy that seems to not have a care in the world when you pass on the street is feeling... to him you're the one that is completely carefree and have every thing in your world under control and are the master of all you survey...

That's something I do way too much and always beat myself up for not being as perfect as I think the other seems to be...

Ender

I wonder if Ricky would get to listen in on other people thoughts the way Eric can... and getting bigger might help his confidence. It seems unlikely it could possibly make him feel more worthless. But how to pass him a dose??? and get him to take it???

[sexiscriptor]

I'm baffled there haven't been more comments by now. I mean, sure, this chapter's been up only a few hours, but STILL! Apparently depth doesn't beget discourse as much as I'd like it to XD I guess a lot people here just want to see more dick-boning stuff than mind-probing, which is a real pity....this story truly excels not only as a muscle growth tale but as a story in its own right.

Again, I'm deeply impressed by the depth & complexity & realness of the characters in this story & their shifting roles, feelings, positions, etc, as it progresses. And you can't always count on finding that even in "real", NON-mg media, nevermind here on the forums.... Congrats & thanks for writing another fascinating, sexy chapter of this great lil story, man, and I certainly hope to see more--for this story and from you in general
~Chris

[Ender]

Sadly I think part of the problem is that people and kids in particular are not required to think or reason any more... for the most part they just sit back and wait to be simulated... by what every comes along when you ask them to participate just a little by thinking a about a story just a little most will clasp their heads and shriek "This is too hard it makes me head hurt" and switch to another channel...

One thing I forgot to mention in my first post is that has me a bit confused. I'm not sure if I misread Marco in regard to wanting to kill Ricky from a chapter or so back when Marco and Eric first meet and made out in the gym locker room... I was quite sure Marco had said something to Eric of thought it to himself that he (Marco) had been in contact with Ricky either before or very shortly after Richy and Eric had their falling out, over Ricky picture of Eric. I had expected Eric would "pump" Marco for the details about Ricky and Marcos relationship. But that didn't happen in this chapter and Eric doesn't seem to remember Marco's statement or he now doesn't care...

Also It appears the Ricky is a real basket case now the hospital and his family have him so scared that he will get locked up again he tells them what ever he thinks they want to hear... including that he's not gay and was just confused... Eric and Richy broke up because Ricky believe he was gay and Eric wasn't sure whether he was or not. Now Eric believes he is gay but Ricky is denying he is gay publicly although he knows he is and Ricky believes Eric to be straight... And Eric is totally confuse by Ricky mostly because he doesn't know Ricky tried to kill himself... Ricky is going to continue in self destruct mode until he and Eric sit down and tell each other what is going on with them...

I think that giving Ricky the grow juice might help him (sort of like insulin shock therapy from the 40's to 6O's) get a new prospective on life and the world...

Ender

[tagsnola]

... lugubrious! I just hope after all this angst, we get to seem some sunshine in the end. But maybe not. That isn't always how life works out is it? It is not for nothing that life is sometimes called "this veil of tears."

[tagsnola]

Originally Posted by sexiscriptor

I'm baffled there haven't been more comments by now. I mean, sure, this chapter's been up only a few hours, but STILL! Apparently depth doesn't beget discourse as much as I'd like it to XD I guess a lot people here just want to see more dick-boning stuff than mind-probing, which is a real pity....this story truly excels not only as a muscle growth tale but as a story in its own right.

Again, I'm deeply impressed by the depth & complexity & realness of the characters in this story & their shifting roles, feelings, positions, etc, as it progresses. And you can't always count on finding that even in "real", NON-mg media, nevermind here on the forums.... Congrats & thanks for writing another fascinating, sexy chapter of this great lil story, man, and I certainly hope to see more--for this story and from you in general
~Chris

SS: I suspect more readers are enjoying than are commenting. As for the sex, this story needs no luridly descriptive sex scenes at all. In fact, if the writer just marked off the sex scenes before and after with something like a **** and a reader skipped over those parts the story would still be just as enjoyable. Especially enjoyable to me has been Eric's care and concern for others. As a character, he is portrayed as phenomenally gifted but, rather than lording it over other less gifted people, he seems determined to render his giftings service of other people around him. Even with the pain and angst in this story, it is so uplifting to read about a characters like Eric. This story inspires ME to strive to be a better person. And that, imho, is the highest calling of any writer.

[ldaniel13]

As an aside, I just wanted to explain my personal preferences when writing about muscle growth since I don't think that it is the most common view (if that can be said about a muscle growth fixation). Simply put, I prefer that people grow stronger emotionally as they grow physically. From personal experience, I have known many physically strong people that I can't help but consider weak. I enjoy expounding upon the difference between a truly strong person and a person that is hiding behind physical strength for any reason. Even I have hid behind physical strength on occasion.

I think that persevering at lifting, showing dedication, and willing yourself to improve can instill some amount of mental fortitude. However, sometimes people that take shortcuts to make quick gains are unable to cope with their newfound physical strength--they become imbalanced. I would like to think that if the reigns of power suddenly landed in some special person's hands, then they would rise to the occasion and become an overall better person. Maybe I am just being idealistic; I certainly haven't seen it in reality that often, but when I do, I find it quite sexy.

Don't get me wrong, I still really like stories about out of control muscle monsters, but they also make me sad. Often the people that are most desperate to find strength lose any semblance of true strength in the process. I think that some people view physical power as a means of avoiding the responsibilities inherent in being human, and we all like to be absolved of our responsibilities every once in awhile. (Perhaps, due to an extensive psychology background, I do too much analyzing...)

[redroger11]

Sometimes the author has said so much that rings true that readers find it hard to comment. Other than to try to heap well deserved praise on the head of the Author.
ldaniel13, you have an excellent story here. You are showing the human heart and the ways that one wonderful person can use the hope and love he has and help pull others out of the pain they fell into or the pain they put themselves into in their grief. Sometimes all it takes to turn it around is taking the time to hold someone, and let all the care and love you feel for them come through in that embrace. You have your character Eric displaying that ability. It doesn't need the ability to read minds to work.
And I think you show that very well in the very human way Eric tires to reach out.

Brilliant. Stellar.

Please Keep Writing. The world is starved for these kinds of stories.

Hugs;
redroger11

[redroger11]

A quick response to ldaniel13. I don't think you do too much analyzing. Your story is well rounded. Keep doing what yer doing. Sounds great to me and I bet to lot of other people. And about the strength, well that rings true in my head. if you get bigger you should be able to handle more. be more forgiving. Be gentler. There is a homily about strength and gentleness and for the life of me I can't remember it. But you are showing it very well indeed. Thanks for one hell of a read and a"Growing" Classic, story wise.

KW.
Hugs;
redroger11

[dimarvalc]

Originally Posted by redroger11

Sometimes the author has said so much that rings true that readers find it hard to comment.

Yes, redroger11. I agree with you. I'm used to explore what I feel deep inside me from many years of writing a diary. For me, it's nothing that feels strange. I can see how different and difficult it must be for many people. Especially when their feelings have been stirred.

Originally Posted by ldaniel13

Perhaps, due to an extensive psychology background, I do too much analyzing...

I've always loved psychology and sociology. If your "extensive psychology background" was a factor in the writing of this story, Please, never stop analyzing too much

Not only is your story really good, but your comments are filled with a lot of insight and very interesting thoughts. Keep it up. I LOVE behind-the-scenes information about a story. And this was really great.

WOW. Maybe I should write a horror muscle growth story sometime. I LOVE my horror (damn it... now I'm thinking about werewolves... hmmmmmm... where did I put my copy of The Howling?)

dimarvalc

[MAZIVKAROLY]

You are a talented writer and O what insights you are including from your psychology background. Do continue with your sensitivity to the loneliness factor that plagues all truly candid human beings, including my very own self.

Many thanks for this ongoing tale and your willingness to share your words here with all of us on the evol forum.

I did experience many similar feelings/emotions as I survived my own adolescence, some five decades earlier. Thanks for re-MIND-ing and recalling this period of life with such vivid clarity.

[DracoOfZeradait]

Originally Posted by ldaniel13

(Perhaps, due to an extensive psychology background, I do too much analyzing...)

On the contrary, I firmly believe your ability to analyze things as deeply as you do makes this story even better. This story is all about character development for all parties involved, and they all have a very real feel to them because I'm sure we've all known a Ricky or Marco, and some of us have even been the Eric to help bring them out of their troubles. This is more than just a piece of muscle-growth fiction, it's a look into the very soul of what we talk about here. This is a work of art in the making. You have a unique gift that is rarely seen on any story archive.

It has been a genuine honor to follow Eric, Marco, and Ricky in their travels. But you see, you have to keep going with this because now that we've all been immersed in this world, I doubt that many of us are going to be satiated until we know how the story ends.

FANTASTIC WORK. I can't gush enough about it. Keep it up!

[philat99]

I'm really enjoying your character development. Keep up the great writing!
Mike

[chocomus]

hum.... I like a lot the way Eric is doing things, not being an arrogant jerk or a violent ock. But.... Just for once I think he should cock-slap Ricky till he understands the situation. it's so sad... Don't give up Ricky, and you too Eric!!!!

Thanks for the story.

[Ender]

Originally Posted by chocomus

hum.... I like a lot the way Eric is doing things, not being an arrogant jerk or a violent ock. But.... Just for once I think he should cock-slap Ricky till he understands the situation. it's so sad... Don't give up Ricky, and you too Eric!!!!
Thanks for the story.

Eric may be the incredible Hulk now but he's still the sensitive kid that took a ton of abuse from his peers inside... he wants to make things better for both Marco and Ricky. But Ricky won't let Eric near him because he believe Eric will hurt him more because in a moment of uncertainty Eric backed away from him when Ricky let the nature of his feelings for Eric slip out. What so dumb is Eric never had a issue with Rick being gay but Eric wasn't sure how he felt about Eric being gay... Ricky misread Eric's confusion as a rejection gayness Now Eric is okay that he is/maybe gay be Ricky to prevent conflicts with his own family, doctors and Eric Ricky is now trying to convince everyone including himself that he is not gay... Please someone throw the two of them in a room and not let them out until they both talk it all out so they can "kiss and makeup"

Since Ricky won't let Eric try to repair Ricky and their relationship Eric has adopted Marco as a rebuild project to keep him busy done until Ricky is willing to let Eric back into his life. I can understand Marco's attraction to Eric Eric is nice kind gentle guy and he has been nice to Marco and Eric is huge and Marco is in awe of that... What I don't really understand what Eric gets from hanging around with Marco... Yes Marco is a training partner, a worshiper, Room mate, and fuck buddy; but I don't see Eric as need those things as much as Marco does... A guess he is just too nice a guy.

Ender

[philat99]

Thanks for yet another great episode with fantastic character development. Keep up the great writing and I'm looking forward to the next chapters.
Mike

[withrealpurple]

Thank you for a truly enjoyable read thus far.

I've always had this peculiar and probably simplistic view that you could love anyone, if only you knew their mind. It's wonderful to see an echo of that here, particularly so beautifully rendered.

That said, I'm intrigued to see where you'll be taking things! Keep up the good work, if you've time. And related to same, consider quitting your day job!

I'd also like to echo redroger11's reply to an earlier comment - a lack of comments does not mean a lack of appreciation. As a long term lurker, I can attest.