Want Me - 7

[Rowan]

Ch.1
Ch.2
Ch.3
Ch.4
Ch.5
Ch.6

7

I went livid when I saw Walker standing in the middle of the room with my notebook. ?Hey!? I stormed up to him, snatched it out of his hands. ?What are you, snooping in my stuff now??

He grinned down at me.

?This is serious, Walker!?

?I know,? he said, still smiling. He crossed his arms over his chest, drawing attention to biceps almost twice as big as mine. ?It?s just that after four days of silent treatment, having you yell at me again actually feels good.?

I scowled at him. ?You don?t have any fucking respect for me, do you??

He chuckled.

?What??

Walker shook his head, his face warm. ?In our old life?the original one?if you?d just raise your voice at me I?d be terrified. But in this life you?re cute when you?re angry.? His gaze slid over my body. ?It?s turning me on.?

Unwillingly, my gaze dropped to the bulge in his jeans. It was huge, and swelling by the second. I snapped my head to the side, knowing that I was less in that department and not wanting to imagine exactly what he kind of meat he might be packing now.

?You?re cute when you blush, too,? said Walker.

Swearing viciously, I spun around, shoved my notebook under my pillow. ?Just stay out of my stuff!?

Some of the humor left his voice, replaced by curiosity. ?Joel? I didn?t know you wrote poetry.?

?I don?t,? I snapped, keeping my back to him.

?But??

?It?s just some stupid assignment that Ackerly sprung on us.? I tugged on the pillow, made sure the notebook was completely covered. ?It wasn?t even on the syllabus.?

?The one written on the first page was... amazing.?

?Shut up.?

But, as usual, Walker kept right on talking.

?I?m serious. The way you described that drop of rain from start to finish?beginning with the exhilaration of falling through the air, the switch to fear, and finally the moment where it shatters against the concrete.? I heard him move a step closer. ?Wow.?

?You shouldn?t have read it.? My skin went hot again. ?I don?t even know what the hell I?m doing. Stumbling around, trying to get something on paper so Ackerly doesn?t fail me.? My voice fell to a whisper. ?You shouldn?t have read it.?

He paused, and when he spoke again he sounded contrite for the first time since I started yelling. ?I wasn?t snooping. It was laying in the middle of the floor, and all those composition notebooks look the same. There wasn?t anything written on the cover, so I had to open it to figure out whether it was mine. From the first word I was hooked, couldn?t stop reading.?

I frowned, staring down at my bed as I wondered if it could have fallen out of my bag on my way out today.

Walker exhaled heavily and left the room.

Retrieving my notebook, I opened it up and tried to understand what he liked about my poem. I didn?t see it, decided he had to be lying to me again, trying to get close to me like he was always trying to get close to me.

Still, I picked up a pen, went to my desk, and tried to write a better one.

That night, I sat up in bed, watching Walker sleep. The window was next to my bed, so the moonlight spilled over me and right onto his body. It illuminated his skin, highlighting every hill and valley with a silvery glow.

He didn?t do the pajama thing anymore. Only boxer shorts for Walker Cain now. His blanket was slung over his legs and hips, but I could see his back clearly. The rise of his shoulder blades; the spread of his wings; the long, deep dip of his spine.

Had my back looked that good? I thought so. It was getting hard to remember.

My stomach twisted. I wanted to keep staring. I wanted to look away. I knew doing either would bring equal amounts of pain.

Scrubbing my face with my hand, I eased out of bed, put on my clothes. I needed fresh air. It seemed like the bigger Walker got, the stronger his scent became. Hyacinth filled the room, filled my senses. I couldn?t get a second?s peace.

So I slipped away, and tried to find one outside.

*****

The late afternoon sun cut through the air as I crumpled up the paper in my hands, tossed it over my shoulder and kept walking.

?Hey! Litterbug!?

I turned, surprised to see April scoop up my ball of paper and run toward me. ?Hi.?

?Don?t ?hi? me, mister.? She shook the paper at me. ?You know I have panic attacks about the state of our environment, and then you just toss a perfectly recyclable piece of it onto the campus lawn.?

Her obvious familiarity made me break into a smile. ?We?re friends.?

?We are, huh?? April crossed her arms over her breasts, stuck her nose into the air. ?Wouldn?t know it with the way you?ve been treating me this week.?

My eyebrows rose. Definitely had to fix this. I needed all the friends I could get. ?What did I do??

?You didn?t return any of my calls! And I left you three messages!? Her nose lowered as she cast a hurt, sidelong glance at me. ?How come you?re not answering your cell? You mad at me??

?Oh,? I said softly. Afraid that Walker might call me again, I?d turned the ringer off to my phone and stuffed it into the bottom of my footlocker. It hadn?t occurred to me that other people might try to call. ?Sorry. Lost it.?

Her face scrunched a little. ?Lost it?? She glanced away, her nose in the air again. ?Sounds like a very ?guy? excuse. Not sure I believe you.?

Grinning, I took her hand, drew her close. I had her pegged at about five foot five, so I was still a few inches taller than her, still felt comfortable about trying a little charm. ?I had no idea you were trying to call me. Honest.?

She rolled her eyes. ?Then why didn?t you call me??

I gave her an explanation that was true enough. ?Had a really tough week.? I lowered my head. ?Got booted from the team.?

Her face instantly softened. ?Oh, I?m sorry to hear that. I know how hard you were trying.?

Forcing a smile, I tried to graciously accept her sympathy. Funny how no one ever seemed surprised when they found out about it. ?Thanks.?

April shook the ball of paper at me. ?But that?s still no excuse for littering.? She unwrapped it. ?What is this, anyhow??

Instinctively, I reached for it. ?It?s nothing.?

?Whoa ho! An ?A!? Nice work!? Her brow furrowed when she took a closer look. ?Wait, is this an Ackerly paper??

?Yeah. So??

Her eyes rounded as glanced up at me. ?Joel, why would you throw this away??

I shrugged. ?She won?t leave me alone. Keeps trying to tell me I have talent.?

She shook her head in disbelief. ?And you don?t believe her??

Suddenly uncomfortable, I let go of her hand. ?The only thing I ever had any talent for was...? I swallowed, shook the thought away. ?I just write down what I think, what I?m feeling. There?s nothing special about that.?

?Joel...? She smoothed the wrinkles out of the paper. ?Professor Ackerly doesn?t play around. It?s almost impossible to get an ?A? on one of her assignments.?

I didn?t know April that well, but I was beginning to think she was one of those girls who liked to blow things out of proportion. ?Can?t be that hard. That?s my fourth one.?

?Fourth?? She made a sound that was part awe and part disgust. ?I?m a freaking English major and I?ve only gotten one!?

I frowned. ?Really??

?It?s framed above my bed as we speak. Hers are the only English classes I ever get B?s in.?

Taking my paper from her, I stared down at the red ?A? in the corner. ?It?s that big a deal??

?It?s an incredibly big deal.? April touched my arm. ?Trust me, if she says you have talent, you?ve got talent.?

Thoughtful, I folded the paper into a square and put it in my bag. ?She wants me to take some writing courses.?

?Ohhh.? She hopped closer to me. ?That?s a great idea. We should go to the registrar right now!?

My eyes widened. ?Now??

?Sure, we could redesign your spring semester?get rid of some of those fluff courses you were so set on taking because of football.? She beamed at me. ?We could even take some classes together. How fun would that be??

It didn?t sound fun. It sounded scary as hell. She was right, though. I didn?t have football anymore, and I needed something to fill the void. I doubted writing would be it, but I didn?t think there was any harm in trying, and I?d have a friend there with me.

A totally nutty friend in combat boots, but she made me laugh. God knew I needed that.

?Alright.? I took a deep breath. ?Let?s do it.?

She clapped her hands, jumped onto my back.

I grunted. ?You?re kinda heavy, you know that??

?Don?t you know you?re never supposed to say that to a woman?? She stretched her arm out, pointing to the registrar?s office. ?Now mush!?

Chuckling, I hooked my hands under her thighs and carried us forward.

*****

Wandering around the room, I studied Walker?s trophies. He had a lot of them. Almost as many as I?d had when I...

?We can?t go backward.?

Best not to think about it too much, then.

I went back to my side of the room. No trophies. Not much of anything else, either. Not even pictures of my family. Was I close to them? I wasn?t before, and Walker said choices from one life bled into the others, so maybe that was why I didn?t have any pictures now.

Could I change that?

I didn?t know. But maybe I could try, when I went home for Thanksgiving. Christmas. Hadn?t gone home for either last year. My chest hitched.

I didn?t want to be alone. The world seemed so much... bigger now. And it would likely keep going in that direction. My family was pretty nice. I should try.

The door flew open, slammed against the wall as Walker stormed in. He stopped in his tracks when he saw me. ?You?re here,? he all but growled.

Cautiously, I backed away from him. ?Where else would I be??

?Feehan?s party.? He threw the door shut. ?Sam said you?d be there.?

Faking a bravery I didn?t feel, I slid my hands into my pockets and looked away. ?Didn?t feel like it.?

?You could have fucking told me that. Shit, Joel! I only went because I thought you were going.?

I frowned, met his gaze again. ?You?ve been swearing an awful lot lately.? I shook my head. ?You never used to curse so much.?

He let loose a string of words that even I?d never thought to put together.

I tilted my head to the side. ?Walker??

?Fuck, I don?t know.? He scrubbed his face with his hand. ?Something about being so big, and hanging out with those jocks every goddam day. It just... comes out.? He looked at me, his face hard. ?You?ve been swearing less.?

My eyebrows rose. ?I suppose I have.?

Walker groaned, went to sit heavily on his bed. ?Three hours.? His back hit the wall. ?I waited three fucking hours for you, Joel. It sucked ass.?

?What? I?m supposed to feel sorry for you??

He shot me a look so dark that I was afraid his next sentence was going to start with ?want.?

But it didn?t.

?Why didn?t you go? You were invited. It was a big party.?

Keeping my distance, I walked around to face him. ?I don?t fit in with those people anymore. And, as nice as Sam is, I don?t think I could have taken him ruffling my hair one more time.? April had invited me to join her book-club friends, but I didn?t fit with them either. So I stayed here, alone in the dorms.

?I would have stopped him from fucking with your hair,? said Walker, his voice determined. ?And anyone else. You should have come.?

He really looked miserable, and I started to get suspicious. ?Are you honestly trying to tell me that you didn?t have any fun at all??

?It was cool and everything. People never looked at me like that before. And so many of them were rubbing up against me, asking me to do all kinds of things to them.? He swept his hand across his chest, and his body undulated under his touch. ?But I kept watching that door, waiting for you to show up. That?s all I really wanted.?

The movement of his body sent a ripple of awareness through my own; shocking me, scaring me. I dismissed the feeling instantly, telling myself it was just the spell, even though he hadn?t invoked it at all since the last time we?d had sex. ?Wh-Why??

His dark gaze focused on me. ?Because you haven?t had fun in so long and,? he blinked, ?I really wanted to see that.?

?You just wanted to watch me?? Almost unconsciously, I stepped closer to him. ?You weren?t planning to use your magic??

He shook his head.

?You?re a liar,? I said softly.

His eyes crinkled at the corners. ?Why do you keep saying that??

I stood between his knees. ?It?s the truth, isn?t it??

?Yeah, but...? He moved away from the wall, sitting straight. ?I?m trying.?

?Trying.? I looked down at him, at the body that was mostly mine. ?I?d do better not to believe a word you say. Ever.?

Walker leaned close, stopped just short of touching me. ?Joel.?

A faint, familiar fragrance wafted up to me. ?I know this perfume,? I murmured. Then, when I recognized it, I took a step back. ?You...?

He looked up at me, confused. ?What??

I?d thought the rage that had been killing me had burned out, leaving me with little more than sadness broken by occasional, tiny sparks of light. But I?d been wrong. It had only been simmering, just below the surface. ?Can you... Can you have sex without me??

He hesitated, nodded.

My hands left my pockets, curled and tightened into fists. ?You son of a...? I couldn?t look at him, knowing if I did I?d lunge for his throat. ?You had sex with Tiffany Miller.?

I heard his breath catch. ?I-I didn?t.?

Every muscle in my body hardened. I couldn?t take him. I knew I couldn?t. But I was about two seconds from driving my fist into his face. ?So much for trying,? I gritted out, my rage spiraling higher with every lie he uttered. ?I can smell her all over you, Walker.?

?Smell...? He made a soft sound of denial. ?You don?t understand. It wasn?t like that.?

?I understand that you?ve reduced me to a sex slave while you can go out and have anyone you want.? I lifted my head, barely able to think through the blood pounding in my veins. ?I understand that your life just keeps getting better and better while...? I laughed bitterly. ?While I?m alone on a Saturday night.?

?Joel??

My fist cocked back and I fired it at him.

Walker caught my forearm, easily stopping the punch from connecting. ?I didn?t fuck her! I?m over six feet tall so she was trying to get into my pants. That?s why her scent?s on my clothes.? He yanked me against his body, wrapped his arms around me. ?I haven?t fucked anyone but you since I cast the spell. You?re the only one I want. You?re the only one I ever want.?

I shoved at his shoulders, and he held me tight. ?I don?t believe you,? I hissed.

His voice darkened the way it did whenever I went too far and tripped his temper. ?That?s a shitload of anger you?ve got over one little girl. I?d think you?d be happy to have me out with other people, since you?re so scared of my cock these days.?

I stiffened.

His teeth nipped at my ear. ?But if you want me that badly, I?m more than willing.?

Fear shot through the rage. ?No!? I fought against his iron hold, tried to block myself from hearing the inevitable words. ?It?s too soon!?

?Mmm.? His mouth moved on to my jaw. ?You?re right. I should savor you, wait until we have something to celebrate.? One of his hands slipped under my shirt, caressed my back. ?But it?s so hard, Joel, when you show me all this raw jealousy.?

Both anger and fear cooled to ice, and I stopped struggling. ?It?s not about that, and you know it. It?s about you having the freedom to do whatever you want, and me... well... whatever I want is dictated by you, isn?t it??

The darkness dissipated from his voice. ?I?m sorry.?

His apology took me off guard. ?What??

?You?re right, I do know you?d never be jealous over me.? His arms loosened, slid up to my face. ?And I?m sorry this spell is going wrong in,? his chest hitched, ?so many ways.?

Was he really trying? Or was it just more lies?

I stepped away from his touch.

Walker?s hands fell to his sides. ?I didn?t fuck her. There?s no way to prove it but...? His mouth worked a few times, before he just repeated himself. ?I didn?t.?

I stared at him a long moment, before grabbing my jacket from a chair and pulling it on.

?Where are you going??

?Out.? I checked my pocket, made sure I had my keys. ?For a walk.?

His torso twisted as he watched me stride toward the door. ?You take one almost every night now. Where do you go??

Surprised, I stopped short. ?How do you know I take one every night??

?I told you: I?m entranced by every little thing you do.?

Unnerved, moving slower, I placed my hand on the doorknob.

?Can I go with you??

My gaze whipped back to him. ?What??

His eyes were wide, hopeful. ?Can I??

?No.? Astonishment actually made my hand slip from the knob. ?I want to get away from you, Walker. That is what the act of me leaving means.?

The hope dwindled away. ?You don?t really mean that, do you? You sit up and watch me sleep every damn night.?

For a second, I couldn?t breathe. ?You... You see that too??

He nodded.

Twisting and turning...
Around and around...

I braced my hand on the door, leaned heavily against it. ?I?ve got to get out of here. I don?t have as much stamina as I used to, but moving my body, it helps.?

?Helps with what??

?You wouldn?t understand.?

?The spinning??

My gaze drifted back to him. ?You know about that??

Walker leaned forward, watching me carefully. ?It?s like you can feel the earth moving on its axis, right under your feet.?

He did know. ?You feel it??

He ducked his head, stared at the floor. ?All the time. Never stops. Sometimes I even get queasy from it, like I?m going to throw up, but I never do.?

I almost started to feel sorry for him, then steeled myself against it. ?Well you deserve to reap every bit of what you?ve sown. It?s your fault I?m in this mess.?

His eyes stayed locked to the floor as he let loose a low, hollow chuckle. ?Yeah.?

That isolation, I understood how it clawed at him, because it clawed at me too. But Walker could go out any time he wanted and erase the feeling. He didn?t even need his name on a list to get into parties.

I opened the door, started to leave. Something pulled me back, against my better judgment.

?Hey.? I glanced at him. ?Why don?t you just make me want you with me on this walk??

He didn?t look at me. Just shrugged.

Common sense told me to drop it, to leave and not look back. But I did look back. And then I walked back.

?Swear to me.?

His head shot up. ?What??

?Swear to me we won?t have sex anymore.?

He lifted his hand, skimmed his fingers along my wrist. ?I can?t.?

I snatched my arm away from his touch. ?Why not!?

?Haven?t you noticed, Joel?? The corner of his mouth curved. Sad. A little tired. ?Fucking is the only thing that makes the spinning... good.?

Rubbing the spot where he?d touched me, I tried not to dwell too much on that. ?Then how can you expect me to...? I took another step back. ?Forget it. I don?t know why I thought I could stand to have you with me.?

His dark eyes were steady on mine. ?I can promise not to fuck you tonight.? His lips parted as he stared at my shoulders, my chest. My hips and my legs. ?I may even be able to control myself through tomorrow night.? He lifted his head, leaned forward. ?How?s that??

I scowled at him. ?That?s it??

The grin that played over his lips was seductive, playful. ?Believe me, as far as guarantees go, that?s stretching it.?

One day and two nights. It was nothing. I almost threw it back into his face. But then I thought about how I?d been living since the first time Walker had said those gut-wrenching words to me.

One day. Two nights. Without fear.

?Promise me,? I said softly.

?I promise.? His smile slipped a notch. ?Think you can trust a liar??

?I?m going to try, because I?m cracking apart inside, and I need this.? My face hardened. ?Do you understand that, Walker? This is important to me. Does that matter??

?Yes.? He rose to his feet, forcing my head to tilt back to keep eye-contact. ?It matters.?

My voice went gruff as I headed out of the room. ?Fine, then you can tag along.?

Outside, the October air was cool and brisk. I buttoned up my jacket, glanced at Walker to find he seemed comfortable to have his jacket open. The white linen shirt he wore hugged his pecs, fell loose around his hips. Navy khakis worshiped the thickness of his legs with every step he took.

Frowning, I thought about the clothes in my closet. While Walker seemed to favor brighter colors these days; I had gone in the opposite direction. Even now I had on a pair of black jeans and a slim black dress-shirt. Helped me blend in, I guess. Easier that way.

?Joel? Have you written any more poetry??

My thoughts snapped back to the present. ?A little.?

?Can I read it??

?No.?

His breath caught, his voice softened. ?Why not??

The stuff I?d been writing lately... it always made me blush. I wasn?t sure why. ?The only ones that get read are the ones I write for homework. The rest stays in my notebook.?

?But why can?t I??

?Because it?s mine,? I snapped. ?I can have something that?s just mine, can?t I? Or do you really want to take every single thing??

He fell quiet, and we walked in silence for a while. Across the quad, past the administration building.

A car backfired, and my whole body jumped. I tried to play it off and kept walking, hoping it had gone unnoticed.

Of course, I wasn?t that lucky.

?Are you okay??

?Fine,? I muttered.

?You?re breathing hard.?

My jaw clenched a moment as I bit back a swear. ?I?m still trying to get used to things. To the idea that things can hurt me, to the idea that I?m average.?

?I wouldn?t let anything hurt you.?

?Shut up.?

?And you?re definitely not average.?

?Again, shut up. None of that?s helping.?

He chuckled. ?Did you know you have a nickname in this life? It?s??

?For the love of god, Walker. If you say it out loud, I swear I will find a way to kick your ass.?

Walker laughed, and in a flash his hands were on me, and I was pinned back against a tree. ?Will you, Thumper??

?Hey!? I started to kick my way free, and he used that move with his legs to keep me still. ?What do you think you?re doing!?

?I was wrong before.? He lowered his head, grazed the tip of his nose over mine. ?When I said you were cute when you?re angry.?

I tried to push myself back, but the tree blocked any chance of escape. ?Y-You were??

He nodded against me, rubbing our cheeks together. ?You?re fucking hot.?

Trembling, I shoved against his rounded shoulders. ?You promised. Less than an hour ago!?

?I promised I wouldn?t fuck you.? His tongue darted out, licked the corner of my mouth as his palm swept up my stomach, my chest. ?I didn?t say anything about touching.? His lips firmed against my skin. ?Or kissing.?

?Son of a?? I bucked against him, trying to break free.

He gasped, and I felt his mouth curve against me in a smile. ?Keep doing that, and you just might drive me to break my promise.?

I instantly went still.

Walker made a sound of disappointment, but it soon faded as he squeezed my chest, my arms. ?Your body?s so tight, Joel. How can you ever think you?re average when all I can think about is how much I want you??

My fingers tightened on his shoulders, and I snatched them back. ?I don?t want you.?

?I know,? he murmured, lifting his head. ?But you?re always watching me. Why is that, I wonder??

Not having an answer, I tried to push him away again. My arms shook and my muscles strained with the effort.

Walker grinned, unmoved and openly amused. ?Curious maybe?? His big hand slid over mine, drew it to the hollow of his throat. ?Want to touch what you?ve been watching so closely??

I tried to resist as he guided my hand downward, as my fingers naturally dipped into the trench carved between his pecs, but he was so much stronger than me. ?No.?

?Oh, come on, Joel. This doesn?t make you gay. It?s...? His brow furrowed thoughtfully. ?It?s your body, after all.?

My breath shuddered in my chest, all but stopped when I felt the hard bulge of his cock against my abdomen. To my horror, my own dick came to life, stiffening against his thigh.

What was going on?

He felt it, I knew he felt it, but he didn?t say anything about it. Didn?t tease me. Instead, his gaze stayed locked to mine as he used my hand to caress his own chest. Slow, torturous strokes. The pads of my fingers grazed his nipple through the material of his shirt, and the whole pectoral muscle twitched as he shivered.

?So fucking good,? he murmured, doing it again, and again.

I?m not sure when I stopped fighting. When I just... let him take control.

Slowly, Walker lowered his head, brushed his lips over mine. Locks of dark hair fell forward, grazed over my cheeks as he slid my hand lower.

I gasped as he deepened the kiss, as he slipped my hand under his shirt so my palm could lay flat against his hard, warm abs.

Walker?s mouth was firm against mine. Caressing. Tasting. Taking.

Always taking.

I bit down on his lower lip. Hard.

He leapt back from me, his hand going to his mouth.

Oh, god.

For all my fantasies of hurting Walker, for all my attempts, now that I?d done it...

I was scared to death to see what he?d do when really pissed at me.

?W-Walker, I...? My mind blanked. I couldn?t think of any way out of this. ?I...?

His hand dipped, and he brushed his thumb over his lower lip as he stared at me.

Right then, the tree behind me was the only thing keeping me on my feet. ?Don?t hurt me,? I whispered.

He smiled. ?Sorry, what did you say??

Confusion drained away a good part of my fear as I watched his thumb continue to stroke his lip. ?You... You liked that??

?Took me by surprise but... hell yeah.? His gaze dropped to my mouth. ?You?ve got nice teeth there, Joel. Use them more often, okay??

My eyes rounded. ?You are such a freak, Walker.?

Chuckling, he let his hand fall to his side. ?Sorta goes with the territory?Cain blood and all. When you?re cursed, you tend to like a... darker flavor to your desire.?

I stared at him, standing there tall and strong, smiling down at me. ?You don?t look cursed to me.?

He shrugged. ?We?re wanderers, outcasts. Tend to be plagued by some fairly serious personality flaws.? Walker chuckled again. ?Guess I don?t have to tell you that, though. You found out up close and personal that I have a certain... moral ambiguity to me.?

How could he... How could he be so flippant about what he?d done to me? ?Go to hell.?

?Yeah.? He broke my gaze, lightly scratched his cheek. ?That?s pretty much a lock.?

Hadn?t expected him to say that, and now I didn?t know how to respond. ?You?re going to hell??

?Part of the curse. In life, I smell like flowers. In death, it?s brimstone for eternity. Package deal.?

I frowned, surprised myself by caring, for just a second. ?Isn?t there anything you can do??

It surprised him, too, and he glanced at me. ?Ah, no. Once, maybe, but...? He shrugged again. ?No, no chance.?

?Aren?t you scared??

?I try not to think about it. But it does probably shape how I?how Cains in general?see the world.? His smile finally slipped from his mouth. ?I take what I want and I don?t... care about the consequences. I?m going to the same place whatever I do. Truth is, usually I don?t even know I?m doing something wrong until you start yelling at me.?

Even though he wasn?t smiling, he didn?t really sound upset. Just... a little shy about sharing with me. And I think that made him even more chilling. ?Me??

He nodded. ?You go into a lot of detail when you chew me out.? He tapped his temple. ?Helps me to put things together. When you stopped talking to me this week, I was...? His eyebrows rose, as if he wasn?t sure whether he had the right word. ?Lost.?

Bullshit. It had to be. ?You never listen to anything I tell you.?

?Oh, I do!? he said eagerly. ?I try, really. I don?t like to see you sad, Joel.?

I couldn?t even comprehend how he thought. It gave me a bizarre, disbelieving kind of awe just trying. ?Do you ever stop lying? If you didn?t want to see me sad, you wouldn?t??

?I do what I have to in order to keep you safe.? He moved closer, caught my wrist. ?And the blood in my veins runs hot.? When I tried to jerk out of his hold, he dragged me against his body. ?Seems like from the moment we met, it only burns for you, and you can?t very well expect me to give that up, can you? It feels too fucking good.? His other hand smoothed over my hair. ?You feel too fucking good.?

Knowing I couldn?t fight, I stood stiff in his hold. ?So, basically, you?ll only do the right thing if it doesn?t contradict what you want.?

?Basically.? He pressed his lips to my forehead. ?When it comes to you, anyway.?

I shuddered, realizing I had no hope of understanding just how deep his obsession with me went.

Walker Cain was cursed, powerful, and totally insane.

[arpeejay]

It's nice to see a muscle story protagonist (for once) getting smarter, although in fact he's constantly shrinking, so perhaps it's really just the same.

You're doing a good job of keeping me guessing, Rowan, and that's always a pleasure. Many thanks!

Richard

[skumbum]

unsurprisingly exciting

[skumbum]

doh, i got beat

[jsmith2300]

Originally Posted by Rowan

Walker?s mouth was firm against mine. Caressing. Tasting. Taking.

Always taking.

I bit down on his lower lip. Hard.

He leapt back from me, his hand going to his mouth.

Oh, god.

For all my fantasies of hurting Walker, for all my attempts, now that I?d done it...

I was scared to death to see what he?d do when really pissed at me.

?W-Walker, I...? My mind blanked. I couldn?t think of any way out of this. ?I...?

His hand dipped, and he brushed his thumb over his lower lip as he stared at me.

Right then, the tree behind me was the only thing keeping me on my feet. ?Don?t hurt me,? I whispered.

He smiled. ?Sorry, what did you say??

Confusion drained away a good part of my fear as I watched his thumb continue to stroke his lip. ?You... You liked that??

?Took me by surprise but... hell yeah.? His gaze dropped to my mouth. ?You?ve got nice teeth there, Joel. Use them more often, okay??

My eyes rounded. ?You are such a freak, Walker.?

Chapter Subtitle: Who knew that twisted could be so HOT!?

Rowan, we really see in this chapter just how obsessed with Joel Walker really is and how he's trying to get Joel to want to want him. It's funny, given how much of Joel's life Walker had taken away. Walker is blissfully ignorant of that fact, which makes the story even more entertaining. The Cain curse really does give Walker an interesting perspective on life ---- if you are going to burn anyway, I guess you may as well take what you want.

I really love how physically dominant Walker has become. At first --- like he says in the chapter --- Walker used to get scared when Joel raised his voice. Not so anymore. The role reversal is complete. Now Joel is scared of Walker and how much more of his life Walker can take away. It's glorious --- I can't even TELL you how much I'm digging this story. It's my favorite part of muscle growth / growth spurts / muscle theft, and you've done it so well; it almost seems effortless.

Very much looking forward to more. Thanks for working as hard as you have to get us each chapter so quickly. I feel so spoiled!

--JSmith

[theseventhwave]

Originally Posted by jsmith2300

Very much looking forward to more. Thanks for working as hard as you have to get us each chapter so quickly. I feel so spoiled!
--JSmith

[COLOR="Red"]Yes, that's it. This story is exhilarating, sensual, tense, delicious, and the pace of each new chapter keeps the excitement building. MmmMmmMmm![/COLOR]

[Clarence591]

Rowan, loving this story. I agree with Arpeejay, about you keeping us guessing. I feel compassion for both characters, I don't know if what's happening to them is a good or bad thing. It seems both men are becoming better people with each change. But fundamentally what Walker has done (and is doing) to Joel is wrong. I'm confused and conflicted. Did I mention I'm loving it!

And I disagree with a comment on a earlier chapter about this story not having any romance. I think this is one of the best romance stories ever. The way the two use words against each other to hide their true feelings is fantastic (genius writing). And when they briefly reveal their real selves, it's heart breaking. Of course I am a little concern is Walker is really insane. That's not very romantic.

I am so grateful that you and Xyggurat have inspired each other to write. Now two of this site's best authors are producing muscle theft stories (my favorite genre). I've gotten away from the topic in my last two posts (I think you mentioned trying new things, ie. taking risks), but currently I working on a story that will return to this subject. Afterall it's what made me want to write in the first place, because there were so few MT stories.

Again thank you for taking on this subject. I'm loving every word of it (help, I'm repeating myself).

[Clarence591]

Sorry, duplicate posting.

[greedycigarson]

Delicious. Sensual. Deep.

I didn't pop a boner reading it... but I kept glancing at the scroll bar, wishing it was further up and that there was more to read.

Not being into theft, it's not surprising that I'm not leaking from the read, but...

It's rare that a fetish story transcends the fetish and becomes a good read on its own. That's where this is at, for me. I probably won't spurt reading it, but.. I can't wait for the next one.

[willsheej]

Originally Posted by greedycigarson

I kept glancing at the scroll bar, wishing it was further up and that there was more to read.

The creepy thing is, I was doing that exact same thing!
I just didn't want the chapter to end.

Simply one of the best muscle theft stories I've ever read. I actually REALLY like the genre but often it becomes a shallow story with a winner and a loser, like a lot of people fear. I like this story simply because it takes muscle theft and puts a much bigger spin on it by giving us a proper story and real people. I can totally see April, Walker, and Joel acting this all out like some American TV drama and that is a pretty special thing that few authors can make me do.

In other words your doing a fantasic job and I can't wait to see the conclusion. It will be VERY interesting to see how this all will end.

[muscl4life]

I never thought i would be discussing Philosophy on a muscle growth forum, but here it goes. Aristotle said that, naturally, men tend to be unfair about sharing the events of life, he wants most of the good things for himself and he tries to get the least of bad things as well. A truly good man is law abidding not because he fears being punished or because he might get some profit by doing so, he does that because he understands that it is the necessary thing to do, in order to share equal amounts of happiness among his peers.

So, my dear Walker Cane cannot be even considered good, in the Aristotlean pont of view... but Aristotle knew nothing about Rowan....

It's impossible not to be seduced by a guy that smells like flowers, how can we still judge Walker for taking Joel's muscles when he is clearly so obssessed with the shrinking guy? How can we defy a character that takes whatever he wants but still appretiates moral advises from the one he steals?

Sincerely, I'm lost Rowan and his flower-scenting guys (Charlie was the first) are simply a puzzle to me... especially because if I remember, Charlie also had a very luring dark side...

DAMN YOU ROWAN!

[DonnieJvilleNC]

Another stellar installment, Rowan! I was actually "giddy" when I saw this was posted...had to read it right away.

[Ender]

[COLOR=#000000]Ahh… at last… some concrete insight into Walker… and what he really intended his spell to do… He’s lonely and wanted a companion… And being a Cain he’s been brought up to believe that regardless of what he does he is doomed… So he figures it’s okay to take what you want… So he attempts to force Joel to be his companion… What seems to have gone wrong with the spell is that Walker doesn’t just lust after Joel as a Cain would typically do, Walker actually loves Joel from the start… [/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000]As things are setup it would seem that for a Cain to love some one is out of character… So why does Walker love Joel? My guess is that Joel accepted Walker as a person more unconditionally than any one else had in his life… and Walker wanted Joel to want/need him in the same way Walker needed and wanted Joel… [/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000]To make Joel feel towards Walker the way Walker feels toward Joel the spell elects to transform Joel and Walker into each other but at a deeper level Walker wants Joel to remain the person he fell in love with… This explains why Joel keeps missing the history updates that every one else is getting… [/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000]A major question is how far will Joel and Walker’s life exchange go? Will Joel become a Cain in place of Walker? (I don’t think that’s likely) Will Walker absorb enough of Joel’s sense of fairness to act to break the spell and release Joel? As I said whether or not Joel gets his life as a jock back he will survive if he can escape from Walkers hold… The real questions here are: 1) Will Walker be saved by releasing Joel 2) Will not releasing Joel result in Walkers damnation? 3) Will releasing Joel destroy Walker…[/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000]Ender[/COLOR]

[Adam]

I should have commented long before now. Another excellent story, Rowan. I'm especially impressed with how quickly new chapters are coming out. Great work!

[TheMM]

*collects bet money*

I heh, can't wait for it to continue.

[Rowan]

Originally Posted by arpeejay

You're doing a good job of keeping me guessing, Rowan, and that's always a pleasure. Many thanks!

Guessing is good! Hopefully I can keep it that way to the last chapter.

Originally Posted by skumbum

unsurprisingly exciting

Um, thanks?

Originally Posted by jsmith2300

Chapter Subtitle: Who knew that twisted could be so HOT!?

Yeah, I find myself liking Walker's complete and utter "seme-ness," which probably says things about me that I'd rather not delve into too deeply.

Originally Posted by theseventhwave

[COLOR=#ff0000]Yes, that's it. This story is exhilarating, sensual, tense, delicious, and the pace of each new chapter keeps the excitement building. MmmMmmMmm![/COLOR]

The dynamic of these two is volatile, heart wrenching, sexy, scary as hell. But it's also compelling, and I've never written a pair remotely similar to them. Great to have a chance to write them.

Originally Posted by Clarence591

Rowan, loving this story. I agree with Arpeejay, about you keeping us guessing. I feel compassion for both characters, I don't know if what's happening to them is a good or bad thing. It seems both men are becoming better people with each change. But fundamentally what Walker has done (and is doing) to Joel is wrong. I'm confused and conflicted. Did I mention I'm loving it!

If you're conflicted, it means I'm doing exactly what I want to with this story. Rock on!

Originally Posted by greedycigarson

It's rare that a fetish story transcends the fetish and becomes a good read on its own.

Thanks.

Originally Posted by willsheej

Simply one of the best muscle theft stories I've ever read. I actually REALLY like the genre but often it becomes a shallow story with a winner and a loser, like a lot of people fear. I like this story simply because it takes muscle theft and puts a much bigger spin on it by giving us a proper story and real people.

I do like the characters in this story. And they all seem to be growing, which definitely keeps me interested.

Originally Posted by muscl4life

It's impossible not to be seduced by a guy that smells like flowers, how can we still judge Walker for taking Joel's muscles when he is clearly so obssessed with the shrinking guy?

There's no doubt that Walker is the wrong doer in this, and that he's got a bloodline that makes him, well, evil. But that total focus on Joel, and his innocence about the way he is, almost makes him... cute.

Originally Posted by DonnieJvilleNC

Another stellar installment, Rowan! I was actually "giddy" when I saw this was posted...had to read it right away.

lol. Hope you like the next installment as much! Posting it today.

Originally Posted by Ender

[COLOR=#000000]A major question is how far will Joel and Walker?s life exchange go?[/COLOR]

I had to construct a freaking chart for this story to keep all that straight. lol.

Originally Posted by Adam

Another excellent story, Rowan. I'm especially impressed with how quickly new chapters are coming out.

I'm kinda impressed too. Especially after I forced myself to step away from the espresso machine.

Originally Posted by TheMM

I heh, can't wait for it to continue.

Chapter 8 today! w00t!